Would you date a girl who...

ippn1

...cheated in the past (when she was 18 and is 22 now)

Her 1st BF of 2 years cheated on her so they broke up. After 1 month she started dating new BF and after a while she figured out she didt get over her 1st BF so she cheated her new BF with her 1st BF.
She said she will never forgive herself for what she did to her 2nd BF.

I figured out she isnt completely over her last bf since we have been dating - 1 month.
Then we went NC for a month but last week she saw me at the party and contact me the next day...

ElleEm

So are you afraid she is going to cheat on you?

HalloweenJack

If you really want to be with her, you just have to trust her.

Four years is also a long time, people develop a lot from the age of 18 onwards.

When I was 17, I had a long-term relationship with my first GF. I cheated on her a few times. However, since we broke up, I've been in three serious long-term relationships and I haven't cheated again, eight years later.

So people can change and if you want to be with her, you'll have to take the chance and trust her. If you can't trust her, you're better off ending it.

How did you figure out she isn't over her last BF? If you really believe this, why are you still in a relationship with someone who's in love with someone else? It'll do no good for you in the long run.

Lux23

I would be very reluctant to judge someone based on something they did when they were 18, for instance I know my boyfriend cheated on his first proper girlfriend when he was 19 or so (he's nearly 28 now), but I wouldn't for a second think that means he will cheat on me.

LegacyUser

While no one can say with certainty that she will or won't cheat on you, I wouldn't base your worry on her past behaviour as a teenager (Yes, legally an adult, but mentally??)

I've had 3 boyfriends. I cheated on 2, when I was 18 and 19 respectively. It was a horrible, horrible thing to do - but, I did it. I've been with my current boyfriend for 4 years, I'm 25 years old and I've never cheated on him, nor have I even been tempted to. I've grown up, and I'm in a loving relationship that I'm happy in and that's the most important thing to me. I wouldn't like to be judged on my behaviour in the past, because that's not who I am now. People say "cheaters never change" etc. but there's a different between an 18 year old making a mistake (or two!), and a 40 year old who's serial cheated in every relationship they've been in!

If you're worried she's not over her previous boyfriend, then that's another issue but you should deal with it separately. If you decide to trust her, then do just that - trust her.

DonQuigleone

People make mistakes. She clearly regrets it, and if she was really a "cheater" she wouldn't have told you in the first place.

Forgive and forget. And from what you said, she didn't seem to do it out of any malice, but more likely out of misplaced affection for her jerk of a first boyfriend. Love makes people behave in odd ways.

Also, if you think she's still not over the last BF I wouldn't worry too much. For one thing, you're not marrying her, and for another, a lot of the time the last lover is only really "forgotten" when the next one comes along.