Staying positive!

Isolt

Hey guys,

I posted here in November as I was expecting my first baby this July. As some of you know that pregnancy sadly ended in a missed miscarriage as confirmed by a scan. I had a D&C in the first week of December. Our Christmas and New Years was very subdued following the loss and we've not really talked much about the future. So you can imagine my surprise when my doctor called to tell me that I am pregnant again :eek:

Complete shock and disbelief!
I tried to ignore it for ages as I have been so scared of suffering another loss but I had a scan last week to date the pregnancy and I was delighted to see a healthy baby with a great heartbeat measuring 8+4. So I've already come further than the last time.
I am still very scared and nervous and have been in between minds about posting as I am fearful. I am 9+2 today and have my booking appointment on March 18th, so not too far away! I know that the risk of miscarriage drops once a heartbeat is found, and I think a heartbeat beyond the 8 week mark is a really good sign but I think it's natural to worry.
Any tips about staying positive and reducing anxiety would be very much appreciated!
Here's hoping this time baby will be fine!

Roesy

Congratulations!! I won't lie, I found it hard to be positive in the early weeks but every week was like another hurdle jumped and as time went on I relaxed a little. I used be petrified before each scan too. My consultant told me that once a heartbeat is seen that the chance of miscarriage diminishes significantly. I found that reassuring. I kept busy too though. When I wasn't feeling sick I made sure to swim/walk/see films etc. I found that if I had too much time on my hands in the early weeks that I was thinking about the what ifs and googling this symptom and that. 12 weeks felt like a massive achievement too. Good luck with it all.

Isolt

Thanks Roesy, you're definitely right about keeping busy and staying away from google! I suppose I don't have too long to wait to get to the 12 week mark, I'll just have to stay active and busy

Merkin

I'm so happy for you Isolt.

The overwhelming majority who have been through the trauma of a miscarriage then go on to have perfectly healthy, full-term pregnancies thereafter. I can understand how your previous experience would shake you but the chances of anything happening this time are slim to none.

The fact that bubba's little heartbeat has been established is an amazingly positive sign. Take each day as it comes. Get lots of sleep, eat well, get some exercise but don't overdo it and before you know it bubba will be here!

Congratulations! xx

pwurple

Congratulations and Good luck Isolt! I had mc last year as well, and am 38 weeks pregnant at the moment. I was a nervous wreck until about 30 weeks, when I knew baby would be a preemie then, rather than a MC. It's stressful. Distraction is all I can advise. Keep yourself occupied with everything and anything in between.

kandr10

Congratulations!
The best thing you can do is stay away from anything baby related on the internet, be it googling a question, browsing, reading forums. You can't forget about being pregnant and you wouldn't want to but you don't want to be obsessive. Every week gets you a week closer to your booking appointment and after that you should hopefully relax.
Best of luck to you and your partner :-)

ncmc

Congrats Isolt, it’s wonderful news for you, I think you may have had a post in PI about this a few weeks ago and I was so happy when you reported back about the positive scan.

There’s no magic bullet to stop the worrying, I worried CONSTANTLY for the first 17-18 weeks despite having three, yes three, private early scans and my 12 week scan! And I hadn’t even been through the trauma of a miscarriage. It’s something people don’t tell you about and I actually found the worry took some of the good out of the pregnancy for me. I found I only really relaxed when I started feeling movement and I also bought a cheap home Doppler so I could listen to the HB at home (although I wouldn’t recommend one of these until you’re much further on – they may not work until you are 16+ weeks and you could worry yourself more if you try and use one and can’t find the HB!) I was told by two different nurses that once you hear the HB, the chance of miscarriage drops to about 2%, so just try and keep this in mind. I found posting here and websites like Rollercoaster were a real help, it’s nice to chat to women who are at the same stage as you and know all the crazy thoughts that are going through your head! There’s nothing anyone can say that will stop you worrying, but just know that you’re not alone. Congrats again!

detoxkid

Congrats to you, great news! Like the others have said I found the best thing is to keep busy. I took swimming lessons , if you have a block of six lessons for example the time goes quite fast. I also started acupuncture to try and stop worrying.. Every week for the from when I found I was pregnant and roughly every 2 weeks since then. I find it brilliant. For me there was always another milestone to work towards, 8 weeks the 12 weeks then the 20 week scan, then 24 weeks. Anyway I'm 27 weeks now and touch wood all is great. Wishing you the very best of luck and a very healthy pregnancy x

Isolt

Thanks guys, I'm just taking it one week at a time and hoping for the best. Glad to know I'm not the only one who found pregnancy stressful after a loss though, it helps to know that other women felt the same way and that it had a happy ending for them.