I made mistakes that are eating me up.Need outside opinion to help me get over this.

Mellytots

The last few months I have been working very hard to achieve my goals and have. However in the process I have also been very impulsive and done and said stupid things without thinking. I was very naïve and shared to much info with people who I wanted to trust but where not really my friend. I know now they used this info as ammunition against me. For some reason I was drawn to these people who are actually not nice. Don't know why I wanted their friendship at all. Its like I was blinded to how **** they where treating me. I feel like they have been backstabbing me, playing me, and manipulating me. It's like I have just discovered that I was in very dangerous territory. I feel that I stepped on the wrong peoples toes. There was envious people in this group wanting to bring me down.I Feel stupid and embarrassed for wasting time with these people. When I know they have been sneering and talking badly of me. I feel I gave them the power and ammunition to do this. it is really tormenting me to the point I feel physically sick. I am usually a lot more wiser than to fall into traps like this. I feel I was very down the last few months my defences where down and I was in a very vulnerable stage of my life. Any advice on how to get over this and move forward.

Stick Monkey

Mellytots wrote: »

The last few months I have been working very hard to achieve my goals and have. However in the process I have also been very impulsive and done and said stupid things without thinking. I was very naïve and shared to much info with people who I wanted to trust but where not really my friend. I know now they used this info as ammunition against me. For some reason I was drawn to these people who are actually not nice. Don't know why I wanted their friendship at all. Its like I was blinded to how **** they where treating me. I feel like they have been backstabbing me, playing me, and manipulating me. It's like I have just discovered that I was in very dangerous territory. I feel that I stepped on the wrong peoples toes. There was envious people in this group wanting to bring me down.I Feel stupid and embarrassed for wasting time with these people. When I know they have been sneering and talking badly of me. I feel I gave them the power and ammunition to do this. it is really tormenting me to the point I feel physically sick. I am usually a lot more wiser than to fall into traps like this. I feel I was very down the last few months my defences where down and I was in a very vulnerable stage of my life. Any advice on how to get over this and move forward.

Have you considered joining a club to meet new people

Mellytots

I have some good friends and am involved in lots of stuff. I have cut off contact with the people who were playing me. I still feel bad about the situation. They have been gossiping about me made me look bad. They even went as far to jeopardise potential future opportunities for me. Maybe I am blowing it out of proportion but I feel stripped of my dignity.

freshpopcorn

What exactly did they do and what did you say?

Mellytots

I didn't say anything really bad. It's like they have the ability to turn innocent conversation into something malicious. Just trying to find fault with me. To be honest I just think they are very judgemental and snooty.

boomchicawawa

I think that the fact you have 'woken up' to the situation and appear to have seized it up is a great and positive step. We all get caught up in situations like this, 'c'est la vie' as they say. I think you're more beating yourself up about being stupid than any real repercussions about how this people will use the information you provided. What you have to do is take the emotion out of the situation and put it into perspective. Someone once told me the 7 rule for doing this ie...will you be upset about it in 7 minutes, 7 hours, 7 days, 7 weeks etc.?

When you do this you may find that its not really as bad as you think and you can try and bin the memories into your cerebral trash can :P. Put distance between yourself and these individuals, I don't know if they are classmates, friends, workmates etc. I don't know who your buddies were before but maybe you should make new ones or renew old ones. You can analyze why you were sucked in until the cows come home, you hinted they were snooty, perhaps you thought they were in some way 'superior' to you in a social standing and as you've found, birds of a feather is usually more comfortable flocking together and appearances can be deceitful.

Its a life's lesson and you know the next time you'll be much wiser ! Don't be so hard on yourself.

Xidu

Every time you feel bad about this, just tell yourself "so what! I don't care. It's not the end of the world! They can't do anything to me anymore." say as many as you can, eventually you will really not care about it anymore. I tried this way and it works.