Said the wrong thing

LegacyUser

I really put my foot in it this morning and have been feeling really bad all day! I've been working at a place for a few weeks (trying not to give too many details). I thought one of my colleagues looked familiar when I started, but put it down to her having one of those faces. I was watching TV a few nights ago and saw my colleague...she was a fairly big actress 10-15 years ago and would have been well-known. I stupidly blurted it out next time I saw her (just the two of us, would never have done it in front of others), said 'ah I knew I'd recognised you from somewhere, you were in X programme!' and she looked really angry and said, 'no, I'm not her' and changed the topic. I feel awful now, as she obviously doesn't want anyone to know who she is. I'm worried that I've made her feel uncomfortable and worried that I'll blab about who she is (I won't)....Shouldn't have said anything but it was an impulse. Should I just pretend I believed her, that she wasn't ever famous, and never mention it again?

The_Conductor

Just don't mention it again. Lots of people are private people- who don't go around telling everyone about every little episode of their past. It doesn't mean they're not proud of their past- just its private- its their personal right to tell others, or not tell others.

LegacyUser

The_Conductor wrote: »

Just don't mention it again. Lots of people are private people- who don't go around telling everyone about every little episode of their past. It doesn't mean they're not proud of their past- just its private- its their personal right to tell others, or not tell others.

That's fine with me. I don't mind that she doesn't want to be known. I just feel awful that I put my foot in it. It's a natural reaction, I suppose, but really regret it now.

Merkin

I wouldn't bring it up again and definitely wouldn't say it to any other colleagues.

Chara1001

Don't worry about it op, you weren't to know she doesn't want to talk about it. You didn't do anything wrong although you would be if you told anyone about it!

Stavro Mueller

To be honest her reaction was a bit over the top. It's not your fault that you recognised her and that it was a sore point with her. How were you to know that it was something that bothered her?

blindside88

Is it possible that its not her? She may have been asked before and might think that she looks nothing like this person

LegacyUser

Nope, definitely her. I could see by the reaction as well. I just feel stupid because there was always the chance she'd just deny it anyway...not sure why I asked or what I was expecting in hindsight. Just a natural reaction, I guess. I'm really worried now that she'll feel like she has to change job or will feel uncomfortable (she's been in the job for years and I'm new). There was no malice meant at all, I just feel like an idiot.

Meauldsegosha

awkwardsituation wrote: »

Nope, definitely her. I could see by the reaction as well. I just feel stupid because there was always the chance she'd just deny it anyway...not sure why I asked or what I was expecting in hindsight. Just a natural reaction, I guess. I'm really worried now that she'll feel like she has to change job or will feel uncomfortable (she's been in the job for years and I'm new). There was no malice meant at all, I just feel like an idiot.

If she was as famous as you say the chances are your other colleagues already know she was an actress. It's also a bit egotistical to think she is going to leave her job because of you. The best thing you can do now is forget about it and don't mention it again.

Stavro Mueller

Just to add another point. You can't take up acting, either as an amateur or as a professional and expect people not to recognise you. It goes with the territory. I hope for your sake she's not a bitchy prima-donna. As I said previously you did nothing wrong. All you were trying to do was make conversation with a new colleague. It's hard to say this nicely with text but you are over reacting to something very minor in the grand scale of things.

Dtp79

I'm dying to know who it is !!

Das Kitty

Unless it was a programme with *ahem* adult situations, I don't think you did anything at all wrong. If it's on the telly still, it's bound to come up from time to time for her. She should practise her reaction a bit better if she wants people to believe her when she denies it. Then again, maybe that's why she's no longer an actress!

Cunning Stunt

If she takes part in a programme for national TV then she should be able to deal with people approaching her like that. She reacted like an eejit. Don't worry about it.

hardCopy

I can't see anything wrong in what you did. If she can't deal with people recognising her that's her problem. Just don't bring it up again, I'm sure everyone she meets brings it up at some point.

Maybe she's just bitter that her acting career is over.

Dtp79

Yed swear she was in witness protection

heretochat

hardCopy wrote: »

I can't see anything wrong in what you did. If she can't deal with people recognising her that's her problem. Just don't bring it up again, I'm sure everyone she meets brings it up at some point

Agree with this. She put herself up there to be recognised so can't be reacting this way when someone does recognise her.

Riskymove

blindside88 wrote: »

Is it possible that its not her? She may have been asked before and might think that she looks nothing like this person

unless she has changed her name it can be sorted easily enough surely?

freshpopcorn

Hi, I think the person over reacted but if the person was so famous all you would have to do would be Google their name. I say you shouldn't bring it up again.
I think the woman might have reacted badly because she might miss her old life. Often people rise to fame when their young and than the work dries up and they may eventually have to find a normal job again. This might have being hard for her because she might have given up on her dream and she'd prefer to forget it.

LegacyUser

She's been working there a long time. I imagine she's built up a feeling of security that people don't recognise her there and don't bring up the acting (we deal with the public and nobody has ever recognised her while I've been there). I imagine she's worried I'll now tell other colleagues/people or even the press...when I Googled her there was loads of fan pages and 'where is she now?' type questions.

I had the whole 'she put herself out there' attitude at first (she was really quite rude to me for recognising her) but then I thought about how long ago it was that she was famous...she might well regret ever going into the public eye and just want a normal quiet life now.

Stavro Mueller

With all due respect, I doubt she's lying awake at night worrying about you rumbling her. If ye deal with the public she probably has been recognised loads of times but people haven't said it to her. Anyway, as long as you say nothing more about it, you'll be grand.

Caonima

Probably that feckin Samantha Mambo, or whatever her name is...