I can't live at home anymore

mosher 66

firstly i didnt know where to put this
now, im 20 years of age, and i really cant live in my house with my parents anymore, its becoming way to hard, im always on edge, and today my anxiety has been at an all time high all day, i dont have a job but i am currentley seeking one, i only have a leaving cert applied of 173 points, i am awaiting a place a BCFE to do games creation, my problem is, what can i do, i have tried talking to my parents, but no matter what my dad cant change, i am currentley going to a counsslor, but its not helping since he broke my trust the last session i now need a new one,

daddyorchips

mosher 66 wrote: »

firstly i didnt know where to put this
now, im 20 years of age, and i really cant live in my house with my parents anymore, its becoming way to hard, im always on edge, and today my anxiety has been at an all time high all day, i dont have a job but i am currentley seeking one, i only have a leaving cert applied of 173 points, i am awaiting a place a BCFE to do games creation, my problem is, what can i do, i have tried talking to my parents, but no matter what my dad cant change, i am currentley going to a counsslor, but its not helping since he broke my trust the last session i now need a new one,

173 points in lca ? U get either a pass,merit or distinction in lca.

mosher 66

daddyorchips wrote: »

173 points in lca ? U get either a pass,merit or distinction in lca.

you still get points aswell, your points tell you which you get

Level Marks and Credits Required
Pass 60-69% (120-139 credits)
Merit 70-84% (140-169 credits)
Distinction 85-100% (170-200 credits)

but thats really not the point here

daddyorchips

mosher 66 wrote: »

you still get points aswell, your points tell you which you get

Level Marks and Credits Required
Pass 60-69% (120-139 credits)
Merit 70-84% (140-169 credits)
Distinction 85-100% (170-200 credits)

but thats really not the point here

fair point, why not leave home then? Have you anyone to put you up for awhile ?.

Immaculata

Hopefully you won't mind if I ask: when will you hear about your place to do Games Creation? Which college or institute will you be attending? Is that college or institute far from where you live now? Have you applied for a place on the housing list at your local county council offices?

mosher 66

Immaculata wrote: »

Hopefully you won't mind if I ask: when will you hear about your place to do Games Creation? Which college or institute will you be attending? Is that college or institute far from where you live now? Have you applied for a place on the housing list at your local county council offices?

Ballyfermot college of further education, its not that far, but i would have to get a bus or two up to the college, I have to reapply because i didnt get in this year since i applyed too late (I didnt even know the college or course existed until the day i applyed for it, found it on halifax) and what exactley is a housing list?

cluelez

get ur affairs together. don't listen to all what you read on the internet.

Stay in parent's home as long as you manage to finish college, then get job and repay parents what they did for you for supporting you through college...

It's not hard at all.

mosher 66

daddyorchips wrote: »

fair point, why not leave home then? Have you anyone to put you up for awhile ?.

Im trying to find a relative or friend to stay with right now, just its not looking good, alot of them have various things going on

Iopu

I'm in a similar situation to you. At one point I was only going into my house to sleep. I am starting college soon. So I can't work full-time until after I finish my degree. I'm not sure if I can afford to move out.

mosher 66

Iopu wrote: »

I'm in a similar situation to you. At one point I was only going into my house to sleep. I am starting college soon. So I can't work full-time until after I finish my degree. I'm not sure if I can afford to move out.

Personally im able to get out on saturdays, then im hoping to start staying at a friends on saturday nights, so that will give me all day saturday and most of sunday out of the house, but weekdays im usually trapped here due to money issues

Immaculata

mosher 66 wrote: »

Ballyfermot college of further education, its not that far, but i would have to get a bus or two up to the college, I have to reapply because i didnt get in this year since i applyed too late (I didnt even know the college or course existed until the day i applyed for it, found it on halifax) and what exactley is a housing list?

If you're not going to college until next year, there's no point in trying to get student accommodation at this point, so that rules that out.

The housing list is the waiting list for people with a housing need who would like council housing. It's also the first thing you need to sign up for if you ever need to apply for homeless accommodation (God forbid) or, more importantly in your situation, for rent allowance at some point. I suggest you contact your local council's housing department and enquire about applying to be on the housing list. Having an application on there is crucial, IMHO.

While you're in touch with the housing department, you might like to ask what your options are regarding emergency accommodation, especially if there's been any violence (I hope not).

