If you could find out if your partner was The One - Would You?

How so Joe

I just watched this film, TiMER, the basic premise of which is that you can get a timer implanted in your wrist which counts down to the time you'll meet your soulmate. And when you make eye contact with them, it beeps and flashes.

So! I was wondering about this!

If you could find out if your current partner was the one, would you?
Would you get a timer which counts down to when you'll meet your soulmate?
Do you even believe in soulmates?

Personally, I think the idea of soulmates is bull, so the first two questions are moot, but leaving that aside for a moment, I don't think I'd get a TiMER, because where's the fun in knowing? Half the fun of relationships (especially in the beginning) is not knowing, and figuring out as you're going along.

But what do you think, AH-ers?

How many of you reckon your soulmate is yer ma?

lilymc

I don't believe in soul mates. However, the second I met my other half something just clicked.. chemistry, whatever name you could give to, I liked him from the moment I met him.

As for the timer, if I'd been asked this as an 18 year old I probably would have said yes, just because it almost gives the impression that you're guaranteed to meet someone so until then you can have lots of fun and not have to think about finding someone.

Now however, If things didn't work with my other half. I wouldn't want to know anything about my future. You play the card your dealt in life the best you can, spending your life waiting and wondering what could happen will drive you insane.

ManofStraw

What if your timer stopped when you met your soul mate ... but their timer didn't.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

I don't believe in soul mates. I reckon you could be equally as happy with a lot of different people.

There's a certain number of different personalities/categories people fall into, and you could meet and be happy with any one of them from your chosen category.

Gospel, according to the bunny..

How so Joe

ManofStraw wrote: »

What if your timer stopped when you met your soul mate ... but their timer didn't.

I think soul mates are probably surjective, like in maths, that everyone has a distinct partner who's linked to them and only them? But I dunno, this is all hypothetical!

lilymc, if you could check if your current partner was The One (with spooky capitals), though, would you??

The Narrator

ManofStraw wrote: »

What if your timer stopped when you met your soul mate ... but their timer didn't.

This was my first thought.

"You're the one."

"Oooo, no. Sorry."

Also, what able people who take the "one" to mean anyone with a pulse?
Do they have multiple watches?

How so Joe

Duracell Bunny wrote: »

I don't believe in soul mates. I reckon you could be equally as happy with a lot of different people.

There's a certain number of different personalities/categories people fall into, and you could meet and be happy with any one of them from your chosen category.

Gospel, according to the bunny..

TBH, I'm of the same opinion, I think in a world of 7 billion people, the idea that you can only be truly happy with one person is bullcrap, but for the sake of the discussion, would you check, if you could?

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

How so Joe wrote: »

TBH, I'm of the same opinion, I think in a world of 7 billion people, the idea that you can only be truly happy with one person is bullcrap, but for the sake of the discussion, would you check, if you could?

Feckin sure I would. What's the alternative, blow a wad of notes on drinks and dinner, only to find out she's a geebag?! Sorry, love, is that the time, God I better go....

rustedtrumpet

Does it work with animals aswell? Me and my dog are pretttty good mates to be honest.

How so Joe

Duracell Bunny wrote: »

Feckin sure I would. What's the alternative, blow a wad of notes on drinks and dinner, only to find out she's a geebag?! Sorry, love, is that the time, God I better go....

Cynical. Very cynical!!
I like it!

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

How so Joe wrote: »

Cynical. Very cynical!!
I like it!

*shrugs*

zetalambda

Duracell Bunny wrote: »

I don't believe in soul mates. I reckon you could be equally as happy with a lot of different people.

There's a certain number of different personalities/categories people fall into, and you could meet and be happy with any one of them from your chosen category.

Gospel, according to the bunny..

Only because you've never met one. I always thought the same, that you could have multiple "soul mates" that were people of a similar personality/background. How wrong I was! Trust me, if your lucky, you'll meet someone who could be from the opposite side of the world, from a completely different culture that's exactly like you in so many ways, someone that thinks just like you, feels the way you do and has experienced many of the up and downs in life that you have but most importantly, someone that you are completely drawn to and who is completely drawn to you.

How so Joe

zetalambda wrote: »

Only because you've never met one. I always thought the same, that you could have multiple "soul mates" that were people of a similar personality/background. How wrong I was! Trust me, if your lucky, you'll meet someone who could be from the opposite side of the world, from a completely different culture that's exactly like you in so many ways, someone that thinks the way you do, feels the way you do and has experienced many of the up and downs that you have.

And if you could find out, within minutes, whether this person truly was your soul mate, would you take the risk that you might be wrong? Or would you rather live in blissful ignorance, trusting that you've picked the right person?

zetalambda

How so Joe wrote: »

And if you could find out, within minutes, whether this person truly was your soul mate, would you take the risk that you might be wrong? Or would you rather live in blissful ignorance, trusting that you've picked the right person?

You know when you've met this person.

How so Joe

zetalambda wrote: »

You know when you've met this person.

That's not what I'm asking. I'm not debating that you've met the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
I'm asking if you could double check, with some sort of technological certainty - would you?

pow wow

+1 on not believing in soulmates. I think it's more about meeting the right person at the right time, and that can happen more than once.

Alf Veedersane

I don't like wearing a watch so I couldn't see myself wearing a timer that wouldn't even tell me the time.

Akrasia

It sounds like a terrible movie OP.
If my wife made me watch this on Netflix It would bump her down a few notches in the old soulmate charts

You should watch V/H/S instead, that film is proper craic

Wibbs

pow wow wrote: »

+1 on not believing in soulmates. I think it's more about meeting the right person at the right time, and that can happen more than once.

