I like this! Marriage Dance (sometimes called Generation Dance)

amdublin

From: http://www.rentadj.com/new_traditions.htm

Marriage Dance (sometimes called Generation Dance)
All the married couples, including the both of you are invited onto the dance floor. The DJ plays a beautiful romantic slow song (Like “Always & Forever”, “Through the Years”, or “Just You & I”) and all the couples dance. Following a little dancing, the DJ asks all those couples married three years or less (Except the Bride & Groom) to leave the dance floor. After some more dancing, all the couple married 10 years or less are asked to “Take a break” from dancing. Then 20 years, then 30 years. After 30, the figures change to 31, 32, 33 etc. until the couple married the longest remains. The Bride and Groom should then exchange partners with the final couple, creating a touching moment for all involved.

** Variation: When it comes down to the final couple, the music fades and the DJ asks the couple to introduce themselves, and perhaps give the Bride and Groom a piece of advice on hoe to maintain a successful marriage. Then a new love song begins (“Have I told you Lately”, “Endless Love”), and is dedicated it to both couples who should exchange partners. (Great photo opportunity and/or video moment.)

My personal experience of it:
I was at a wedding where the bride asked all married couples to email her their wedding photo before the wedding.

As the above dance was on the photos were displayed on a big screen behind the dance floor.
* The photos were in the order of years ie. most recently married couples were shown first.
* As your photo appeared you were invited to "take a break"
* Until as above the newly married couple were just left with the longest married couple on the dance floor (awwwww!)

What you think?! Any b&g's who are planning their wedding would consider this for their wedding?

eviltwin

Its a nice idea but I wouldn't restrict it to married couples, I think those in a relationship who aren't married should be included too.

amdublin

eviltwin wrote: »

Its a nice idea but I wouldn't restrict it to married couples, I think those in a relationship who aren't married should be included too.

Yeah I was thinking that...but you are kind of celebrating the newly married couples's marriage and equally the other couple's marriage

eviltwin

amdublin wrote: »

Yeah I was thinking that...but you are kind of celebrating the newly married couples's marriage and equally the other couple's marriage

I can understand that and I know its a wedding but I think there is too much focus on marriage, plenty of couples don't marry and there are same sex couples of course who would also be excluded. I think if the focus is on celebrating long term relationships which is obviously what everyone wants for the couple its nice to open it to everyone.

amdublin

eviltwin wrote: »

I can understand that and I know its a wedding but I think there is too much focus on marriage, plenty of couples don't marry and there are same sex couples of course who would also be excluded. I think if the focus is on celebrating long term relationships which is obviously what everyone wants for the couple its nice to open it to everyone.

Agree!

BabysCoffee

Great concept but as EvilTwin pointed out it is a little exclusionary........

Addle

amdublin wrote: »

Yeah I was thinking that...but you are kind of celebrating the newly married couples's marriage and equally the other couple's marriage

+1

I don't think it would be reasonable for any unmarried couples, or anyone else, to be offended at being excluded from a bit like this.

I think it's a lovely idea, my only fear is that the type of people you'd want to partake in it would be slow to join in.

Senna

Jesus you cant do anything now without offending someone or having people rush to inform you that it COULD be offensive, its a lovely idea and I cant say I have ever seen it done.

dudara

It seems a lovely idea. However, I'm sure some people wouldn't like to be put in the spotlight like that. if you do decide to it, perhaps a little preliminary investigation. Plus I wouldn't exclude non-married couples. Some people aren't married for genuine reasons but could have spent decades as partners

BabysCoffee

dudara wrote: »

It seems a lovely idea. However, I'm sure some people wouldn't like to be put in the spotlight like that. if you do decide to it, perhaps a little preliminary investigation. Plus I wouldn't exclude non-married couples. Some people aren't married for genuine reasons but could have spent decades as partners

Yes maybe it would work better as a staged event with sets of handpicked participants

eviltwin

Senna wrote: »

Jesus you cant do anything now without offending someone or having people rush to inform you that it COULD be offensive, its a lovely idea and I cant say I have ever seen it done.

