I really want to quit alcohol.

DitzyPoo92

Hi I'm 21 and I seriously can't handle alcohol anymore. I've been drinking since I was 15 and back then it was more fun. I'd feel a bit sick the next day but that's it. But as the years have gone by, I've started drinking more and more and the after effects are much more intense. I can't drink in moderation because I always forget and drink everything in sight. But by far the worst side effect has to be the depression. I get so depressed to the point of wanting to curl up and die with the shame of things I've done that aren't even that bad but seem so much more worse when I'm like this. The depression lasts for 3 days. All I want to do is sleep and when I'm awake I just feel like crying constantly. Then after like 3 days I'm fine again and back to normal. Does anyone else get this? I seriously don't know if I can handle drinking again. It seems to just get worse as the years roll by. Anyone who has been in a similar situation?

xzanti

I would advise reading Alan Carr's Easyway to Quit Alcohol.

Best thing I ever did!

Mightn't work for everyone.. but it did for me!

Good luck!

enoughalready

I second that. Allen Carr's book changed my life! Made me see alcohol for what it really is! Haven't looked back since. Also this forum is fantastic for support. Nothing worse than the psychological effects from abusing alcohol. Far worse, in my opinion, than physical. Good luck in your journey.

Sunnyisland

Hi and welcome dirtypool, you need to get a plan and some goals,here are a few I used and so far with over five years continuese been alcohol free it certainaly helped me, good luck and remember it can be done...

#1 Failure is not an option. When you think you are going to fail, guess what? You FAIL! Wrote this book on this one. Get your mind into a mode of THIS WILL BE DONE. Don't be willy-nilly, or your willy will get nillied. Your mind is your best friend and your biggest enemy. Control IT and you will win. Control your thoughts and you will win.

Get all of the ALcohol out of your house/space. Yes...ALL of it. You don't need a safety net because you are not going to fail. I fought this one hard, but I wasn't able to succeed until I did it. No, I was NOT different than everybody else, I could not resist it if it was in the house. GET IT OUT.

Get your story down as to why you're not drinking. This is important. Get a story together you can live with.so If you are a Type A personality, you might enjoy using 'ALcohol kills my ulcers'. If you are a health nuts, "I'm detoxing"....religious nut? "I gave it up for Lent and felt so good I kept going".....you get the idea. Get your story and stick to it.

As Alkies, we aren't used to eating. This is the SILVER BULLET to succeeding. If you have a bad craving and The Voices are knocking, EAT! Eat until you are FULL! Remember those times when you've said, "I can't eat another bite of anything!" That's the full we're talking about. You will not want anything if you EAT!

You are gonna feel like **** for a few days. I felt flu-like for the first couple weeks, so treat yourself well. Drink plenty of fluids and rest! Your body is changing over from an ethanol burning engine to a food/nutrient burning machine. Have patience as your body makes this transition.

Keep yourself out of temptation.NO, you are not stronger than this thing, protect your young quit with everything you've got. Stay out of bars and avoid alcohol gettogethers, you know the ones I am talking about,especially the first 3 or 4 weeks. In my case I stayed away from them for over 3 months,I don't care how strong you feel, this is a new thing for us and temptation is everywhere. Avoid it at all costs.

Change your mindset from one of deprivation to one of gratitude. Just look at the folks on here who have made Great changes in their lives!!! They are HAPPY and optimistic! Does this sound like someone who considers themselves deprived? It's all a matter of perspective. Thank God, you don't HAVE to drink today!!! Remember, to a worm, digging around in the hard old ground is a lot more relaxing than going fishing! Try not to throw, attend and participate in Pity Parties, they serve no good purpose.

Glue yourself to this site and others like it nd learn everything you can about this condition we have. Knowledge is power. Nothing we do or think hasn't been done or thought before, so look back on the years of experience here and you will find out what happens if you do such and such.

Let go of the past... don't look back. Let it go. ALL of it. Forgive yourself and move on....nothing to see here. There is NOTHING we can do to change what we've done, but we can start today and make things better for our future.

