What is an alcoholic?

Flippyfloppy

What do posters consider to be an alcoholic?

Do you need to drink daily to be one?

Does 'just' binge drinking at the weekend count?

Sunnyisland

I will just offer my own perspective. I resisted and avoided admitting I was an alcoholic for years. My REAL issue with facing my alcoholism was not the "label" that so many people talk about. It was the realization that alcoholics CANNOT safely drink, and there for the only "solution" would be to stop drinking.

I didn't want to stop drinking.

So I prolonged the misery for a very long time.

Much to my amazement, finally accepting that I am an alcohlic who cannot drink safely, ever, was the beginning of my freedom from it. Once I stopped tryng to figure out how to control the uncontrollable, the air started to clear.

Getting sober isn't easy, but it's by far the best thing I've done in a very long time. My "stress" wasn't my problem. My alcohol addiction was my problem.

Only you can know what's true for you. I can only relay my own experience

Sunnyisland

One of the many other answers...

An alcoholic is a man or a woman who suffers from alcoholism - they have a distinct physical desire to consume alcohol beyond their capacity to control it, regardless of all rules of common sense.

Binge drinking occurs when a man consumes more than eight units of alcohol and a woman consumes over six units in one sitting. Drinking large amounts of alcohol now-and-again is worse for the heath than frequently drinking small quantities.


The signs of alcoholism and alcohol abuse are very similar, and are often just a question of degree or intensity.

Typically, the last person to be aware that he/she has a serious drinking problem is the alcoholic himself/herself - they are in denial.

The World Health Organization (WHO) says there are at least 140 million alcoholics in the world; unfortunately, the majority of them are not treated.

lilymc

I don't think you have to drink daily to be an alcoholic. I believe alcoholism is when you start drinking then you can't stop drinking and it seemingly takes over for a period of time.
I believe this because I have experienced this from an immediate member of my family who doesn't drink daily and has managed to hold jobs (although changing every few years maybe due to their problem) but occasionally maybe every two months some years and every 4-6 months other years they would go on an everyday drinking binge for about a fortnight then resume their normal life as if nothing happened. This to me is someone who has an alcohol problem yet doesn't drink everyday.
I would dread weddings or christenings i knew if said person started drinking the fortnight of binge drinking was likely to happen.
Although this behavior would not affect a family in the same way a person drinking everyday would it still did affect the family and of course was dangerous for the person in question.

jadun

If you dont drink on weekdays and only drink on weekends you can still be an alcoholoic and this happens with most alchoholics. I know people who can't go with a weekend without been sloshed. One lad went the weekend and then he was in the pub Monday and tuesday night. hammered. Then of course there are severe alcoholics who cant go a day without it.

sturdyhairy

For me, an alcoholic is an illness. A person who is suffering from this kind has a distinct desire to consume alcohol beyond their capacity to control it.

jadun

sturdyhairy wrote: »

For me, an alcoholic is an illness. A person who is suffering from this kind has a distinct desire to consume alcohol beyond their capacity to control it.

How Hairy are you? Walter White Hairy or Twink Hairy?

Wattle

When it comes to myself I don't even bother with labels like alcoholic. All I know is that my drinking was always extreme. It caused me and other people misery. It also caused a lingering depression that I could never get rid of. I didn't drink every day but I did binge drink. Every episode of drinking was designed to blot out my own misery but of course it only made my long-term state of mind worse. After ten years without I find that drinking is something I think about very rarely. I don't go to AA. I don't make a big deal about it. It's just something that I used to do and by giving it up many positive things have flowed from there.

Amazingfun

My understanding of alcoholism is that it's a three pronged illness (not a disease as we term it ie: Cancer, etc, but rather an illness one can recover from): mental, physical, both of these resulting in a kind of spiritual destruction. That's essentially AA's definition, with heavy emphasis on what happens once one starts to drink: can you stop after three, or do you find it impossible to control the amount you ingest once you start? Also, if you've been off it for ages and want to stay off--can you? Or does the head keep knawing at you?

