Work colleagues holding a baby shower. I'm the only male in the group, don't wanna go

LegacyUser

There are about ten of us in the work "team", and I'm the only guy. They're holding a baby shower (with lots of baby shower party games) for one of my colleagues and I'm expected to go. Being the only man in the group, I'd really prefer not to. It's disguised as a team meeting so the expectant lady just thinks it's a team building thing. It's being held in one of the women's houses.

I've already donated money towards a gift ... would it be rude for me to say "Listen... my head would be absolutely wrecked at this thing. You can count me out" ... ?

I'm going to be surrounded by 9 screaming & drunk auld wans.

How can I get out of this without being seen as "letting down the team" ????

I feel like I'm going to a hen party. Help me

BuffyBot

"I'm sorry but I have an appointment/long lost cousin John is home from the Antartic that day/evening..hope you have fun!"etc.

Don't over think it..

gramar

I work with 3 women who get together with 2 other women who used to work here every now and then and they always ask me to go. It's probably more out of politeness that they ask me than anything else as they talk about it in front of me.

Like you I'd be the only male there and I always politely decline saying they would have better fun without me. I don't bother with making up excuses. I think any group of 9 women would understand why you wouldn't want to go to a baby shower.

desbrook

Well it's not going to be a weekly occurrence so an excuse will do the job. The sad truth is you are almost certainly being asked out of politeness so any excuse you come up with will be readily taken.
The other option is just decline saying " you'll cramp their style " but hope they all have a great time. Again they probably prefer you don't go anyway so there'll be a little "Are you sure? It won't be the same without you " but not much! !

Mrs OBumble

They're probably all praying that you decline the invitation!

Honey-ec

Just say you don't think it's really your thing and don't go. I'm female and I wouldn't go to a baby shower, it would be my idea of hell. You've already contributed to the gift, that's more than enough.

howamidifferent

Are they allowed to clean babies in your workplace?

Owryan

Had a similar quandry a few years ago . Donated a couple of bottles of wine as an apology for not being able to attend .

Its a small gesture and ll help save both face and any akwardness maybe ?

tatli_lokma

Do people have wine at baby showers??? What about the poor mammy-to-be sitting there all big as a house and can't even have a tipple whilst everyone else gets drunk??? That sounds very unfair to me!

OP, as others have said, its a social event not a work authorised event, so there is no obligation on you to go and I doubt very much anyone would think badly of you for saying thanks but no thanks.

murphym7

I feel your pain buddy, I work in a global team but I am based in an office with all women. I dont work with them directly but for all intents and purposes they are my "work mates". I pretty much go to 1 out 5 invites just to be polite. They know hwat I am like at this stage and it becomes a bit of an office joke at this stage. If I was invited to something like this it would be a straight NO, I would not even offer an explanation why. They should know that it is unfair to expect one man to attend this. I would not sweat it, just say no. I don't think any resonable women would mind at all.