This is key! Being part of a group is important. Like so many have said recently, we find that we actually don't have a much of a life outside the bottle! So learning to trust others again is part of our emotional growth and healing.You just regained about 4-6 hours a day back,The world out there is telling us to do something totally counter to what we know we must do. Staying connected with like-minded people is vital. We are swimming upstream on this one...it's nice to have fellow fish to make the journey with and good luck everyone again.

Ghostbusthat

I'm 21 as well and feel the exact same way you do. I've stopped drinking for a couple of weeks-months before but never been determined enough to quit completely. I've definitely had enough of it now at this stage, and i've decided to completely give it up.

Sunnyisland

Ghostbusthat wrote: »

I'm 21 as well and feel the exact same way you do. I've stopped drinking for a couple of weeks-months before but never been determined enough to quit completely. I've definitely had enough of it now at this stage, and i've decided to completely give it up.

Good for you ghostbuster, read this forum as much as you can as there is some great advice here, good luck.

Lavendula

Hi,thanks realies, some really good advice there.
I'm 31 and just feel drained from alcohol.
I feel very lucky that other parts of my life are going really well. However it's like this dark cloud descends on me every couple of months and I go on a serious binge that leaves me like a pathetic version of who I really am.
This has been the case since my mid 20s. I always convince myself that I can handle it, just have 1 or 2 (generally this is the case) but then the binge bus comes in to town, usually when I'm feeling really good and I really let myself down with my behaviour.
The negatives for me with alcohol.
- I completely black out and end up with no idea of where I was or what I was doing.
- I can be paranoid and abusive when drunk.
- no one wants to be the 30 odd year old pissed falling around the local pub. I want to be better than that.
- I end up with 4 day hangovers where I cannot interact with other people.
- anything that has been negative in my life in the last number of years has come down to alcohol.

I really like realies advice that 'failure is not an option'
I have been a long time lurker around this forum, but I'm hoping that with the help of you kind people, I can finish sabotaging my life once and for all.
Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated.
Anyways here's to day 4 off the booze.
Lavendula

souls

Lavendula wrote: »

Hi,thanks realies, some really good advice there.
I'm 31 and just feel drained from alcohol.
I feel very lucky that other parts of my life are going really well. However it's like this dark cloud descends on me every couple of months and I go on a serious binge that leaves me like a pathetic version of who I really am.
This has been the case since my mid 20s. I always convince myself that I can handle it, just have 1 or 2 (generally this is the case) but then the binge bus comes in to town, usually when I'm feeling really good and I really let myself down with my behaviour.
The negatives for me with alcohol.
- I completely black out and end up with no idea of where I was or what I was doing.
- I can be paranoid and abusive when drunk.
- no one wants to be the 30 odd year old pissed falling around the local pub. I want to be better than that.
- I end up with 4 day hangovers where I cannot interact with other people.
- anything that has been negative in my life in the last number of years has come down to alcohol.

I really like realies advice that 'failure is not an option'
I have been a long time lurker around this forum, but I'm hoping that with the help of you kind people, I can finish sabotaging my life once and for all.
Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated.
Anyways here's to day 4 off the booze.
Lavendula

Hi Lavendula firstly fair play on day 4 off the booze!If you were anything like me on day 4 you have my deepest sympathies because the reality is you probably feel like death warmed up! honestly there's not much i can really say to make things feel better for you straight away… I'm a similar age and tick all the boxes of what you just listed regarding the effect booze has had on your life.. so i empathize with you 100%!!

What i can say however is do not give up!it won't feel like this forever, but you have to dig in and give it 110% right now!dont let your mind race ahead of itself!keep it in the here and now play it minute by minute if you have to! the fact that your on here is great! go through the threads and view all realies posts!! great info,support and advice to be found!

keep us posted!

Lavendula

souls wrote: »

Hi Lavendula firstly fair play on day 4 off the booze!If you were anything like me on day 4 you have my deepest sympathies because the reality is you probably feel like death warmed up! honestly there's not much i can really say to make things feel better for you straight away… I'm a similar age and tick all the boxes of what you just listed regarding the effect booze has had on your life.. so i empathize with you 100%!!

