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Finding 'Dodgy' Money

  • 06-12-2013 6:30pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,449 ✭✭✭


    Having seen the situation in such dramas as Breaking Bad, No Country for Old Men, A Simple Plan etc. it always got me thinking, in reality, if you found it, how would you go about keeping 'dodgy' money in a way that nobody else (or at least the taxman/police/bad guys) knew about it?

    Is it possible if you don't have criminal associations?

    If you happened to have found Walter White's stash while in that part of the world would Las Vegas offer any kind of a get out option?

    Obviously, for the sake of the argument, 'tell the cops' is not an option.


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,516 ✭✭✭wazky


    I would use it for the notes I lost from my Monopoly game.


  • Site Banned Posts: 141 ✭✭BeerFear


    Shove it up my arse


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,534 ✭✭✭SV


    I'd just keep it and live a normal lifestyle 'saving' a bit more than I normally would until I had it all put away.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    There are numerous ways of hiding dirty money, just drop in to your local FF td and they will put you in the right direction...:P


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    megadodge wrote: »
    would Las Vegas offer any kind of a get out option?
    Yeah. It's called the Clark County Detention Center.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,668 ✭✭✭Corkbah


    depends on if the bills were stained or not.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Corkbah wrote: »
    depends on if the bills were stained or not.

    You could always launder them. :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 339 ✭✭rustedtrumpet


    Young lads bury wads of notes in lunchboxes, in the local park from selling chronic, for safe keeping...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,804 ✭✭✭Sir Osis of Liver.


    Remember reading years ago about an Arab businessman who left a million pounds behind him in a phonebox in a suitcase in London.
    Needless to say it was gone when he remembered it.
    Fcukin eejit.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 71,802 ✭✭✭✭Ted_YNWA


    Ill mind it & give u €10 a week for the rest of your life so it won't raise any red flags.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Den_M


    Young lads bury wads of notes in lunchboxes, in the local park from selling chronic, for safe keeping...

    is that from a song or something?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    Just keep it in a room in the house that no one else is allowed into. The forbidden room. Only you have the key to.

    Live as normal a life as possible, do what you want, go where you want within reason so as not to raise any red flags.

    Make up some bull crap tale about a compo claim or something, hence why you don't work.

    Couldn't be too difficult I'd imagine.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,449 ✭✭✭megadodge


    Just keep it in a room in the house that no one else is allowed into. The forbidden room. Only you have the key to.

    Live as normal a life as possible, do what you want, go where you want within reason so as not to raise any red flags.

    Make up some bull crap tale about a compo claim or something, hence why you don't work.

    Couldn't be too difficult I'd imagine.

    And if you want to do something big, like clear your mortgage, how do you explain that?

    I don't think it's easy at all, unless you're very disciplined, but then what's the point having it if you can't really do anything worthwhile with it?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,689 ✭✭✭Karl Stein


    I'd buy a massive gold-plated Cadillac and huge fur coat. Nobody could be that stupid so nobody would suspect me.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,221 ✭✭✭NuckingFacker


    megadodge wrote: »
    And if you want to do something big, like clear your mortgage, how do you explain that?

    I don't think it's easy at all, unless you're very disciplined, but then what's the point having it if you can't really do anything worthwhile with it?
    "Gambling on horses" seems to be the recource for high level bull5hitters. On the other hand, why not just keep on paying it as per usual, bit by bit, except from "The STash".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭DazMarz


    Gambling "winnings". It's amazing how quickly you'd be able to launder a lot of money through bookies, casinos, online gambling, etc. Throwing money onto "sure-thing" bets a lot would incur some losses, but in the long run it could help explain away a lot of things.

    I think it'd be more the private knowledge of security of it that would be great; you'd have to keep the day job and keep a relatively normal life, but you'd know in your heart that if things did go tits up, there would be some sort of a safety net there for you.

    That said, if anyone wants a harsh lesson in how finding dirty money can go tits up for the finders, watch A Simple Plan with Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton in it. Grim...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,808 ✭✭✭Stained Class


    Corkbah wrote: »
    depends on if the bills were stained or not.

    Obviously, I wouldn't care about the 'stained' aspect.

    Just invest it in Art. Nobody knows what it's worth & if somebody does, just say 'it's a copy'.

    Simple

    Of course you could 'do a Bertie' & say you won it on the horses.

    No Class in that though..........


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,777 ✭✭✭worded


    A common scam in Russia for tourists ...

    A wallet drops from the pocket of someone in front of u on a busy street

    Three options

    1- run after and tell the person.
    Why thank you. Checks wallet and asks where is the rest?
    What? Yes there was more € there. You get marched to the nearest bank link by him and his mates

    2 - you grab the wallet and run
    See 1 above

    3 - you ignore wallet
    Clever you


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,777 ✭✭✭worded


    In true life that plumber working on ailesbury rd found 25k + under a bath. Remember him?
    He turned the € over

    Best given to the Balbriggan police so they can share the wealth. Remember them !


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,449 ✭✭✭megadodge


    "Gambling on horses" seems to be the recource for high level bull5hitters. On the other hand, why not just keep on paying it as per usual, bit by bit, except from "The STash".

    Because I want the b*stards to get as little as possible from me, so the sooner I pay it back the less they get.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,449 ✭✭✭megadodge


    DazMarz wrote: »
    Gambling "winnings". It's amazing how quickly you'd be able to launder a lot of money through bookies, casinos, online gambling, etc. Throwing money onto "sure-thing" bets a lot would incur some losses, but in the long run it could help explain away a lot of things.

    I think it'd be more the private knowledge of security of it that would be great; you'd have to keep the day job and keep a relatively normal life, but you'd know in your heart that if things did go tits up, there would be some sort of a safety net there for you.

    That said, if anyone wants a harsh lesson in how finding dirty money can go tits up for the finders, watch A Simple Plan with Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton in it. Grim...

    In relation to the gambling side, that's why I asked if you were on holidays in the US and found it, then went to Vegas, but you had to be back home in 7 days, how exactly would you 'gamble' it in that timeframe? And then do you open a bank account there rather than try to carry it through the airport security?

    I mentioned 'A Simple Plan' in my OP as it was one of the films that got me thinking about the whole subject.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,730 ✭✭✭✭Fred Swanson


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,324 ✭✭✭BillyMitchel


    Hide it in a safe and troll After Hours. The craic be mighty.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,957 ✭✭✭two wheels good


    According to this article some people do their laundering at a Fixed Odds Betting Terminal. (Do they exist in Ireland?)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,485 ✭✭✭dj jarvis


    buy bitcoins - sorted


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,730 ✭✭✭✭Fred Swanson


    This post has been deleted.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,730 ✭✭✭✭Fred Swanson


    This post has been deleted.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,874 ✭✭✭padma


    set up small business in your local city, undercut a business in a niche market, expand to different areas of the city, corner the market, then go national, once the stores are pulling in profit etc, you just keep laundering money, easy peasy really.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,053 ✭✭✭wilkie2006




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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,036 ✭✭✭Ficheall


    This post has been deleted.
    Has anyone ever asked you how much money you were bringing through security? I'd imagine it's fairly easy.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,730 ✭✭✭✭Fred Swanson


    This post has been deleted.


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