Another work issue :(

LegacyUser

I started a new job in a large company about a month ago. I've had problems with depression and anxiety for a long time so I've only taken on low-level / low stress jobs for the past for years and I've been coping really well. This new job was advertised as a low level job but the pay was much higher than usual and I couldn't believe my luck when i got it. I signed the contracts and couldn't wait to start.

The first day, however, i was told that the department was merging with another and that I wouldn't be working in the job that I had applied for but another one for the same pay. I have a good degree and I have worked in administration in the past (pre depression / anxiety) so they gave me an admin job. They gave me a new job title and a whole new job spec, this job is NOT low level.

I've been steadily getting more and more anxious so i went to see my department head to talk about it on Friday. She was really nice but more or less said I was stuck were I was. Cue a weekend meltdown. I haven't felt this bad for a long, long time and I thought I was going to end up in hospital. I couldn't stop shaking or crying and I felt suicidal. I haven't slept for the last 2 nights and this morning I physically could not get up when it was time to go to work. I sent a text saying I was sick and i wouldn't be in.

I think because of the relief i felt, I was able to get a few hours sleep this morning but the panic is already starting up again and I am shaking as i write this. All i want to do is give it up. I just want to email them now and tell them i'm not coming back but i'm supposed to give a month's notice. If i give it up I'll have no money coming in. I don't know what to do. Anyone have any advice?

Neyite

I am sorry OP but as you are feeling suicidal we have to close this thread.
Please contact one or more of the organisations below and ask them for help.
We will also pass details of this thread to the user turn2me.org who will be in touch offering their services to help you through this difficult time.

From our charter:

Depression / Mental Health
http://www.irish-counselling.ie/
http://www.dublinsamaritans.ie/
http://www.mentalhealthireland.ie/
http://www.grow.ie/
http://www.aware.ie/
http://www.shineonline.ie/
http://www.recover.ie/ (Schizophrenia Ireland)

Suicide
http://www.nosp.ie/ (national suicide prevention)
1Life Suicide Prevention Helpline - 1800 247 100
http://www.pieta.ie/
https://www.turn2me.org/ - registered rep on boards contactable at turn2me.org

turn2me.org

Hello Shaky Sheila,

My name is Eoin O'Shea and I am a counselling psychologist working at Turn2me, an online mental health organisation (www.turn2me.org)

A Boards moderator recently brought a post of yours to my attention (as part of a collaborative support arrangement which Turn2me has with Boards.ie). It really sounds like you're struggling at the moment at work and that this stress is resulting in you not only missing work days at this point, but - far more importantly - has resulted even in you considering suicide as an option.

No job is worth this but perhaps, with a bit of support, you might learn to cope a little better. Other than the services I mention below, I'd like you to consider visiting your GP and telling him/her quite directly just how bad this situation has you feeling over the past while.

What I would also like to say is that we can provide anonymous support at Turn2me should you wish to (a) avail of our support forums, (b) take part in our Online Support Groups which run every day, or (c) use any of the other features at our site.

All of the above are free services for you and other members of the public as our organisation is supported by the HSE through the National Office for Suicide Prevention (NOSP).

Please let me know if you'd have an interest in this - just so that I can touch base with you and make sure you've received this message - and you can then visit our site.

I wish you the very best and hope to hear from you soon,

Eoin

EMail: eoin@turn2me.org