Awkward question psychotherapy

jungatheart

I've been doing psychotherapy for about a year and it's really helped me with panic, anxiety, alcohol issues and been easier on myself. Many of the issues are a combination of a dysfunctional upbringing and a violent rape about 10 years ago. I trust my therapist completely, they've taught me about boundaries and have never judged me and always been very kind. In past two months a lot of issues around sex and sexuality have come up for me and I don't know how to start the conversation with my therapist - it's such a taboo subject in society and I know I would feel better if I could talk to them about it as I feel it's a tied in with shame, saying what I want and feeling valued. So my questions are - is this an awkward topic for therapists ? How do I bring it up ?

JuliusCaesar

jungatheart wrote: »

So my questions are - is this an awkward topic for therapists ?

No. Sex and sexuality would be a frequent topic to arise in therapy.

jungatheart wrote: »

How do I bring it up ?

Anyway you like. You could say it at the beginning of a session: "I'd like to talk about...." or at the end, or hand the therapist a note, or whatever way makes you comfortable. It's up to the therapist to make it comfortable to talk about.

Sexuality is a major part of who we are, as adults.

jungatheart

Thanks that's good to hear and it makes sense but all these taboos in the head get active sometimes - I'm writing it all out at the moment as it's probably intensified things a bit having a break of a few weeks from therapy over the Christmas holidays and I'll be seeing therapist in about a week. I think I will just say at the start I have these things to say and it would be good for me to read out what I've written out and talk about it then. Then hopefully I won't want the ground to open up and swallow me - so far, therapist has been completely steady and calm which helps, except once I noticed they cried a little when I told them about the rape but that made me trust a bit more as it was like empathy for me.

neemish

My therapist says that there is nothing we can't talk about in session- i'd presume that most if not all therapists are of this viewpoint.

I've written the difficult stuff down in the past and handed it over. It has worked pretty well.

The other option is to say, theres something i'd like to talk about but I can only tell you a little about it today. Also works well.


Best of luck! Therapy must be working if you can recognise your own issues

jungatheart

Thanks - I never thought of it that way - that it must be working if I'm starting to see my own issues.

My therapist has said we can talk about everything and nothing is taboo and we do free association sometimes if I get stuck so I'm sure it'll be fine - 20 seconds of courage to start getting the words out

I found transference easier to talk about than this - I suppose taboos about sex are so deeply rooted - sometimes I feel like I have a little censorship board working away in my head like the numbskulls and I'd love if they'd take a little holiday !!