The main problem (ingesting alcohol) can be arrested by not drinking, but it's the head and the heart that can often still lead one back to the bottle, so for me it's best to recognize it as the peculiar 'serious something' it is, while not making myself into some kind of victim in the process. One of my real pet peeves is hearing someone who drank herself into a mess try to excuse it away with " but I have a disease", lol.
Still, many of us Irish do have a kind of physical sensitivity to it, but it's good too to remember no one ever held us down and threw the drinks down our throats.

I guess the best way to evaluate ones drinking is to make a "pro" and "con" list of how drinking shows up in your day to day life.

My "con" list was pages long and the "pro" rather short, yet I still drank for a long while before waving the white flag of surrender

Carpet diem

Amazingfun wrote: »

My understanding of alcoholism is that it's a three pronged illness (not a disease as we term it ie: Cancer, etc, but rather an illness one can recover from): mental, physical, both of these resulting in a kind of spiritual destruction. That's essentially AA's definition, with heavy emphasis on what happens once one starts to drink: can you stop after three, or do you find it impossible to control the amount you ingest once you start? Also, if you've been off it for ages and want to stay off--can you? Or does the head keep knawing at you?

The main problem (ingesting alcohol) can be arrested by not drinking, but it's the head and the heart that can often still lead one back to the bottle, so for me it's best to recognize it as the peculiar 'serious something' it is, while not making myself into some kind of victim in the process. One of my real pet peeves is hearing someone who drank herself into a mess try to excuse it away with " but I have a disease", lol.
Still, many of us Irish do have a kind of physical sensitivity to it, but it's good too to remember no one ever held us down and threw the drinks down our throats.

I guess the best way to evaluate ones drinking is to make a "pro" and "con" list of how drinking shows up in your day to day life.

My "con" list was pages long and the "pro" rather short, yet I still drank for a long while before waving the white flag of surrender

I like the last part as that is the way I think of it. I have cut out drink and life is changing , I'm doing better in work , getting on better with people, coping better and the list goes on. Whenever i drank things were just awful, everything was a struggle.

So what I'm saying is if you notice life is a good bit better without drink, then you have your answer.

hubba

'So what I'm saying is if you notice life is a good bit better without drink, then you have your answer.'

That's it in a nutshell for me too, Carpet Diem.

emmabrighton

Me too... the problem with me was that I couldn't cope with life full stop. Going to work was such a struggle. For some stupid reason I thought I drank because I had all these problems in my life, I couldn't see that I had all these problems because I drank. It sounds so flipping obvious now, but back then I thought: "My life is s*!te, I only feel things aren't bad when I drink - so I will drink because it makes me feel better". Never once did I think that all these problems I was having were because of drink.

What a dope!

Amazingfun

emmabrighton wrote: »

Me too... the problem with me was that I couldn't cope with life full stop. Going to work was such a struggle. For some stupid reason I thought I drank because I had all these problems in my life, I couldn't see that I had all these problems because I drank. It sounds so flipping obvious now, but back then I thought: "My life is s*!te, I only feel things aren't bad when I drink - so I will drink because it makes me feel better". Never once did I think that all these problems I was having were because of drink.

What a dope!

Emma, if only you knew how many people die in this country (and others) every single year due to this fatal delusion. "Many follow it into the gates of hell".....so true.
That you (we) have been set free from that killer belief is somewhat of a minor miracle.....:)

Greenmachine

If you have experienced DT's (delirius tremens) you are likely an alcoholic.

beano345

lilymc wrote: »

I don't think you have to drink daily to be an alcoholic. I believe alcoholism is when you start drinking then you can't stop drinking and it seemingly takes over for a period of time.
I believe this because I have experienced this from an immediate member of my family who doesn't drink daily and has managed to hold jobs (although changing every few years maybe due to their problem) but occasionally maybe every two months some years and every 4-6 months other years they would go on an everyday drinking binge for about a fortnight then resume their normal life as if nothing happened. This to me is someone who has an alcohol problem yet doesn't drink everyday.
I would dread weddings or christenings i knew if said person started drinking the fortnight of binge drinking was likely to happen.
Although this behavior would not affect a family in the same way a person drinking everyday would it still did affect the family and of course was dangerous for the person in question.

