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Writing letter to mother for own sanity - good or bad idea

  • 01-07-2013 1:46pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey,

    Will keep this as brief as possible. My mam is an alcoholic, nearly 3 years sober. She is hanging around with an absolute scumbag for the last few years, thought when she stopped drinking he'd be off the scene but he's not and he's back drinking. I'm not speaking to her at the minute and have brought this to the attention of some family members as i'm warn out carrying the stress of this on my own shoulders. I'm seeing a counsellor for this and some other problems, and she spoke about sending a letter to my mam. I didn't want to do this as I pictured her and your man laughing at it and didn't want to leave myself vulnerable, or put my feelings out there like that. I always thought she'd see sense eventually but am finally copping on that this might not happen, so have to think of myself and my siblings now. I can not get to a place where I can accept this, so just want to be able to see my younger sibling who lives at home and don't really want a relationship with my mam at the minute. I'm thinking of sending her a message on facebook with everything I need to say. This is for my own sanity as much as anything and to get some sort of closure I guess, and who knows it might actually hit home, but i'm not holding my breath. I never get to discuss this as i'm dismissed, as if there's no problem etc, she actually told people i'm nothing but a drama queen. I could go in to all the details of what he's done here but don't think it will serve any purpose. Any advice greatly appreciated


Comments

  • #2
    Big Bag of Chips
    Administrators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 14,907 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    OP, I am very sorry to have to do this, but after discussing with my CoMods, we have decided that we cannot allow this thread to be approved and remain open.

    You have been given advice from your counsellor, who is professionally trained and better acquainted with your history and family issues than anyone here. We feel it would be very inappropriate to allow the thread to remain open thus allowing you to hear advice that may be at odds with what your counsellor recommends for you. Only you can decide if you take the advice of your counsellor or not.

    If you feel you are not getting the most from your counselling and not making the progress you would like in your life, maybe it is time to look at trying something new or different, even a different counsellor. Sometimes it takes visiting a few to find one you are happy with and who you gel with. But this is all something that you need to be discussing with your counsellor or/and your GP, not here on PI.

    Again, I am very sorry to have to do this, and I wish you well. But the fact that you keep returning to PI with the same issues makes us believe that nothing more can be offered to you by the posters here, and you need to look further for help.

    Take care,
    Big Bag of Chips


This discussion has been closed.
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