Facebook friending issue

LegacyUser

Without going into too much details ...

I became somewhat infatuated with a very pretty girl who I encounter on a regular enough basis in a retail location.
I never struck up a conversation with her but I felt there were some very positive vibes based on glances and other body language.
I put her out of my head for a while but a recent visit to where she works and again some vibes that I read as positive led me to check her out on Facebook.
I am not in her social circle but I did find her profile and one evening I got over-eager Dutch courage to send her a Facebook friend request.
The following day I noticed that the request had been denied.
The "friend request sent" status on her profile had switched back to "Add a friend".

In sending the friend request without having ever introduced myself personally to her I had dug a bit of a hole for myself.
I encountered her in the meantime again via glances, etc and I wasn't sure if the body language had changed.
I anguished over all of the week to apologise to her for having sent the request just to be a gentleman, etc.
It would have been embarrassing for me to just stroll by her in the fear that she might think I was brazen to have sent the request.

The crunch question is more to do with Facebook and how it works.
I had the courage to approach her today and give my apology (really to ensure she hadn't taken the request as being creepy, etc).
She was absolutely lovely in how she approached my shy approach.
She was saying "don't worry" etc but was adamant she had actually never even seen the request in the first place and she laughed it off in a very pleasant and sweet way.
<cringe/embarassing for me !!!>

The question is.
Is it technically possible for her to have not received a request, eg: if she has some setting like only accept friend requests from mutual friends set ?
I'm just mulling if she had said that she hadn't received it just not to cause offense to me (she turns out to be very sweet as far as I can see).

Ham Sambo

Honestly, I would leave well enough alone if I was you, you tested the waters though FB and it didn't work too well, approaching her to apologies for sending her a friendship request and then been rejected in my opinion is not a good idea, look, you tried your best with this girl, time to move on!

tinkerbell

No OP - she saw the request and denied it. There's only one way it goes from Pending to Add Friend and that's if the person you sent it to rejects it.

People use facebook differently - some add everybody even if they don't know them, some add everybody they ever knew (even if they are no longer friends with them) and some people use it for people they are only currently friendly with. Perhaps she's in the final category and doesn't want people she doesn't know seeing her stuff. Totally understandable and I wouldn't take offence.

I agree with the above - just leave it well alone. She probably has figured out now that you are into her so leave the ball in her court.

Lorna123

She could have gotten your request but not recognized you as someone she knew and just automatically denied it. Did she even know your name? Now she knows it was you she will most definitely know you are into her. I think that if she is into you she will now look up your profile and send you a friend request. If there is nothing coming from her then I would just forget about it.

Grandpa Hassan

Honestly OP, and sorry to be blunt, you messed this one up. You are going to dig yourself a bigger hole by trying to talk to her about the friend request. You'll know better for next time. Fact is that a lot of people don't like random friend requests....genuinely see it as FB stalking. Always best introduce yourself in person

All you can do now is talk to her and introduce yourself if and when the situation presents itself. And pretend like the FB thing never happened, at least until you get to know her better....then you can drop it into conversation almost in passing

ShaShaBear

Gotta be blunt like everyone else here.

If she was in any way interested in even being friends, she would have said "Oh, that was YOU! I couldn't make out who it was so I rejected it, I'll add you when I get home".

Instead she pretended she didn't see it in order to not offend you and possibly to maintain a positive image between the two of you if she has noticed she runs into you quite a bit.

Take it as a lesson learned, introduce yourself to a stranger before you add them on Facebook in future, and be glad she had the manners not to make it very awkward by deeming you as some sort of stalker who follows her around a retail centre and checks her Facebook