First relationship - need advice

LegacyUser

Hi everyone,

I would appreciate some advice on this.

Basically, I met a guy about a month ago when I was on a sun holiday for a week. It turns out we are from the same county and we got on well - met up twice while we were away, kissed once and swapped numbers and when we got home were texting and met up once since then.

My problem is, I got an invite to a wedding yesterday (which I wasn't expecting) that's on in December and I was thinking if I'm still with this guy by then should I bring him as my guest?

I should point out that I have never been in a relationship before so I have no idea what I'm doing to be quite honest!

The wedding is in a different county so realistically I would have to stay the night in the hotel. This is the part that I'm worried about - if I ask him to the wedding then he will have to stay the night also and naturally he will assume that he is staying with me; however, I'm a virigin and I really don't think that we will have 'done the deed' so to speak by then.

Am I better off just not asking him? I don't want to embarrass him either.

It's extremely early days obviously but I have to RSVP by the start of November so I'm panicking now!

Should I even be thinking about asking him to the wedding?!

This is all new to me so I'd appreciate some advice.

Thanks

ShaShaBear

panicker1! wrote: »

Hi everyone,

I would appreciate some advice on this.

Basically, I met a guy about a month ago when I was on a sun holiday for a week. It turns out we are from the same county and we got on well - met up twice while we were away, kissed once and swapped numbers and when we got home were texting and met up once since then.

My problem is, I got an invite to a wedding yesterday (which I wasn't expecting) that's on in December and I was thinking if I'm still with this guy by then should I bring him as my guest?

I should point out that I have never been in a relationship before so I have no idea what I'm doing to be quite honest!

The wedding is in a different county so realistically I would have to stay the night in the hotel. This is the part that I'm worried about - if I ask him to the wedding then he will have to stay the night also and naturally he will assume that he is staying with me; however, I'm a virigin and I really don't think that we will have 'done the deed' so to speak by then.

Am I better off just not asking him? I don't want to embarrass him either.

It's extremely early days obviously but I have to RSVP by the start of November so I'm panicking now!

Should I even be thinking about asking him to the wedding?!

This is all new to me so I'd appreciate some advice.

Thanks

Unless it's one of those invites where you have to specify that you are bringing the plus one, don't worry about it - especially if you will be going regardless. TBH I think a wedding that soon would be a bit daunting for any new bf, especially if it is family and he won't know a soul.

Besides, you're still barely even dating, asking him to go might be fine a week or two before the wedding but since you're uncomfortable about asking him and the sleeping arrangements, I'd not mention it. Especially this early!:o

Emme

OP, it's early days and your first relationship so I wouldn't worry about bringing him as a partner. I've gone on my own to weddings and had a great time because it was a chance to meet up with friends, have a laugh and a situation like that might have been awkward for a newish partner.

Also the wedding is in another county so he would have to pay for his hotel etc. Four months in is too soon for that sort of expense. Play it by ear with him but my advice is to go on your own or with a friend who knows the couple getting married and enjoy it.

Scortho

I've been with my gf three years and is freak out a bit if I was invited as a plus one.
It wouldn't bother me in the slightest if I didn't go.
It all depends on your age. Were both 21 so wouldn't have too many friends of the marrying age thankfully.
I think it depends what age you are though, I'm going to guess still quite young.

MadMardegan

Why not put down a +1 without saying anything to him?

You can ask him a few weeks before hand, if he says yes then great, if he says no then just make up some excuse on the day.

oconnorw

No do not ask him unless you have sorted out the sleeping arrangements in advance. Communicate with him that is what it is all about so that he knows where he stands.

Brego888

You've only just met him in the last month.
You've never had a boyfriend before.
You're worried about sleeping arrangements and sleeping together.
You're not even officially going out.
I'm guessing your are both quite young.

I think you are putting unnecessary pressure on yourself. Don't invite him.

LegacyUser

Brego888 wrote: »

You've only just met him in the last month.
You've never had a boyfriend before.
You're worried about sleeping arrangements and sleeping together.
You're not even officially going out.
I'm guessing your are both quite young.

I think you are putting unnecessary pressure on yourself. Don't invite him.

Actually I'm 28, just never had a relationship, hence the not knowing which way to go about it!
Thanks everyone for the advice, I've decided that I won't be asking him anyway, too soon for me at the moment I think