What i can say however is do not give up!it won't feel like this forever, but you have to dig in and give it 110% right now!dont let your mind race ahead of itself!keep it in the here and now play it minute by minute if you have to! the fact that your on here is great! go through the threads and view all realies posts!! great info,support and advice to be found!

keep us posted!

Hi souls,
Thank you so much for your kind words! It's great to know someone has gone through a similar situation.
You guessed it, today was tough!! I actually had to stop myself from crying today.. Which is very very unusual. I still feel like sh#t from the weekend and coupled with serious stress from work it kind of got on top of me.
Went down to the athletic club to do a bit of training, I feel a bit better now...but still I am terrified at the thought of giving up alcohol, it just seems so big and final.
It's funny I ran in to a guy I know today who is a non drinker, I always really admired him, he goes out and has fun, but he never wanted to drink because of stuff he saw as a young fella. I just want to be free from this curse.
It is frightening some of the stuff I have done when drunk/ blacked out. I am really frightened about what lies ahead if I drink again.
I can't even tell my partner yet about my plans as I just don't think she will understand..
I am going on a stag on Saturday night (I am grooms man so have to go) I am planning on going with the antibiotics line. I am usually the life and soul of the party.. But no more for me.
Failure is not an option.
Again thank you for your kind words, it is great to have this forum as I feel I want to keep this to myself for the next while.
I will keep you posted.
Lavendula

Lavendula

DitzyPoo92 wrote: »

Hi I'm 21 and I seriously can't handle alcohol anymore. I've been drinking since I was 15 and back then it was more fun. I'd feel a bit sick the next day but that's it. But as the years have gone by, I've started drinking more and more and the after effects are much more intense. I can't drink in moderation because I always forget and drink everything in sight. But by far the worst side effect has to be the depression. I get so depressed to the point of wanting to curl up and die with the shame of things I've done that aren't even that bad but seem so much more worse when I'm like this. The depression lasts for 3 days. All I want to do is sleep and when I'm awake I just feel like crying constantly. Then after like 3 days I'm fine again and back to normal. Does anyone else get this? I seriously don't know if I can handle drinking again. It seems to just get worse as the years roll by. Anyone who has been in a similar situation?

Hi ditzypoo,
From my experience, yes it does get worse as the years go on. I hope you find the strength to do, what you feel is right for your own life.
Sorry for hijacking your thread, but safety in numbers, eh?
Lavendula

souls

DitzyPoo92 wrote: »

Hi I'm 21 and I seriously can't handle alcohol anymore. I've been drinking since I was 15 and back then it was more fun. I'd feel a bit sick the next day but that's it. But as the years have gone by, I've started drinking more and more and the after effects are much more intense. I can't drink in moderation because I always forget and drink everything in sight. But by far the worst side effect has to be the depression. I get so depressed to the point of wanting to curl up and die with the shame of things I've done that aren't even that bad but seem so much more worse when I'm like this. The depression lasts for 3 days. All I want to do is sleep and when I'm awake I just feel like crying constantly. Then after like 3 days I'm fine again and back to normal. Does anyone else get this? I seriously don't know if I can handle drinking again. It seems to just get worse as the years roll by. Anyone who has been in a similar situation?

Hi Ditzypoo, hope you're holding up alright? I can definitely relate to all of the above! though i chose to ignore it for another 9 years! at least you seem to be mature enough to realize that something's not sitting right here and are seeking help.

Maybe you should knock it on the head,give your body and mind a chance to recover..do you have any hobbies, interests you could join a running club or do a class to get yourself into different social circles away from the boozy nights out!

ohgodz

Hi I've just turned 40. I definitely drink too much. I have given up many times for short periods of time, sometimes for 3 months at a maximum. At one stage I drank heavily for a few years continuously. In the last few years i have been drinking less and this last year i would say that i didn't drink that heavily on a continuous basis, but there have been plenty of binges.