This would be me off it for a few weeks/month then a serious bender that I dont know when will stop. When you wake up and open a drink first thing in the morning...thats a problem! I deliver alcohol for a living and in a way it puts me off it! Going into bars and the depressing vibe in them and the same barflies in the same seats telling the same stories.sad really

beano345

Greenmachine wrote: »

If you have experienced DT's (delirius tremens) you are likely an alcoholic.

Had them after my last stint! Scared the fcuk outta me

beano345

Amazingfun wrote: »

Emma, if only you knew how many people die in this country (and others) every single year due to this fatal delusion. "Many follow it into the gates of hell".....so true.
That you (we) have been set free from that killer belief is somewhat of a minor miracle.....:)

It really is the lifeblood off this country..its a strange industry to work in.was delivering to a bar in kilkenny yesterday and seen two pushbikes against a wall parked beside a brand new mercedes...the moral of the story? The owners of the bikes were at the bar drinking,the publican owned the Mercedes

Amazingfun

beano345 wrote: »

Had them after my last stint! Scared the fcuk outta me

I had them too, awful, but I'd like to think we can "raise the bottom" to where those who haven't quite reached that stage might be able to see where the train they are on is headed. DT's as a regular occurrence are part of the 'last stages' lifestyle I think.

Amazingfun

beano345 wrote: »

It really is the lifeblood off this country..its a strange industry to work in.was delivering to a bar in kilkenny yesterday and seen two pushbikes against a wall parked beside a brand new mercedes...the moral of the story? The owners of the bikes were at the bar drinking,the publican owned the Mercedes

Believe it or not my first two years of sobriety (this last kick at it ) was done whilst working in a rough pub, lol. None of my regulars could believe I stuck with it! Could hardly believe it myself.

beano345

Amazingfun wrote: »

Believe it or not my first two years of sobriety (this last kick at it ) was done whilst working in a rough pub, lol. None of my regulars could believe I stuck with it! Could hardly believe it myself.

You'd think it would be harder looking at it everyday instead of off putting! Its like when I get up on a sunday morning and see my housemates still on the go, I do be thinking thank fcuk thats not me!

Flippyfloppy

Thanks for all the replies.

I guess why I was asking is because I find the people around me only consider somebody an alcoholic if they drink at home, alone, during the day....or spend every day in the pub. In other words, someone who is constantly drunk.

I really define it as somebody who has developed a habit of drinking, that they can't go without, or need it for certain situations, be it every 'only' every Friday & Saturday. If the thoughts of missing that weekend binge drink makes your blood run cold, well that to me is alcohol dependency.

That's how I used to be. I drank every Friday & Saturday, either a couple bottles in wine each night, with my ex or friends, or out on a 'mad one!!' I could never ever understand people who gave up drink for lent. Those weeks during lent were always so action packed & full of drinking events!!

Luckily for me I grew out of it in my mid twenties, as I realized I preferred me as me, and got into more outdoor activities and happened to hang out with people who would have occasional sober nights out, so they understood me when I said I didn't want to drink.

It's just mad looking back....that I had that dependency, but to me then it was normalised. For so many people it is still normal.

I revel in my weekends now, fresh head & body every day. I actually feel rested back at work, when usually id be a total write off Sunday-Tuesday.

I do have a couple at big social events , weddings etc only a couple times a year...just to remind myself how much I hate alcohol.

Banneret

realies wrote: »

I will just offer my own perspective. I resisted and avoided admitting I was an alcoholic for years. My REAL issue with facing my alcoholism was not the "label" that so many people talk about. It was the realization that alcoholics CANNOT safely drink, and there for the only "solution" would be to stop drinking.

I didn't want to stop drinking.

So I prolonged the misery for a very long time.

Much to my amazement, finally accepting that I am an alcohlic who cannot drink safely, ever, was the beginning of my freedom from it. Once I stopped tryng to figure out how to control the uncontrollable, the air started to clear.

Getting sober isn't easy, but it's by far the best thing I've done in a very long time. My "stress" wasn't my problem. My alcohol addiction was my problem.

Only you can know what's true for you. I can only relay my own experience

I am happy for you, but stress is one of the causes of addiction.

