Have I made a mistake?

LegacyUser

This isn't a major issue for me but I'd just like to see what other people think of this. I met a guy on a dating site and we were dating for a couple of months. He seemed really keen and I really liked him and we get on so well when we're together.

But lately I haven't seen all that much of him (twice in the last month). He texts me as much as he did at the start but he always seems to be busy. Yesterday I asked him to go out next week and he said he was going home for the weekend but he could meet me on Sunday (he's been home for the last few weekends). I replied and said I'd like to but that if he'd rather not it's fine, I'd just like to know. He said that he likes me but that he doesn't want a relationship right now but he'd be happy to meet up with me. So I told him that I'd prefer to bow out now. We've decided to stay friends.

My question here is whether I was too hasty in ending things or did I do myself a favour in the long run?

On the one hand I genuinely believe him that he's very busy and doesn't have all that much time but on the other hand I've always thought that when people say they're "not looking for a relationship right now" it just means that they don't want a relationship with you.

Penny Tration

Presumably you're doing online dating to date with the intention of possibly forming a relationship, all things going well?

If that's the case, you weren't too hasty. He specifically said he doesn't want a relationship, so you got out at the right time, rather than be messed about with casual,half arsed dating.

MugMugs

itisover wrote: »

He said that he likes me but that he doesn't want a relationship right now but he'd be happy to meet up with me.

As man this translates to me as.

"I want sex but really, I'm just not that into you"

If he really genuinely wanted to be with you, then he would be.

maria34

Trust me if someone wants to be with you, he finds time for you. And he can be the busiest man in the world.

I guess he had some fun and isnt in love with you.

LegacyUser

I've always thought that when people say they're "not looking for a relationship right now" it just means that they don't want a relationship with you.

Yes I would agree with this too.

Some girls stay in 'relationships' like this for years and wonder why it goes nowhere. But the guy said at the start, he didn't want a relationship.
So save yourself years of heartache and bow out now.

Merkin

I think you should be proud of yourself.You asked the hard question and although you might not have liked the answer you absolutely did the right thing. I wouldn't bother meeting with the guy, in fact I wouldn't bother being friends either as I wouldn't see the point.

Onwards and upwards girl!

Geomy

Move on like I have to.
There's lots of good people out there...
It's hard but you're worth it. ....

Geomy

Move on like I have to.
There's lots of good people out there...
It's hard but you're worth it. ....

Stavro Mueller

Being "busy" is the oldest excuse in the book. If someone is genuinely busy and is interested in you, they will make time to see you.

LegacyUser

Op here, thanks for all the replies. They just confirmed what I thought already! It sucks because I really liked him but sure there's obviously someone even more dreamy for me out there!

Merkin

itisover wrote: »

Op here, thanks for all the replies. They just confirmed what I thought already! It sucks because I really liked him but sure there's obviously someone even more dreamy for me out there!

Of course there is! And that's why I said to sever ties and forget about any kind of friendship as having any semblance of a relationship with him will probably prevent you from meeting someone AMAZINGLY dreamy!:)