The end of a the search

Wittner

Well,

the social worker has finally found my wife's birth mother. After 3 years, incorrect names on paperwork in Bessborough, incorrect names on the Adoption agency paperwork and incorrect names on my wife's birth cert and incorrect ages for the birth mother, we have finally gotten an answer. Unfortunately my wife's birth mother died about 10 years ago but it looks like we will get to meet at least one of her uncles, who seems very keen to know more and it seems he may also know the identity of her birth father (although he has also sadly passed). It will be nice to get closure and for my kids to know something more of their past history.

Amazingly, the case had been closed about 2 months ago after a couple of dead-ends and only after my wife wrote to Bessborough asking if any of the older nuns might remember anything of her mother, that the HSE 'noticed' another name on the paperwork and decided to re-open the case.

I am none the wiser as to how this whole system works. Personally I am embittered of this state system that yet again supported lies and deceit through legal and other more sneaky methods. I am also glad that my wife has the information she has wanted and searched for so long.

Many thanks to the helpful people on this forum for their understanding, support and knowledge. My wife has often taken comfort and solice from reading from this forum. We are due to meet the social worker next week and then hopefully my wife's uncle and his wife the following week. It certainly looks like this meeting is going to be a very positive experience and my wife will have stories, information and photographs and a place to go to visit her birth parent's graves. I will update the forum after we meet,

many thanks,

Wittner

justagirl

Best wishes to you both for the first family meeting.

You are not alone regarding not knowing how the 'system' works - I am baffled also. On a positive note your Wife has found her family - that is great.

Wittner wrote: »

Well,



the social worker has finally found my wife's birth mother. After 3 years, incorrect names on paperwork in Bessborough, incorrect names on the Adoption agency paperwork and incorrect names on my wife's birth cert and incorrect ages for the birth mother, we have finally gotten an answer. Unfortunately my wife's birth mother died about 10 years ago but it looks like we will get to meet at least one of her uncles, who seems very keen to know more and it seems he may also know the identity of her birth father (although he has also sadly passed). It will be nice to get closure and for my kids to know something more of their past history.

Amazingly, the case had been closed about 2 months ago after a couple of dead-ends and only after my wife wrote to Bessborough asking if any of the older nuns might remember anything of her mother, that the HSE 'noticed' another name on the paperwork and decided to re-open the case.

I am none the wiser as to how this whole system works. Personally I am embittered of this state system that yet again supported lies and deceit through legal and other more sneaky methods. I am also glad that my wife has the information she has wanted and searched for so long.

Many thanks to the helpful people on this forum for their understanding, support and knowledge. My wife has often taken comfort and solice from reading from this forum. We are due to meet the social worker next week and then hopefully my wife's uncle and his wife the following week. It certainly looks like this meeting is going to be a very positive experience and my wife will have stories, information and photographs and a place to go to visit her birth parent's graves. I will update the forum after we meet,

many thanks,

Wittner

Wittner

Thanks justagirl for your wishes, and thanks to all others who thanked! My wife and I will be meeting 5 of the family next week - Uncles, aunts and a cousin! Very exciting :-)

justagirl

Wittner wrote: »

Thanks justagirl for your wishes, and thanks to all others who thanked! My wife and I will be meeting 5 of the family next week - Uncles, aunts and a cousin! Very exciting :-)

How exciting for all of you - that is just super, your wife will now be able to share photos/family traits etc, that is priceless. Please let us know how you get on.

I myself cannot find my original birth cert - it doesn't seem to exist even thought I know my date of birth, BM full name, where I was born !!! but thats an entirely different thread for another day - I am just heartened to hear some one has finally gotten through the obscure impossible religion led state bodies/independent agencies and got the information they are entitled to - bravo

Moonbeam

Fantastic news:)) i hope all goes well.

Wittner

Well, we have met with some of my wife's birth family and what a great experience. They are gorgeous people. They were shocked about the whole story and this was all news to them. They have treated the news of my wife's existence as one of the biggest, most positive events in the family history. We were both overwhelmed by their good nature and generosity. Uncles, aunts and cousins have been phoning out of the blue, anxious to meet. Just a great experience. I'm so happy for my wife and I am delighted that our kids have also learned something of a family history that was otherwise denied them.

Now were on a search for her birth father. Here we go again!! :-)

cheers,

Wittner