It wouldn't be for fear of offending anyone that I would make it all inclusive, its about recognising that relationships come in many different forms and acknowledging that.

clint_silver

There are a lot of games or crowd events that bands and djs can do, I always ask B&g if they want and the answer is invariably no but they say yes I think they do work.
Go to YouTube and search for DJ wedding tricks, they're practically all American which is why a lot of irish people won't have seen them. But they're expected at the American ones to make more of a show on the night.
Needs a good guy on the mic to control it.
No reason why any of them wouldn't work over here as long as the music is right.

krankykitty

I think it depends on the crowd really. Some people would be cringing at being in the spotlight like that, so you'd need to have people on board to do it. Plus I agree with those that said it should be about relationships as opposed to marriage.

Matt_Trakker

Honestly, it's both weird and lame, don't do it.

cookiecakes

Jeepers,I was mortified during my own first dance with people looking at me, never mind being a part of someone else's. Plus I would hate the idea of excluding my mates who are single or gay or just plain old not married. We even asked the dj at ours not to ask couples to join us during our first dance because it just seemed so 'we don't care about you if you're single'. To each, their own I suppose but I would HATE this!

Electric Sheep

cookiecakes wrote: »

Jeepers,I was mortified during my own first dance with people looking at me, never mind being a part of someone else's. Plus I would hate the idea of excluding my mates who are single or gay or just plain old not married. We even asked the dj at ours not to ask couples to join us during our first dance because it just seemed so 'we don't care about you if you're single'. To each, their own I suppose but I would HATE this!

I thnk that dance could be quite painful for the widowed, weddings can be hard enough on them without emphasising the loss of their spouse.

cookiecakes

Electric Sheep wrote: »

I thnk that dance could be quite painful for the widowed, weddings can be hard enough on them without emphasising the loss of their spouse.

I agree. My family has lost a fair few members over the past couple of years and I can just imagine some of my aunts faces when they heard this. We danced on our own for about a minute and a half then had the dj invite everyone to join us on the dance floor. It was tons of fun!

Addle

Jeez-why marry at all?!

amdublin

We might all be overthinking it a bit!

I thought it was cute when I was at a wedding and they did it (see my op)

Electric Sheep

amdublin wrote: »

We might all be overthinking it a bit!

I thought it was cute when I was at a wedding and they did it (see my op)

I suppose we might be. I guess the bridge and groom would know if any of their guests would be likely to be reminded of a painful loss.

rainbowtrout

amdublin wrote: »

We might all be overthinking it a bit!

I thought it was cute when I was at a wedding and they did it (see my op)

Why? You clearly like it, a lot of other posters think it's exclusionary for a variety of reasons. Personally I think it's a bit exclusionary myself and a bit weird.

stinkle

I think it's a lovely idea, but agree that it might be seen as a bit "exclusive". I tried to think who would be the "longest married" of our guests - it's my OH's great aunt and her husband by a long shot (60+ years!). Now they're very young at heart and healthy but I havent seen them in a while and have no idea if either of them is able to dance much.

I think my own aunt and her husband would be the longest on my side, but unfortunately he's not well and is unlikely to be able to attend. Even if he can be there there he cant dance anymore and they were fab dancers back in their heyday, so it might be a sad thing for us to attempt I also have an uncle and aunt who should have split up years ago - dont fancy forcing them to dance! Actually the more I think of my dysfunctional relatives the worse this idea sounds for our day specifically........ :pac:

I like the "wedding picture" idea and would like to try and incorporate it using pics of our grandparents perhaps as a way to remember them.

cookiecakes

stinkle wrote: »

I like the "wedding picture" idea and would like to try and incorporate it using pics of our grandparents perhaps as a way to remember them.

We had pictures of our parents and grandparents on their wedding days over by our wedding cake. We had loads of people compliment us on it and our aunts and uncles loved that we had a way to include our grandparents ,who have sadly passed, in our day.