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New Relationship - Now he's moving away!

  • 02-01-2014 10:32pm
    #1
    Timmythedonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31 ✭


    I've been seeing someone I met online for about 4 months - all is going great! BUT he's been offered a job far away (about 5 and a half hours drive away!) Were both willing to give it a go but I'm just worried about the distance as there are no direct flight's or train links so it's just the long drive and he already know's he will be working hard and may only be off every 3 - 4 weekends per month. He's talked about not taking the job but I have encouraged him as it's a great opportunity! He and I have kid's so I'm worried when he's off I may not get to see him and visa versa - Does anyone have any advise???


Comments

  • #2
    GreeBo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 27,370 ✭✭✭✭GreeBo


    I think firstly he needs to decide about the job, without taking your relationship into account...4 months is still pretty soon and I think there is a danger of him holding that against you.
    After he has thought about that he can think about it in terms of the relationship and factor that in.

    Is it a long term job or a temporary move?
    Lots of people do long distance relationships...it really depends on the people involved and the effort they put in I guess.

    Best of luck!


  • #3
    dannyc31
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 309 ✭✭dannyc31


    i agree 4 months is not an awfully long time. this isnt the worst long distance situation either. he's not moving to another country so its definitely possible to keep things going. if its a big opportunity i think he needs to take it and try work a timetable to get to see you as much as is possible. it will either go two ways. 1. the distance thing will make your time together all that more special and you will look forward to seeing each other & grow closer together or 2. you will grow apart and the relationship will just fizzle out, which will mean it just was'nt meant to be.


  • #4
    Victoria Fortescue
    Closed Accounts Posts: 95 ✭✭Victoria Fortescue


    Timmythedonkey wrote: »
    I've been seeing someone I met online for about 4 months - all is going great! BUT he's been offered a job far away (about 5 and a half hours drive away!) Were both willing to give it a go but I'm just worried about the distance as there are no direct flight's or train links so it's just the long drive and he already know's he will be working hard and may only be off every 3 - 4 weekends per month. He's talked about not taking the job but I have encouraged him as it's a great opportunity! He and I have kid's so I'm worried when he's off I may not get to see him and visa versa - Does anyone have any advise???

    Time will tell if this can work, but I'm not sure I could handle it. The earlier months in a relationship are about building a solid foundation for it, so this may be damaging in the longer term.


  • #5
    Mr. Incognito
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    This is a fantastic test. Everything is amazing after four months but if you are willing to make it work it is a great source of stability in the future. I met my current Oh and five months later she had four months away. we made it work and live together now and couldn't be happier


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