Keeping Your Husbands name.

Kettleson

No really, I cant get my head around this. It's bad enough for a person to change their name to the male name in marriage, as many do with much eager enthusiasm.

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

What twisted logic or reasoning or benefit is there to this?

Femme_Fatale

Kettleson wrote: »

No really, I cant get my head around this. It's bad enough for a person to change their name to the male name in marriage, as many do with much eager enthusiasm.

I would for certain stuff if I got married - just for practical's sake. I'd keep my maiden name for stuff where there's no need to change it. The gender politics stuff is pointless IMO as, in order to be consistent, she wouldn't take her father's surname, wouldn't accept her mother taking her father's surname etc etc. It would be endless.

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

What twisted logic or reasoning or benefit is there to this?

People can do strange stuff, it's their concern at the end of the day.

HondaSami

Kettleson wrote: »

No really, I cant get my head around this. It's bad enough for a person to change their name to the male name in marriage, as many do with much eager enthusiasm.

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

What twisted logic or reasoning or benefit is there to this?

What's the point in changing it after using it for 10 yrs?

Rho b

When children are involved then its easier if the mother keeps the ex's name at least until they are over 18 or finished full time education.

TommiesTank

Kettleson wrote: »

No really, I cant get my head around this. It's bad enough for a person to change their name to the male name in marriage, as many do with much eager enthusiasm.

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

What twisted logic or reasoning or benefit is there to this?

Why do you care?

paddy147

Cheryl Cole

OR

Cheryl Tweedy







Decisions Decisions

pharmaton

My pup has officially taken my family surname, she always used it growing up and didn't know any different but when she went to the social for the first time during the summer they couldn't find her details with that name and we discovered they had automatically registered her with her fathers family name. Couple of signatures later and she's now free of any link with them. I'm proud of my family roots so would never consider changing my own name either.

shruikan2553

It makes it easier for the child to have the same surname as parents so somebody is gonna have to take someones name. Maybe flip a coin?

Women who keep their names after a break up in the marriage tend to have been married for awhile and must decide it is easier than trying to change everything back again.

Rho b

Kettleson wrote: »

No really, I cant get my head around this. It's bad enough for a person to change their name to the male name in marriage, as many do with much eager enthusiasm.

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

What twisted logic or reasoning or benefit is there to this?

Also could depend if they are legally separated/divorced. If the wife maintains the ex husbands name over the years and say he happened to win the lotto etc, then it may have some bearing on any future claim that she could have against him.

Sgt. Al Powell

Kettleson wrote: »

But then when the bloke does the dirt and the childless marriage breaks up and he's been a right prick and various things, 10 years down the line, herself is still using his surname as her name?

You say that like it's inevitable.

I think couples should merge surnames like the what the red tops do the celeb people.

Like Dawn Porter became, Dawn O'Porter:

https://twitter.com/hotpatooties

getzls

With all the intermarriage in the South there is a fair
chance the bride and groom have the same name anyway.;)

metaoblivia

My mom kept her married name after she and my father divorced. They had been married for over 25 years and she felt that she had built up a professional reputation under that name and didn't want to go to the trouble of changing it back.
On the other hand, I had a friend get married under sort of whirlwind circumstances (she met and married the guy within a 6 month time frame) and she waited a couple of years before legally changing her name "just in case."
Myself, if I ever end up getting married, I'd probably change my surname. I don't like it all that much and don't feel any family loyalty towards it, so it would just be easier in the event I ended up having kids. And my brother's already passed the family name down to his children.

MadsL

Because if you have worked your ass off during the marriage to establish a career and professional reputation then you don't want to de-brand yourself.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Two kids in my year in school had a double barrelled surname. Both have since dropped their mothers surname.

A bit of a mouthful maybe. I suppose it only confuses things in steady families where the fella hasn't taken long steps, you're born into your father's family and you take his name.

dharma200

For all the reasons above, having children with different surnames can be problematic... Having a name for a number of years and having to change it back can be problematic.

Family trees etc run on the premise of a woman taking the husbands name.

I is something absolutely pointless to either wonder about or exclaim about unless you are or have experienced the actual situation.

Have no idea why I am answering this.

jill_valentine

I keep dating stuff "2012" still, ffs.

I think I'd only ever take a name if it was so many multiples more awesome than mine that it justified the hassle. We're talking "McCatwoman" or better.

3DataModem

Tina Turner kept her name, and her ex was no angel.

Kettleson

3DataModem wrote: »

Tina Turner kept her name, and her ex was no angel.

I can appreciate Anna Mae Bullock wishing to keep her name for commercial reasons.:)

For clarity, in the case I mentioned, there were no children from the relationship.

Im divorced, and I still use the ex husbands name. I like having the same name as my children.
Maybe some day Ill change it, but see no reason to at this point.

loubeelou

Kettleson wrote: »

I can appreciate Anna Mae Bullock wishing to keep her name for commercial reasons.:)

For clarity, in the case I mentioned, there were no children from the relationship.

I suppose for some women, they may have a sense of identity built around their married name and when their marriage collapses, its just too much to lose the married name as well. So they keep it, just like some people hang on to their engagement/wedding rings.
Whatever keeps you off the balcony.

kupus

Whats going to happen when ross o carrol-kelly is going to get married to jacinta reid-o'reilly

Fred Swanson

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