Freak out in new house

LegacyUser

I moved house recently - I'm female and there's 2 guys in the house. I'm generally a quiet person but when I was moving in my stuff I saw a girl go in the house ahead of me - for some bizarre reason I got real nervous. I met the 2 guys once before and they are sound. With the girlfriend there it's like I freaked out!! Why did this happen?! She seemed nice but I just felt do nervous with her there. I felt jumpy and twitchy and basically just dropped my stuff and ran literally!! I've lived with guys before and their girlfriends would be there - no problem. Maybe it's because it was my second time in the house and hadnt met her before and felt awkward with all my bags/stuff! What happened me? I can't freak out every time she calls over - she's prob a lovely girl.

ABajaninCork

Have you tried saying 'Hi' to her? The poor girl must've thought there was something wrong with her!

freshpopcorn

Being honest.
I don't really get your issue.
Is it that you have a problem with people having people over unannounced?

LegacyUser

No idea waft was wrong with me - maybe I thought she wouldn't like me moving in with her boyfriend or something, but I never felt that like that in other houses. I guess I just felt a bit over whelmed moving in and didn't know any of them

Typer Monkey

Do you have a problem with social anxiety or anxiety in general? If so it's probably worth having a chat to your GP about it. The situation you described is not one that would usually cause a panicked/anxiety reaction, maybe a little awkwardness at a stretch as you are all strangers but your reaction does sound a little atypical

I don't want to sound accusatory, and there's nothing wrong with it if you do, but maybe is it that you fancy one/both of the guys, and feel a bit weird/guilty about it?

LegacyUser

true-or-false wrote: »

I don't want to sound accusatory, and there's nothing wrong with it if you do, but maybe is it that you fancy one/both of the guys,
and feel a bit weird/guilty about it?

Well yes he is a good looking guy but I don't fancy him, I think. I just felt self conscious moving in. Plus I suppose the girl was good looking too so maybe I felt inferior a bit. Yes I am usually quiet and shy I suppose

cloudatlas

Well you were expecting to meet one person not two so if you have social anxiety issues I can see how that would be unsettling.

Remember O.P. you're entitled to be there, it's your place so try not to feel less than anyone else. I would carry on normally and just smooth over the issue, don't make any reference to it, be as friendly as you can be.

sligoface

Moving is stressful, especially moving in with strangers, and then seeing another person you weren't expecting when you just arrived and hadn't settled in yet. I could see how some people could get anxious in that situation, but I wouldn't keep worrying. Once you are more comfortable I'd say you will not be as nervous and you will get along with them and her as well.

ZeroThreat

Maybe arrange a foursome to break the ice? Seems like a good idea to me.

Taltos

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Taltos

LegacyUser

Hajj vul wrote: »

I moved house recently - I'm female and there's 2 guys in the house. I'm generally a quiet person but when I was moving in my stuff I saw a girl go in the house ahead of me - for some bizarre reason I got real nervous. I met the 2 guys once before and they are sound. With the girlfriend there it's like I freaked out!! Why did this happen?! She seemed nice but I just felt do nervous with her there. I felt jumpy and twitchy and basically just dropped my stuff and ran literally!! I've lived with guys before and their girlfriends would be there - no problem. Maybe it's because it was my second time in the house and hadnt met her before and felt awkward with all my bags/stuff! What happened me? I can't freak out every time she calls over - she's prob a lovely girl.

It sounds from your post that this was an unexpected reaction even to yourself<mod snip>. In that case it sounds like a very excessive reaction - and tbh, <mod snip>, the girl is definitely going to feel weirded out by it. I think you should try really hard to fit in and be accommodating, and friendly to this girl. Yes, it's going to be your home too - but you really can't behave like that and expect other housemates to be cool with it.