I'm successful money and career wise (luck and persistence) and I have a lot of good relationships. I'm also kind of fit. Its remarkable that my life is not more of a mess. However, the whole thing is such a struggle. When I don't drink for a few weeks I'm happy and giving and loving and a really good vibe to be around. When I'm drinking I'm a bit of a downer to be around probably.

Anyways, I just wish I'd given up drink when it was becoming a problem. I would say that its been a problem for 7 or 8 years but it was starting to be an issue 10 years ago.

I have tried drinking in moderation, drinking occasionally, drinking once every 3 months, once every week, drinking one bottle of wine a week, just having 5 pints every second saturday....etc. All lies to myself. None of these approaches lasts and as soon as i feel happy and full of life and vitality i go out and get pissed to celebrate, then i go and do the same the next night and so a roll begins.

I'm giving up booze(and other party drugs) now. I always enjoy my life when sober, I even enjoy the pub(at least if you are sober you can drive and so escape if its boring or leave with a lady if you get lucky). I know the next ten years will be way way way better for me if I live them without drink and drugs.

I'm going to tell people that I'm training for a sport event, maybe a sea swim event. I'm going to tell them 'I'm an athlete' as a positive response to the question "why aren't you drinking?"

So anyway, do give up that feckin drink.

snaphook

The following story is the reason why I am cutting the booze out of my life step by step. It's been hard but I know it's worth it.

I hope to be a father in future with my OH.

I am 33 now, and when I made my Confirmation back in 1993,
I like everyone else came into some cash. £300. A significant sum at the time.
Especially for a 12 year old. My dad was just turned 44.

The following day I was just after getting dressed and my Dad came into my room.

To this day I can recall the conversation verbatim.

"Would you give me a loan of £20 and I'll pay you back next week?"

(He knew I had made some money,
I knew exactly why he was asking for it,
£20 would get you at least 10-15 pints back then).

"I don't have it, I gave it to my mam to mind it"

(I didn't give it to her, I had it in my jacket pocket, so I had to lie).

"Right, that's grand so, thanks very much"

(He knew I was lying but didn't want to say).

It's the way of the alcoholic. He was short on cash, wanted a binge, and resorted to asking a 12 year old for a loaner to see him through. Yet I was the one who felt bad about the whole thing.

I only wanted to try and do him a favour but I was made feel like I had done something wrong.

If I ever have such a conversation with a child of my own, I will have failed them as a father. Period.

grouplout

I agree. Read "Alan Carr's Easyway to Quit Alcohol". Life Changing.

KeefF

snaphook wrote: »

The following story is the reason why I am cutting the booze out of my life step by step. It's been hard but I know it's worth it.

I hope to be a father in future with my OH.

I am 33 now, and when I made my Confirmation back in 1993,
I like everyone else came into some cash. £300. A significant sum at the time.
Especially for a 12 year old. My dad was just turned 44.

The following day I was just after getting dressed and my Dad came into my room.

To this day I can recall the conversation verbatim.

"Would you give me a loan of £20 and I'll pay you back next week?"

(He knew I had made some money,
I knew exactly why he was asking for it,
£20 would get you at least 10-15 pints back then).

"I don't have it, I gave it to my mam to mind it"

(I didn't give it to her, I had it in my jacket pocket, so I had to lie).

"Right, that's grand so, thanks very much"

(He knew I was lying but didn't want to say).

It's the way of the alcoholic. He was short on cash, wanted a binge, and resorted to asking a 12 year old for a loaner to see him through. Yet I was the one who felt bad about the whole thing.

I only wanted to try and do him a favour but I was made feel like I had done something wrong.

If I ever have such a conversation with a child of my own, I will have failed them as a father. Period.

I was in that situation many times with my own father in my teenage years with my father - first I've ever heard anyone with the same story.

danbrosnan

There is only one way to give it up.... Ive tried everything and failed.... When you give up alcohol its such a positive you will never turn back..

