Send This back to your Spam Emails !

finix

It totally confuses them and the reply's are hilarious !

Dear Sir, I am an Uruk of Mordor, charged with the discovery of a number of valuable treasures within Moria. It has come to my notice that the mithril hoard previously owned by Ori of the land of Moria has been found by one of our cave-trolls. Under our laws, the hoard will be shared between our lord Sauron and the local Balrog, but so far neither knows the extent of the treasure. Sir, I come to you as a respectful businessperson in order that we may derive some profit ourselves from this venture, I would wish that I could arrange for the transfer of half of the find to yourself, costing roughly 20,000 silver pennies. From this amount, I will then arrange for a further such that 25% remains your own, 5% goes for sundry costs (including hire of strong Rohan horses for use in transportation), 5% is given in bribe to the cave troll to ensure the quantity reported to our respective Lords is adjusted, 65% belongs to myself and my fellow Orcs. In order that this be accomplished, I ask only that you provide details of: Your willingness to participate in this venture, Confirmation that you will not speak of this venture to anyone else, or wear any magic rings, Your race and land of residence, The location of your local Palantir or identity of your preferred message-carrying bird or beast, Your given name, and any name you are known by in the Western lands, The number of ponies you possess. I look forward to your returning correspondence, which can be whispered to any passing magpie. I trust that you will ensure that no other dark feathered birds come to hear of this transaction. Fielding Mellish

myshirt

Is there a shorter alternative?

Casshern88

Most spam emails would be automated programs chances are no one would see your reply 90% of the time

My name is URL

Easier just to ignore them really. And replying to them at all just verifies that you have an active e-mail so they sell your details on to other criminal outfits

But hey.. you win in your own way

laugh

Casshern88 wrote: »

Most spam emails would be automated programs chances are no one would see your reply 90% of the time

More like 99.9999%

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

How do you know it confuses them? What a waste of time. You'd be better of using that drill she bought you for Christmas to do a few jobs about the house.
Seriously, do you really think they read replies or , if they do, would pay any heed to that drivel of a reply?

The Backwards Man

Casshern88 wrote: »

Most spam emails would be automated programs chances are no one would see your reply 90% of the time

I think he means scam emails as opposed to viagra sellers or cock enlargers.

Randomfriend

I assume all the Nigerian princes read their emails, and guessed that was the sort of spam the OP was getting at. Their mails would be pointless if they weren't reading replys would they not..

J_E

Jamir Itchy Sunlight wrote: »

How do you know it confuses them? What a waste of time. You'd be better of using that drill she bought you for Christmas to do a few jobs about the house.
Seriously, do you really think they read replies or , if they do, would pay any heed to that drivel of a reply?

Of course scammers do. There have been times where they'd stay on the chase for months with a person if they think there's going to be a reward at the end.

Hedgemeister

Anyway, those feckin' Rohan horses aren't all they're cracked up to be.
Now the TROJAN'S, well, there's real horses for you!

biko

Too much work, if it's all the same to you I'll just keep deleting them.