New girl advice

daveymoyesboys

Hey everyone. Never thought i would use a forum like this to express my feelings but i feel i need to let it out before i go completely off the wall.

Anyway i got talking to this girl about 5 months ago on a night out. The 2 of us are students (both 25) so we would socialise in the same bars/clubs. Anyway i got to know this girl in the span of a couple of months from conversations on night outs (she's in the final year of the course i'm doing so we can relate) and about a month ago we shared a kiss on a night out. Since then i have taken her out for dinner and it went great, very nice girl, had another kiss from her and went on my way. We text daily and everything seems to be going fine.

The problem i'm having is i think i care about her ALOT more than she cares about me. It has gotten to the point where i can no longer think straight anymore, my head is a mess. I'm absolutely head over heels with this girl. I've been in a 4 year relationship before and that hasnt even come close to the way i feel about this girl, i literally cannot get her out of my head for a minute. My problem is she is finished college in 2 months and i still have 2 more years left. I dont know where i stand at the moment. I know she plans on moving to Killarney when she leaves college which leaves me with a prediciment. I am fearful of asking for a relationship because of a) she is so busy with final years college at the moment i dont think she wants the hassle of a partner and b) where will it go when the college year is over and she's 100 miles away.

Has anyone any suggestions? It would be a great help.

Tokyo

It sounds like you have built up this situation in your head, where the reality is, you have gone to dinner once, and kissed a couple of times. While there is no predicting what might happen down the line, right now it's very early days, and already you are obsessing over this girl - in your words, you can't get her out of your head for a minute. That's not healthy, im my opinion.

You say that you "think [you] care about her ALOT more than she cares about [you]", but the reality is probably a lot simpler - she sees it as I've described above - a dinner and a couple of kisses, while you are treating the whole thing as destiny fulfilled. . She has given you no hint of wanting a relationship thus far, so it's unfair of you to judge her as not caring about you in the same way that you care about her, where you have placed this girl so highly on a pedestal.

Realistically, the only way you are going to get closure on this is by talking to the girl. I wouldn't tell her what you told us here, as I think it would scare most people off. But I think you should ask her if she sees whatever you have between you going anywhere, in light of your personal situations in a few months time. It's possible that she may be willing to see what happens when she is in Killarney (it's not a million miles away), but to be honest, I think that you may need to brace yourself for the fact that she just doesn't want the same thing as you do from this. But at least then you'll know where you stand, and will have your answer.

daveymoyesboys

Your absolutely right in everything you said, mike_ie. Very sound advice. I'll just see where it goes and take it from there, wont leave my over-thinking force me into doing or saying anything silly. I have gotten different advice from people but your piece of advice right there is the whole package, exactly what i needed. Thank you.