This. While the chemical rush that is love may convince us otherwise(that's it's job), unless you're a real outlier for some reason, the vast majority of people have potentially millions of people as "soulmates", the only thing that reduces the number is location access to those millions. The soulmate you would have if you were born in Karachi is going to be a different soulmate than the one you'd have in Kells.

How so Joe

Akrasia wrote: »

It sounds like a terrible movie OP.
If my wife made me watch this on Netflix It would bump her down a few notches in the old soulmate charts

You should watch V/H/S instead, that film is proper craic

It was actually a disappointing film alright,the only way I felt I could salvage it was by making a thread about it!

Wibbs wrote: »

This. While the chemical rush that is love may convince us otherwise(that's it's job), unless you're a real outlier for some reason, the vast majority of people have potentially millions of people as "soulmates", the only thing that reduces the number is location access to those millions. The soulmate you would have if you were born in Karachi is going to be a different soulmate than the one you'd have in Kells.

I agree on the first point, but on Karachi/Kells, surely you would be a different person then, and so obviously your soulmate would be different?

Carrie Madshaw

I hate this "The One" thing - did anyone ever say this before Friends made it popular? Please stop saying it.

pow wow

Carrie Madshaw wrote: »

I hate this "The One" thing - did anyone ever say this before Friends made it popular? Please stop saying it.

I think Disney copyrighted it long before it appeared in Friends, considering how often it's trotted out in their movies.

I believe in monogamy and staying with one person, just not that if things to tits up with them that's your allocation of 'ones' gone!

--Kaiser--

The One?!
Soul mates!?
****ing LOL.
Even if there was only one person for everyone, the odds of you finding them would be astronomically high

The Backwards Man

My soulmate is a goatherder in rural Tajikistan apparently.

She can fcuking stay there.

Duggy747

I don't believe in soul mates, by the way, just wanted to quote Highlander :pac:

I would have been sceptical of the idea of a soul mate that is until I met him aged 45, it wasn't romantic stars didn't collide ect it just felt like you were home and a deep sense of now I know what the meaning of life is, I genuinely doubt there are thousands of men I could have felt like that with, however I am sure there are thousands of men with which I could have had a happy successful long term relationship with, in that situation while being happy with each it is not sole mates that's not the same thing.

mariaalice

mariaalice wrote: »

I would have been sceptical of the idea of a soul mate that is until I met him aged 45, it wasn't romantic stars didn't collide ect it just felt like you were home and a deep sense of now I know what the meaning of life is, I genuinely doubt there are thousands of men I could have felt like that with, however I am sure there are thousands of men with which I could have had a happy successful long term relationship with, in that situation while being happy with each it is not sole mates that's not the same thing.

On the contrary Mariaalice, that is actually very, very romantic.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

zetalambda wrote: »

Only because you've never met one. I always thought the same, that you could have multiple "soul mates" that were people of a similar personality/background. How wrong I was! Trust me, if your lucky, you'll meet someone who could be from the opposite side of the world, from a completely different culture that's exactly like you in so many ways, someone that thinks just like you, feels the way you do and has experienced many of the up and downs in life that you have but most importantly, someone that you are completely drawn to and who is completely drawn to you.

Tbh the only way I can see myself spending my whole life with one person is if they were my cell mate.

burnhardlanger

ManofStraw wrote: »

What if your timer stopped when you met your soul mate ... but their timer didn't.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=1174

The Hollywood version would have you believe it only happens to slim good looking people and you will be adored for the rest of you life messy reality and human frailty will never get in the way, lump imperfect middle age people need not apply.

Having given out about Hollywood:p I have to say I love this it is from Jerry Maguire.

Jerry:

Hello? Hello. I'm lookin' for my wife.
Wait. Okay...okay...okay.
If this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen.
I'm not letting you get rid of me. How about that?
This used to be my specialty. You know, I was good in a living room.


They'd send me in there, and I'd do it alone. And now I just...
But tonight, our little project, our company had a very big night

... a very, very big night.
But it wasn't complete, wasn't nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete,

because I couldn't share it with you.

I couldn't hear your voice or laugh about it with you.

I miss my ... I miss my wife.
We live in a cynical world, a cynical world,

and we work in a business of tough competitors.
I love you. You ... complete me.
And I just had ...



Dorothy:

Shut up. Just shut up.
You had me at hello.
You had me at hello...

Sittingpretty

The idea of a "soulmate" or just one person in the planet destined for another is complete and utter bollix.

Reserved only for women who drive pink cars with eyelashes on the headlights and those that think Cecilia Ahern is a great author.

Sir Arthur Daley

Its only foolishness thinking there is only one soul mate for everyone, those people that think that need to socialise outside their rural villages and meet new people.

mariaalice

mariaalice wrote: »

Having given out about Hollywood:p I have to say I love this it is from Jerry Maguire.

See, that does nothing for me because it's so over the top, so in line with what we are supposed to think romance is.

But what you wrote here -

'... it wasn't romantic stars didn't collide ect it just felt like you were home and a deep sense of now I know what the meaning of life is'

- really touches me because it's an extraordinary thing that came in an ordinary moment. I think most of the really significant things that happen us, happen in the ordinary moments, but we don't notice because there's no fanfare, no fireworks, no background music. It's not a grandly overstated event, and it's all the more real and affecting because of it.

I hope the two of you always remain as happy and as at home as you are.

BraziliaNZ

In fairness though, with my current partner, I really would find it extremely hard to think there are lots of other women out there in different parts of the world that I could have the same relationship and understanding with. The main reason we're so similar is because of where we're from and where we grew up. I know most of you on boards met your American partners while playing World of Warcraft, and I've been with my fair share of foreigners, but being from the same place and having that familiarity and no culture clash makes a huuuuuge difference to me but it took until meeting my current partner to realise this.