LeonardNelson

DitzyPoo92 wrote: »

Hi I'm 21 and I seriously can't handle alcohol anymore. I've been drinking since I was 15 and back then it was more fun. I'd feel a bit sick the next day but that's it. But as the years have gone by, I've started drinking more and more and the after effects are much more intense. I can't drink in moderation because I always forget and drink everything in sight. But by far the worst side effect has to be the depression. I get so depressed to the point of wanting to curl up and die with the shame of things I've done that aren't even that bad but seem so much more worse when I'm like this. The depression lasts for 3 days. All I want to do is sleep and when I'm awake I just feel like crying constantly. Then after like 3 days I'm fine again and back to normal. Does anyone else get this? I seriously don't know if I can handle drinking again. It seems to just get worse as the years roll by. Anyone who has been in a similar situation?

Quitting is a good choice. Your still young and can do a lot of wonderful things in life. If you quit early the early chance of saving yourself to misery. I hope you'll find the inspiration to stop. Take care of your health.

ladiesman217

Hi guys, newbee to this section of the boards website, some interesting issues. Drink plays a large role in our society and is the cause of many a problem on our streets. Peer pressure plays a hug part in why young people drink and unfortunately goes hand in hand with being a student. I am now 35, I started drinking when I was about 11 or 12, very young I know:( but that was the age you started where Im from. Drinking in my 20's was ok, I can remember going to work on a monday morning after a night out on Saturday /Sunday , you were never right till about Wednesday, I get the gitters just thinking about it. I went back to college in my late 20's and thats where I really cut down. These days I rarely go out, if i do is for a meal and a bottle of wine with my partner, and thats as rare as hens teeth. I think if your partner is not a drinker it can be easy to turn your back on that way of life, but if your single it can be a little hard to do, just in terms of meeting people.

My advice is just cut down on the amount you drink, I fined if your in good conversations with people in the pub you tend to drink less, also get home before 1, anytime after that things just go mad. You will gradually just stop drinking. Try and focus yourself on a sport, running maybe, gives you a good natural high, a high drink could never touch. best of luck with it, and keep posting, let us know how your getting on

I'm 22 and a long time lurker of this boards section. Decided to finally take the plunge and post!

I had been wanting to quit for a while as my own intake on a night out had skyrocketed and I just wasn't enjoying it as much as I once had. I went from being a 'few pints' person to getting hammered and being completely out of character. The loss of self control and the inevitable 'fear' the morning after were enough to make me give it a shot. I'm quite into fitness too so there was always the extra incentive to give up!

With a lot of inspiration from these boards I've drastically cut down on my intake in the last couple of months. This thread in particular stood out as OP is close to my own age which is rare in our society. It's really hard sometimes because the majority of people I've spoken to see a young person as someone who "should be out every weekend living their lives and enjoying themselves". But I've finally admitted to myself that living my life and enjoying it and sitting in a pub every weekend are not the same thing.

The posts here really are encouraging and it's great to read about so many people having positive experiences from their decision to cut down/ give up drinking! I've also felt a lot of these benefits in terms of concentration, more energy and just a sense of better wellbeing

The hardest part for me is that the auld love life has taken a bit of a hit. Social life is still grand I'm out a lot with friends doing other things besides pubs and clubs but as a society so dependent on drink and dating norms revolving around it it's still taking some getting used to!

Sorry for the rant just thought I'd share and say hello

Bill Lee

Deleted User wrote: »

The hardest part for me is that the auld love life has taken a bit of a hit. Social life is still grand I'm out a lot with friends doing other things besides pubs and clubs but as a society so dependent on drink and dating norms revolving around it it's still taking some getting used to!

Sorry for the rant just thought I'd share and say hello

Try internet dating. You'll find a lot of girls who are non-drinkers or who drink very little. Especially if you have a fancy for the foreign ladies... :-)

mickydoomsux

Bill Lee wrote: »

Try internet dating. You'll find a lot of girls who are non-drinkers or who drink very little.

I found the exact opposite. Nearly every girls profile lists "drinking" or "going out at weekends with my friends" as a hobby and any of the girls i've gotten chatting with have been drinkers.

Bill Lee

mickydoomsux wrote: »

I found the exact opposite. Nearly every girls profile lists "drinking" or "going out at weekends with my friends" as a hobby and any of the girls i've gotten chatting with have been drinkers.

