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Any one else feel like this from time to time?

  • 23-10-2013 10:53pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all.

    Hoping for some advice / motivation.

    Feel incredibly demotivated at the moment due to a number of reasons.

    I don't feel I don't know where my life is going. Have no plan in place and every second week I want to do something different career wise, hence not being able to make a decision on career direction in relation to courses or career path. I don't have a partner and am approaching 30 therefore concious I may not have more children . I can't afford to rent and am still living at the family home. Feel trapped in a job I dislike.

    I used to be a motivated and energetic person yet this has diminished drastically. I feel like I am never going to get on my feet and have turned into an extremely negative person. My feeling of self worth is diminishing. People around me are moving on career wise, settling down with people however I'm in the same position I was 10 years ago....

    The adverse affects of this is probably sending out bad vibes to potential partners etc.

    How do people cope when they are feeling like this?

    Thanks in advance for any guidance and possible inspiration


Comments

  • #2
    Plek Trum
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,074 ✭✭✭Plek Trum


    Hi OP,

    Don't worry - from my own experience (and those of friends) this is quite normal to arrive at some stage!
    We all get comparative, see friends settling down, moving on, getting marries or having kids - its natural to end up saying to yourself 'right.. what am I up to?"

    I would advise the following:
    1) Make a list of the things you would like to achieve (positive approach, rather than 'have nots')
    2) Decide which of these you would like to tackle first
    3) How to go about it? Course application, new social groups, voluntary experience, etc. Figure how you can get towards it.
    4) Set yourself a REALISTIC timeframe to achieve them in (Im talking years, not months)

    I had a an experience extremely similar to yours a year ot two ago. Couldn't figure out where I was, what I wanted, felt useless, like I was achieving nothing etc (despite having a good job, friends, and a partner!) It really really got me down, surprisingly so.

    I made a list of things I want to achieve by the time I was 40, narrowed it down to 4 (family, house, travel, new job) I had to figure out the best order to do these in. I made a promise to myself that when I celebrated my 40th I would have done at least one off the list, if not 2 or 3.

    There's 4 years to go, 3 of them are in motion (so to speak)!

    As long as you make a priority list and can start to do research, savings, application etc towards it , you WILL feel better, no matter how small the effort.

    Its easy to get overwhelmed by it all and quite hard to figure out how to get going unless you approach it objectively.
    You will know you have started towards something you want. Its a positive start - go get it and feel good about your decisions! Best of luck


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