Alcohol intake: surpassing (and frightening) myself

LegacyUser

Yesterday, I surpassed myself with my alcohol intake and I'm in shock. I drank 7 litres of Medium Cider (4.5%) and 2 litres of stout (4.2%), starting at 11am and finishing before 1am. 9 litres. One day. One person.
I drank more in one day than the per capita consumption of beer per year - per year - in India (according to this).

I'm 40 years of age, so this is a turning point. I'm on holidays, and have absolutely nothing to do except enjoy a long-deserved break from work and exams. My wife would be in shock if she knew how much I drank, because as I said even I am in shock. I am drinking too much overall, having gone back on it heavier than ever in the past two months (I had been off it completely for the previous 5 months until exams and work pressure receded). I keep thinking I can do "moderation" but I plainly cannot. I have no restraints, just a desire to escape and drink until I can drink no more. It's that "all or nothing" destructive thinking. My big, big, big problem is that in my stupid, doltish head I cannot stop equating "relaxing" with "drinking". I just cannot seem to be relaxed without this immersion into alcohol abuse. Getting into this drinking zone is the aim, it's when all my stress and tension can be released. This is self-destruct mode, and I know if I don't change this thinking now, I will lose all.

How can somebody stop associating alcohol with relaxation and start associating positive, healthy things with relaxation? Breaking this association is my first task, I think. Also, for people who have managed to turn their back on alcohol do you ever get to the stage where you can relax and enjoy yourself without this, or is the longing always there for drink even ten years down the road? I really fear that it will be and I'll be destined for a life of emptiness and grumpiness ("dry drunk" apparently such people are called - and I don't ever want to be like that) without having my current escape route. I need new thinking. Thank you.

Esoteric_

One massive binge, I'd call stupidity rather than a 'problem,' but from everything else you've said, you clearly have a problem with alcohol. You equating relaxing with drinking, that's really, really unhealthy. As you said yourself, you need other things to do to relax, to help you to stop thinking about drink as a relaxation mechanism.

I'm not calling you an alcoholic, but you clearly are aware that you have a problem and need to stop the excessive drinking. Have you considered going to an AA meeting? They are somewhat spiritual in nature, but it might help you to figure out the reasons why you think relaxing and drinking go hand in hand. If that's not your thing, something like perhaps Cognitive Behavioural Therapy or even counselling, both of which can be arranged through your GP.

I'm not a particularly heavy drinker, although I've been quite dependent on it in the past (a few years ago, I'd drink two bottles of wine for 'pre' drinks, then go clubbing and drink more, about 4 times per week). Now, I'd usually drink about once a week, but I think I've only been drinking twice in as many months lately, and I haven't missed it in the slightest, because I have other things I can do to have fun or relax, which is what you need to learn to do.

First port of call should be your GP, to see what options are available to you.

Admitting that alcohol and the way you see alcohol is an issue, is the first step to sorting it out, so I wish you the best of luck.

amber69

éadóchas wrote: »

Yesterday, I surpassed myself with my alcohol intake and I'm in shock. I drank 7 litres of Medium Cider (4.5%) and 2 litres of stout (4.2%), starting at 11am and finishing before 1am. 9 litres. One day. One person.
I drank more in one day than the per capita consumption of beer per year - per year - in India (according to this).

I'm 40 years of age, so this is a turning point. I'm on holidays, and have absolutely nothing to do except enjoy a long-deserved break from work and exams. My wife would be in shock if she knew how much I drank, because as I said even I am in shock. I am drinking too much overall, having gone back on it heavier than ever in the past two months (I had been off it completely for the previous 5 months until exams and work pressure receded). I keep thinking I can do "moderation" but I plainly cannot. I have no restraints, just a desire to escape and drink until I can drink no more. It's that "all or nothing" destructive thinking. My big, big, big problem is that in my stupid, doltish head I cannot stop equating "relaxing" with "drinking". I just cannot seem to be relaxed without this immersion into alcohol abuse. Getting into this drinking zone is the aim, it's when all my stress and tension can be released. This is self-destruct mode, and I know if I don't change this thinking now, I will lose all.

How can somebody stop associating alcohol with relaxation and start associating positive, healthy things with relaxation? Breaking this association is my first task, I think. Also, for people who have managed to turn their back on alcohol do you ever get to the stage where you can relax and enjoy yourself without this, or is the longing always there for drink even ten years down the road? I really fear that it will be and I'll be destined for a life of emptiness and grumpiness ("dry drunk" apparently such people are called - and I don't ever want to be like that) without having my current escape route. I need new thinking. Thank you.

Lightweight

shadowcomplex

Its alot alright but I'd be more concerned of you were drinking hard drinks

Micky Dolenz

The most important thing is if you think it's an issue, then you need to address it.

To me, that is a just a bit of a binje. So don't beat yourself up too much.

Give the booze a break for a while, if you find that difficult to do, it may be worth contacting AA or other support networks anonymously.

Best of luck.

padz

i think drinkin early is the problem, its easy with the good weather, i try not drink till 9pm, in sayin that i could still drink 10pints or more, but ya drinking durin the day fecks ye up,

im livin in a town center people fallin about outside me window and im not on a very busy street they were prob drinkin all day

bp

There is a non - drinkers section on boards. You could try posting there looking for alternative relaxation methods

mikemac1

Stop beating yourself up. You were off the drink for 5 months and you just had a massive session.

And you regret it but that's fine. Just take another break.

The fact that you know the annual consumption of the average Indian shows you are over thinking it. Nobody knows that stat!

Ickle Magoo

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tinkerbell

OP, you clearly have a problem with alcohol. I suggest you talk to your GP and go to AA. Admitting it is the first step. Good luck.

The_Conductor

You say you associate alcohol consumption with relaxation- this is a link you have to break. There are no shortage of ways to sit back and relax- that don't include alcohol. If you can't drink alcohol in moderation- then, you have a problem, and to be honest- if you're 40, its something you need to address now- before it ruins not just your life, but the lives of others too.

You can get help- from the likes of AA, or you can choose to go-it alone, if you have sufficient will-power to do so. You do need to address this though.

Personally- I'd seriously suggest looking up the AA- as you're in a group of people who help and support one another (and while I'm not sure whether they socialise together or not- if they do, it will obviously be without the all pervasive crutch of alcohol)

You need to have a serious think about what you're doing- and how you're going to address it.