I feel like I constantly disappoint people

LegacyUser

Hi everyone, like the title says I feel like I'm constantly disappointing people, my family, my friends and my girlfriend. I've spent a long time in college over 2 courses and am currently unemployed. I'm emigrating soon to hopefully find work.

It feels like everything I try and do I fail at. I was looking for work and got nothing but rejection letters. I have failed my driving test twice since being unemployed. My confidence is at an all time low and now I'm about to move country. All I can think of is what if that doesnt work out either. I'm being pushed to do my test again but dont want to because I think I'll fail and dont think I can take another knock to my confidence. I feel like I'm letting that person down too because they think I'm mad not to do it before I go.
My girlfriend has been helping in supporting me since I finished college and I feel like I'm a constant drain on her and all these failures and rejections make me feel like I'm disappointing her, it feels like constant failure and I can imagine thats getting annoying for her too.

I try and put on a brave face to everyone that all this doesnt get me down but inside I'm a wreck. I just feel like a waste of space right now

gugleguy

i can't drive and I'm 42. My qualifications up to now are'nt great. I'm attending no re unions, third level or otherwise - I was brutal.
I don't need to mentally feel inferior tho. I am doing some bits and pieces for now, hope it will add up to something in due course. I'm not on and don't like facebook. but i'm on google+.
- Explore other directions OP. Your trying to follow the crowd too much to be successful, a common Irish phenomena I know.
I don't have a gf either. And I have a LinkedIn profile (and seriously, this has done me good, I've got positive feedback from people on linked in in North America)

Tokyo

constantlydisappointing wrote: »

I'm emigrating soon to hopefully find work.

That doesn't sound too disappointing to me - I read that as you being proactive about your situation and trying to do something about it. The job market being what it is at the moment, plenty of people are in the same situation as you and wouldn't even consider going overseas, so don't beat yourself up over that.

Regarding your driving test, I failed my motorbike test first time round, I'd imagine that if you asked most people here, a fair percentage have had the same issue. If you are that concerned about it, don't pressure yourself, find yourself an understanding driving instructor who will go through it all with you and focus on the points that you failed the test on. By the time you sit it again, you'll be able to do it blindfolded

LegacyUser

I know emigrating is a positive thing but its terrifying me and I'm afraid of failing again because thats all I seem to be doing recently.

As regards the driving test, I've failed twice and am being pushed to do it really soon before I go. I dont want to because I dont think I can pass but the person pushing me to do it sees it as a waste of the last year learning to drive if I dont so it now. Another disappointment. I feel like I'm constantly failing

LegacyUser

I just feel like I'm not good enough for these people that I disappoint

Merkin

I know emigrating is a positive thing but its terrifying me and I'm afraid of failing again because thats all I seem to be doing recently.

Funnily enough, this is probably the very thing that will boost your confidence and get you back on track. It takes kahunas to up sticks and set off for the unknown but it's character building and it will afford you a wonderful fresh start. Go with the attitude that the world is your oyster and it will be. I don't know where you intend to go to but there are a number of very active ex-pat forums on Boards so it would be a good start to look at the appropriate one and get your questions together.

As regards the driving test, I've failed twice and am being pushed to do it really soon before I go. I dont want to because I dont think I can pass but the person pushing me to do it sees it as a waste of the last year learning to drive if I dont so it now. Another disappointment. I feel like I'm constantly failing

Lots of people don't pass the first time or second time. If I were you, I'd go and rebook the test asap and go and get some really good pre-test lessons with some reputable instructor. If you failed twice for the same reasons, brush up on that with the help of an extra couple of lessons. You can do it and it will open up more doors to you with regards to employment when you move country.

You're just in a bit of a rut m'dear. You have what a lot of people would give an eye tooth for, i.e. supportive family, friends and a girlfriend. Everyone has their own cross to bear so focus on what you can do in the short-term to turn things around and everything else will fall into place for you.

December2012

It took me three attempts to get my driving licence.

The driving test and interviews are completely impersonal. So you're not letting down any person at all.

Do you feel like you're letting yourself down?

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies everyone.
I dont really feel like I'm letting myself down, its more I'm letting others down, people who have done so much for me. I think the more I talk/think about it its a confidence thing. Right now I'm not sure I could take another failure literally days before I head off into something very scary(for me anyway).