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Did anyone else feel like this after coming out to someone?

  • 06-09-2013 10:14pm
    #1
    Poppy121
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20 ✭


    I came out to my best friend a few nights ago. We were out and I was drunk. I just remember crying but I'm not really sure how I said it.

    Anyways, she was really sweet and told me she accepted me, that she doesn't care and she gave me a big hug. It was amazing to be accepted because I really wasn't sure how she'd take it. I still can't believe I actually did it.

    But I felt weird after telling her. It's hard to explain. I just got really paranoid and I'm worried that she'll think I like her or something. (I don't). Or that if we hug or hold hands on a night out she'll get creeped out and think I'm enjoying it too much.

    I guess I just feel really vulnerable now that someone knows, I thought as soon as I'd finally told someone that I'd feel liberated, but I don't.

    I also feel like it wasn't the right way to tell her, I wish I could've explained myself better.

    I still feel awkward. I told her like the day before I moved away and went to college so I haven't seen her since. When we're texting I can't help but cringe at telling her. In a way, I sort of wish I hadn't told her. I'm afraid it'll be really awkward the next time I see her.

    Anyone advice?


Comments

  • #2
    door
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 203 ✭✭door


    I also felt very awkward and uncomfortable after telling the first person I was gay. The only advice I can tell you is that in a few weeks time, maybe a couple of months, you will probably not feel this way at all and after your next encounter with her, things will get more relaxed for you. It's all part of the anxiety you are feeling right now and it needs time to calm down. As good friends, if that is what you are, you may very well eventually have private jokes about your sexuality and there will be that unspoken understanding between the two of you. There really is no right way to tell somebody you are gay. Please don't worry at all and just be patient. Focus now on making a happy life yourself without the suppression of your sexual identity :)


  • #3
    lyinghere
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 132 ✭✭lyinghere


    I always feel awkward after telling people. It does pass reasonably quickly, maybe the first time meeting up is awkward but then it fades. It is a pretty big change for you and for the person you tell so its understable.

    It is better to have that very short term awkwardness than keep hiding it though....


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