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Did any of you guys/girls lose friends when you came out?

  • 27-04-2014 4:47pm
    #1
    Temaz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,758 ✭✭✭


    When I told me "Friends" they dropped me like a hot potato.

    It was kind of upsetting as I laughed and cried with them through many years of up's and downs and they just shun me.

    I'm a very strong person mentally and I'm kind of enjoying the solitude of it all for the moment.

    Just wondering if anyone else ended up in a similar situation?


Comments

  • #2
    L1011
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 71,186 ✭✭✭✭L1011


    There were two people who could be best described as avoiding me afterwards for a while, neither still is though. One had his younger brother come out very shortly afterwards which I suspect sorted out whatever preconceptions/issues he had.


  • #3
    Aard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,905 ✭✭✭Aard


    People need time to come to terms with it. It would be great if everybody could simply say cool and that's it. But it's not a perfect world and people have different reactions. If you reach out to your friend(s), something might come of it.


  • #4
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I could write novels about my experience. But when "we" came out we lost friends - And mostly from my side cause I was the guy in the relationship who was obviously the source of all evil.

    So to answer your "WHEN you came out" question. Yes. Lots. Our relationship lost a lot of friends.

    But over the time following it we did not obsess about lost friends. We just kept being ourselves. We just kept on keeping on. And if I were to throw out a figure without thinking.... 75% of my friends came back.

    when you "come out" to your friends it is a shock. And like you say in the OP they will drop you.

    Do not let it affect you. Just keep on being who you are. Some "friends" will stay away. But some will come back after the initial "surprise".

    Dont make a big deal about either. But remember it.

    You learn who your real friends are not suddenly or after a real "come out" session. Learning who is a real friend takes time. And some friends stumble along the way. Never judge them on one event, or one reaction.


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