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What age is best .....

  • 02-10-2013 10:56pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    ....to tell your child that Mom and Dad are separated and are not getting back together?

    All along we've used work distances make it impossible for Mommy and Daddy to live together as well as Mommy is happier in her house, while Daddy is happier in his.
    We did this because our son was too young to understand at 3, now he's 7. We feel it might be time. Do you agree?

    If so, how or what would/did you say to be it bearable for them?


Comments

  • #2
    Moonbeam
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,986 Mod ✭✭✭✭Moonbeam


    I think honesty is the best policy,don't lie to your child. I think I was 5 when my parents split up and knew from the statrt.
    If he is 7 he probably knows already.


  • #3
    m'lady
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,859 ✭✭✭m'lady


    Definitely agree with the previous poster, be honest and at 7 yes, he probably has an idea- and possibly afraid to ask, or perhaps feels that because he hasn't been told then he's wrong and feels silly.

    Personally I feel the younger the child the easier it is on them, having experienced it myself. I was 16 years old when my parents separated and I have to say it was the hardest thing in the world, meanwhile my 6 year old brother was ok with it.

    Tell him- it may even help you both ( you and your ex), as keeping this quiet has to have had an impact on you from the point of moving on.


  • #4
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I would go with sooner the better with honesty here too. The child is every day building a world view about their life based on incomplete or false facts. There is a chance that the longer it goes on the harder such a world view will be to change. The sooner the child can start to deal with reality - the better it may be for them to do so.


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