Gatling

If you plan to rent on your own you would be on enitiled to less than 300pm with Rent assistance which you have to contribute 30pw add your bills and foods on top of that ,
Before that you would have to be renting for 6 months privately on your own, Then explain how you can no longer afford to pay your rent ,
But before you even get that far you have to be accepted on to your local authority housing list as having a housing need

meoklmrk91

Right if you are looking to get out you can apply for you local councils housing list, they will assess you to see if you have a need and if you do then they will place you on the housing list and you will be eligible for rent supplement. This is a long process and if you are going to do it get your affairs in order, you will need a number of things for your application but the first thing to do is get the form, you can get this online and print it out, call into the council offices or ring them and ask them to send it out to you and start from there.

You will be waiting anywhere from around 6 weeks to 2 months depending on the council the wait time could be sorter or longer. One word of advice as someone who is currently going through this process, it is much tougher to get on the council list than it used to be, especially if you are a young person who doesn't have children, they want young people to stay at home and if there is room for you there and you don't provide proof that staying there is detrimental to your well being then they will deny your application. So you need to do everything you can to prove it.

I was personally told that I needed a letter from a Garda or a social worker stating that I had to leave home either for my own safety or for the benefit of my wellbeing. If you have dealt with Gardai in relation to your father then ask them to write a letter stating this. If there is a social worker dealing with you with regards to counselling or anything else then get them to write a letter, get your doctor, your counsellor, anyone and everyone you can get to write a letter do, it will only strengthen your case.

In the meantime try and find somewhere to to stay. If you can't then just do everything you can to avoid your father.

Also in relation to getting some money and having something to do contact VTOS and FAS in your area, find out what courses they are running and try and get a place, if you have to stay at home at least if you are doing some sort of a course then you will be out of the house and you will get a training allowance. I understand that the course you wanted to is not available to you this year but that just means that you have an entire year to do something else, add something to your CV.

Immaculata

meoklmrk91 wrote: »

Right if you are looking to get out you can apply for you local councils housing list, they will assess you to see if you have a need and if you do then they will place you on the housing list and you will be eligible for rent supplement. This is a long process and if you are going to do it get your affairs in order, you will need a number of things for your application but the first thing to do is get the form, you can get this online and print it out, call into the council offices or ring them and ask them to send it out to you and start from there.

You will be waiting anywhere from around 6 weeks to 2 months depending on the council the wait time could be sorter or longer. One word of advice as someone who is currently going through this process, it is much tougher to get on the council list than it used to be, especially if you are a young person who doesn't have children, they want young people to stay at home and if there is room for you there and you don't provide proof that staying there is detrimental to your well being then they will deny your application. So you need to do everything you can to prove it.

I was personally told that I needed a letter from a Garda or a social worker stating that I had to leave home either for my own safety or for the benefit of my wellbeing. If you have dealt with Gardai in relation to your father then ask them to write a letter stating this. If there is a social worker dealing with you with regards to counselling or anything else then get them to write a letter, get your doctor, your counsellor, anyone and everyone you can get to write a letter do, it will only strengthen your case.

In the meantime try and find somewhere to to stay. If you can't then just do everything you can to avoid your father.

Also in relation to getting some money and having something to do contact VTOS and FAS in your area, find out what courses they are running and try and get a place, if you have to stay at home at least if you are doing some sort of a course then you will be out of the house and you will get a training allowance. I understand that the course you wanted to is not available to you this year but that just means that you have an entire year to do something else, add something to your CV.

Well said.

Just to note, the waiting time meoklmrk91 mentions is to get on the housing list. The waiting time to actually get offered a council house or flat depends on the council and many factors but eight years or more is routine.

Gatling

Immaculata wrote: »

Well said.

Just to note, the waiting time meoklmrk91 mentions is to get on the housing list. The waiting time to actually get offered a council house or flat depends on the council and many factors but eight years or more is routine.

Eight Years or more apply to families

Single people have been known to wait over 12 years +

meoklmrk91

Immaculata wrote: »

Well said.

Just to note, the waiting time meoklmrk91 mentions is to get on the housing list. The waiting time to actually get offered a council house or flat depends on the council and many factors but eight years or more is routine.

That is correct I should have been a bit more specific on that.

Iopu

I was actually going to apply to the game design course at BCFE too. But I decided against it because it is too far from me. It's not too late to get a place in a college for this year though. I was accepted to Whitehall CFE last year in the September round of interviews and the class had lots of empty places. Some people were even accepted when the course had already started.

Pawwed Rig

Have you considered other options? I had a friend in a similar position who moved to Germany to work in pubs for a few years. Earned enough to get by and got fluent in German.
You can then do part time college courses in whatever you are interested in. They take slightly longer but at the end of it you have the same qualification.

Alternatively take any available work here and do the same thing which will give you a wage and an option to rent under your own steam.