It is related to the CRF(CLICK HERE)

There are drugs currently under investigation for the treatment of alcoholism.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CP-154,526

If you research it, it is chronic/repeated/etc Stress that can be one of the main causes of addiction.

lufties

Amazingfun wrote: »

My understanding of alcoholism is that it's a three pronged illness (not a disease as we term it ie: Cancer, etc, but rather an illness one can recover from): mental, physical, both of these resulting in a kind of spiritual destruction. That's essentially AA's definition, with heavy emphasis on what happens once one starts to drink: can you stop after three, or do you find it impossible to control the amount you ingest once you start? Also, if you've been off it for ages and want to stay off--can you? Or does the head keep knawing at you?

The main problem (ingesting alcohol) can be arrested by not drinking, but it's the head and the heart that can often still lead one back to the bottle, so for me it's best to recognize it as the peculiar 'serious something' it is, while not making myself into some kind of victim in the process. One of my real pet peeves is hearing someone who drank herself into a mess try to excuse it away with " but I have a disease", lol.
Still, many of us Irish do have a kind of physical sensitivity to it, but it's good too to remember no one ever held us down and threw the drinks down our throats.

I guess the best way to evaluate ones drinking is to make a "pro" and "con" list of how drinking shows up in your day to day life.

My "con" list was pages long and the "pro" rather short, yet I still drank for a long while before waving the white flag of surrender

Ok well, I think I can stop after 3 depending on if I have work in the morning, but to be honest if there was no repercussion I'd drink until I'm on my arse.

I don't know if this is alcoholism or the following: anxiety, depression, sadness, self pity or some other negative emotion. Probably all of the above to be honest in my case. Alcohol makes me feel good, part of something, confident ,and a kind of together of social acceptance with people. It also 'gets me out of myself'.

Jeez, even just typing this gets it off my chest.

Oh and just to note, I think stress plays a big factor. In today's inhumane, capitalist-profit at all costs world, some of us tend to get lost and alcohol is our crutch because it's a social norm.

Alcoholism to me in a nutshell is when you cross that line that you rather your life when you are drunk to when you are sober & in turn do anything in your power to keep it that way.

emmabrighton

Alcoholism to me is drinking in the moment even though you know better...

hubba

To me alcoholism is when you no longer have the choice as whether to drink or not.

Once you say to yourself 'I can't do x without drinking' then your are dependent. And dependency negatively distorts your life, more and more over time.

Carpet diem

This is my list of stuff that I cant achieve while drinking that I posted in my thread at start of January. I need to keep reminding myself of it and keep it raw in my head.

Acceptance that if I continue to drink:
- Life will always be a struggle
- My health will deteriorate
- My relationship with my girlfriend will suffer and that too will end
- My work will only ever be mediocre at best at times
- I will not progress in work
- My fitness will continue to take a back seat
- I will continue to put on weight
- I will continue to feel depressed
- I will become a chronic alcoholic with no control over my life (I have some power to do change things around now for sure)
- I will not have a nice family house with wife and kids
- I will never be happy
- My relationship with my family will continue to worsen (even thou it's ok now it could be better)
- I will not have any money at the end of each month
- I will not be able to save for the future
- I will not have a nice car to drive around in
- I will not enjoy nice things in life e.g trips to cinema, meals out and gigs
- I will not become a better person
- I will not enjoy the small precious moments in life
- I will not get proper sleep
- I will continue to call in sock for work or be late
- I will not get up on time for work, at weekend and end out all day in bed
- My dreams and aspirations will never be a possibility
- I will become worse with dealing with people on a daily basis
- My paranoia after drinking will get worse
- Therefore eventually I will have no job, no happiness, no girlfriend, no proper friends, no money, bad health and a bleak future

I need to accept that:
- I cannot do this alone and need to attend meetings regularly and seek professional advise
- there are gone be time when life is hard/lonely and I will feel sorry for myself
- BUT drink will not solve this and the feeling will pass.
- I have no control over drink and need to hand it over to himself.

cometogether

Well I suppose one good definition of addiction is that its a habitual behaviour that cannot be relinquished or controlled in spite of its negative consequences