Anybody here ever dated a muslim?

Encrustment

She's awesome.

I don't know what the f*k I'm doing. She's currently observing Ramadan (therefore no dating) so I have until early August to decide whether to finish it or not.

She asked me if I believed in god and I said no, which she didn't seem to mind at all.

Any advice?

Sulla Felix

I'd date a moderate Muslim before I'd date a fundamentalist Christian, but no, not yet.
I do know a few though. They go to the pub, some drink some don't, but they all go. Some of them do the daily prayer thing, some don't. Really, they're just people. :P

stevejazzx

I think how these things are supposed to work is you figuring out if you like her or not?
Don't let religion get in the way just yet, you could regret not trying, you can get out later on - so for now why not go with it? Best of Luck

Encrustment

I like her a lot! We've been on four dates already, and she likes me a lot too. I've been googling "how to date islam woman" and the general consensus from muslim forums is that the woman must try her hardest to convert the boyfriend to islam otherwise it's doomed. She goes to the pub (doesn't drink though). She is quite moderate. Doesn't wear any sort of hijab. She wore very tight fitting leggings on our 2nd "date". I could tell she had a nice bum :P

Anyway... I'll have to bite the bullet and ask her about the conversion thing.

TheChizler

Encrustment wrote: »

Anyway... I'll have to bite the bullet and ask her about the conversion thing.

Em... I wouldn't jump right in with that! Maybe more how do you feel about our differing religious perspectives?

Turtwig

Encrustment wrote: »

Anyway... I'll have to bite the bullet and ask her about the conversion thing.

Jesus you'd be mad to do that! Unless you're convinced she's a devout follower who's visually upset that you're not a Muslim. Judging by your OP she's not that type of Muslim.She might just be a Muslim by the merest of traditions and nothing more. In fact, I'd wager that if she was to post in those forums you mentioned about her predictament of having a bf who's non muslim she'd be shot down at every turn. The thing you have to ask yourself is would she agree with them shooting her down? If not, then the fact she's muslim will probably have little bearing on any potential relationship that may develop between the two of you. Until the extended families on both sides get involved. . .

Wish you the best of luck.

Benny_Cake

Encrustment wrote: »

She's awesome.

I don't know what the f*k I'm doing. She's currently observing Ramadan (therefore no dating) so I have until early August to decide whether to finish it or not.

She asked me if I believed in god and I said no, which she didn't seem to mind at all.

Any advice?

I wouldn't leap to the conclusion that your choices are to convert or to finish it. It sounds like she is fairly moderate, perhaps culturally Muslim? The part of the world her family is from originally would be telling - generally there would be a big difference between someone from Bosnia or Turkey vs someone from Saudi Arabia or Pakistan. If you were to talk to here about it I'd present it as more of an exercise in finding out what her views are rather than asking if she'd like you to convert. Her family might be an issue down the line, but families can always be an issue anyway, even if you're dating someone down the road.

One thing I wouldn't do is lend too much credence to the responses you might read on Muslim forums. Religious forums (and atheist forums - not here of course!) often attract the most intransigent types, I've seen Catholic forums where people would argue that the pope wasn't a Catholic!

Encrustment wrote: »

I could tell she had a nice bum :P

Ultimately, isn't that what truly matters?

Banbh

I would be more concerned about male relatives and how. devout they are.
If they are religious, run for your life

Tails142

Is that a bit like proposing on the 5th date? Not gonna scare her off at all....

Encrustment

I don't want to marry ... but you know. In order to .. ahem... "mount her" I must be muslim and married to her. Look my natural instincts are driving me insane, I just want advice - perhaps a loophole? Some roundabout interpretation of the quran that actually says having an atheist in the family is beneficial?

Because down the line I can see some problems. We are stilll messaging eachother a million times a day on facebook but if it's all going to hit a brick wall I don't want to waste any more time for either of us.

Banbh

You clearly have no respect for this woman <SNIP>

kylith

Encrustment wrote: »

I don't want to marry ... but you know. In order to .. ahem... "mount her" I must be muslim and married to her. Look my natural instincts are driving me insane, I just want advice - perhaps a loophole? Some roundabout interpretation of the quran that actually says having an atheist in the family is beneficial?

Because down the line I can see some problems. We are stilll messaging eachother a million times a day on facebook but if it's all going to hit a brick wall I don't want to waste any more time for either of us.

We've already said that she may be a cultural muslim rather than being religious. You never know, she could be all kinds of up for some bedroom antics but we have no idea. Go talk to her! 'I really like you, but I'm worried that our different religious outlooks could cause trouble down the road' would probably do the trick.

MagicMarker

Get a horse and you can "mount her" all you like.

edit: Make sure it's a non Muslim horse.

Coles

I'm inclined to agree with Banbh. It's likely that the OP will ruin any chance of a proper relationship before it even develops, but best of luck anyway.

old_aussie

stevejazzx wrote: »

I
Don't let religion get in the way just yet, you could regret not trying, you can get out later on - so for now why not go with it? Best of Luck

You don't get any refund on the dowery.

Don't let this happen to her, it's far to common.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-200315/Cousins-killed-Muslim-bride-jailed.html

Kold

Just play it the same as a christian girl. Many of them say they'll wait for marriage and like.. Lol. Women have sexual urges too, Im sure you'll work something out. My only advice is that most people want to be treated as an individual, not as a product of where theyre from or what they believe.

Dis PI mang.

Dades

Coles wrote: »

I'm inclined to agree with Banbh. It's likely that the OP will ruin any chance of a proper relationship before it even develops, but best of luck anyway.

And hopefully before any more reputational damage is done to either.

Encrustment

Folks she has already hinted/flirted about sleeping with me. Let's not get personal.

Anyway, a mod can lock this thread now.

Banbh

Encrustment: I don't know what the f*k I'm doing.

I do and it's shameful.