I dunno. Try Badoo. There's lots of girls there who state that they are non-drinkers. On PlentyofFish I did find that the majority all seem obsessed with vodka and going out. Mostly Irish girls, unfortunately.

I'm currently seeing a 23-year old Brazilian who drinks very little and can't stand nightclubs. I'm happy.

Bill Lee

Bill Lee wrote: »

I dunno. Try Badoo. There's lots of girls there who state that they are non-drinkers. On PlentyofFish I did find that the majority all seem obsessed with vodka and going out. Mostly Irish girls, unfortunately.

I'm currently seeing a 23-year old Brazilian who drinks very little and can't stand nightclubs. I'm happy.

I may give that a go! Tried PoF and it wasn't really for me for the same reasons as yourself! But like I said this is the only real issue that's come up. In general the benefits of feeling happier, more energetic and having real conversation and not just drunken s*** talk definitely outweigh the snag on the relationship front. At least for me they do anyway!

mickydoomsux

Hah, it was PoF i was talking about

souls

Bill Lee wrote: »

I'm currently seeing a 23-year old Brazilian who drinks very little and can't stand nightclubs. I'm happy.

Id be fairly chuffed with myself too,if I were you!

LeonardNelson

Ghostbusthat wrote: »

I'm 21 as well and feel the exact same way you do. I've stopped drinking for a couple of weeks-months before but never been determined enough to quit completely. I've definitely had enough of it now at this stage, and i've decided to completely give it up.

Way to go into your decision. Remember, a complete recovery is no turning back to the old habits. You have alot of things to do for you to enjoy life. Keep the willpower with you.

iusedtoknow

Bill Lee wrote: »

I'm currently seeing a 23-year old Brazilian who drinks very little and can't stand nightclubs. I'm happy.

I married a spaniard who can count on 1 hand how many drinks she's had her entire life. In fairness, that's rare enough for the spanish, but she spent her late teens and her early 20's studying medicine and is now a doctor - she prefers a a straight head on her shoulders all the time, especially if there is a "is anyone a doctor" situation that arises.

It is funny how much more of tendency that way the Irish have

tsingwen

I'm 20,drink less than before

LeonardNelson

ladiesman217 wrote: »

Hi guys, newbee to this section of the boards website, some interesting issues. Drink plays a large role in our society and is the cause of many a problem on our streets. Peer pressure plays a hug part in why young people drink and unfortunately goes hand in hand with being a student. I am now 35, I started drinking when I was about 11 or 12, very young I know:( but that was the age you started where Im from. Drinking in my 20's was ok, I can remember going to work on a monday morning after a night out on Saturday /Sunday , you were never right till about Wednesday, I get the gitters just thinking about it. I went back to college in my late 20's and thats where I really cut down. These days I rarely go out, if i do is for a meal and a bottle of wine with my partner, and thats as rare as hens teeth. I think if your partner is not a drinker it can be easy to turn your back on that way of life, but if your single it can be a little hard to do, just in terms of meeting people.

My advice is just cut down on the amount you drink, I fined if your in good conversations with people in the pub you tend to drink less, also get home before 1, anytime after that things just go mad. You will gradually just stop drinking. Try and focus yourself on a sport, running maybe, gives you a good natural high, a high drink could never touch. best of luck with it, and keep posting, let us know how your getting on

Your advices are efficient. The influence of alcohol can cause violence like the fight on the streets, driving accidents, do your work less and can give harmful diseases. After doing my research project that deals with alcohol I came to know the overview how someone begins and ends the relationship of a human and alcohol. For someone who abuse it, it never easy to solve the problems, I realize that it takes long process and commitment to meet a successful recovery. Its a big help too whenever there will be someone by your side to support you like your family and friends. Don't hesitate to accept the help. I'm glad that your partner helps you out. Otherwise, everyone is not alone on they're battle, alcohol abuse rehab are more willingly to serve and help someone through their issues and problems regarding alcohol abuse. I hope everyone can all find their way back to there normal life, most of all it is advisable that there will be no turning back to the darkness of the past. Goodluck to everyone.