Obligations of an Executor

changeling

Hi

My brother-in-law was made executor to my late father's will. My father died last November.

My bro in law gave copies of the will to my mother to hand out to me and my other siblings, obviously his own wife (my eldest sister) would have already gotten her copy.

My mother has been in possession of these copies now for over six weeks or more.
I don't know why she is holding onto them, but my issue is this - should the executor not have furnished us with our copies himself? If only out of courtesy and respect for us the children? Why give them to our mother? Especially since our eldest sister is now the only one with a copy? Why aren't the rest of us entitled to this same courtesy?

CIARAN_BOYLE

changeling wrote: »

Hi

My brother-in-law was made executor to my late father's will. My father died last November.

My bro in law gave copies of the will to my mother to hand out to me and my other siblings, obviously his own wife (my eldest sister) would have already gotten her copy.

My mother has been in possession of these copies now for over six weeks or more.
I don't know why she is holding onto them, but my issue is this - should the executor not have furnished us with our copies himself? If only out of courtesy and respect for us the children? Why give them to our mother? Especially since our eldest sister is now the only one with a copy? Why aren't the rest of us entitled to this same courtesy?

You don't legally have to have a copy of the will. You have no legal right to see it until it goes through probate. If you want to see it, ask the executor. Otherwise wait for it to go through probate and then you can get a copy easy enough.

He doesn't have an obligation to give it to you and your mother doesn't have an obligation to pass it on.

changeling

Is it normal to have a family member as an executor? Would it not be a conflict of interest ?

valleyoftheunos

Perfectly normal, conflicts of interest can arise but only in specific circumstances and these are usually identified and avoided at the will drafting stage.

The duties placed on an Executor are onerous and there are laws in place to ensure they administer the estate as they should. Do be aware that it can be a slow process and the Executor will normally have at least a full year to distribute gifts and bequests to beneficiaries.

Stereomaniac

I find it very unusual however, that the executor is in this case the son in law, and not a son or daughter. But surely if the OP contacts the brother in law and just asks to see the will, then there shouldn't be much problem. If problems arise at that stage, then it gets messy?

changeling

Stereomaniac wrote: »

I find it very unusual however, that the executor is in this case the son in law, and not a son or daughter. But surely if the OP contacts the brother in law and just asks to see the will, then there shouldn't be much problem. If problems arise at that stage, then it gets messy?

In this case it may as well be my eldest sister who is executor as her husband will only do what she tells him to do, and in my opinion, correct me if I'm wrong, it surely is a conflict of interest to have a son or daughter as executor.

Relations between my eldest sister and myself have completely broken down and am not in a position to contact them to request a copy, my point really is why should I have to request one, ok maybe not legally entitled to get one yet as probate is still going through, but to be given a copy out of common courtesy. However I should know better than to expect any courtesy from them, the whole set up is just an extension really of how they have been grooming my parents emotional dependence for years

valleyoftheunos

Stereomaniac wrote: »

I find it very unusual however, that the executor is in this case the son in law, and not a son or daughter. But surely if the OP contacts the brother in law and just asks to see the will, then there shouldn't be much problem. If problems arise at that stage, then it gets messy?

It might be uncommon to select a Son in law but there is nothing necessarily untoward about it.

the OP has no entitlement to see the Will untill such time as probate is granted and the will becomes a public document. I would think the easiest way would be for the OP to ask her mother for the copy of the Will she never passed on?

source

Stereomaniac wrote: »

I find it very unusual however, that the executor is in this case the son in law, and not a son or daughter. But surely if the OP contacts the brother in law and just asks to see the will, then there shouldn't be much problem. If problems arise at that stage, then it gets messy?

In my experience an executor cannot be a direct beneficiary of the will they are executing.

So son or daughter would not be executor, but son in law can be as he is not directly benefiting from the will.

valleyoftheunos

changeling wrote: »

In this case it may as well be my eldest sister who is executor as her husband will only do what she tells him to do, and in my opinion, correct me if I'm wrong, it surely is a conflict of interest to have a son or daughter as executor.

Relations between my eldest sister and myself have completely broken down and am not in a position to contact them to request a copy, my point really is why should I have to request one, ok maybe not legally entitled to get one yet as probate is still going through, but to be given a copy out of common courtesy. However I should know better than to expect any courtesy from them, the whole set up is just an extension really of how they have been grooming my parents emotional dependence for years

It is not a conflict of interest, the executor's job is to distribute the Estate as directed in the Will, they aren't legally able to do anything else. A Son or Daughter is usually the most appropriate person to be chosen as Executor.

You clearly have a difficult family situation, I would suggest that both you and your sister are best served by engaging in dialogue and communication. Best of Luck.

valleyoftheunos

source wrote: »

In my experience an executor cannot be a direct beneficiary of the will they are executing.

So son or daughter would not be executor, but son in law can be as he is not directly benefiting from the will.

I think you are confusing being an executor with being a witness to a Will, a witness to a Will or their spouse cannot benefit from the Will.

changeling

valleyoftheunos wrote: »

It might be uncommon to select a Son in law but there is nothing necessarily untoward about it.

the OP has no entitlement to see the Will untill such time as probate is granted and the will becomes a public document. I would think the easiest way would be for the OP to ask her mother for the copy of the Will she never passed on?

Yes I have already asked my mother for a copy and stressed to her the unfairness of the whole situation, regarding how my eldest sister has full knowledge of the will and the rest of us don't. Her answer was that she would find it too upsetting to hand it out to us just yet Also my dad didn't put my mother's name on anything, there is a lot of land involved and I think she just wants to get everything sorted first, at least that is what I tell myself. The fact that one sibling is treated differently to another is enormously hurtful no matter what age one is.

changeling

changeling wrote: »

In this case it may as well be my eldest sister who is executor as her husband will only do what she tells him to do, and in my opinion, correct me if I'm wrong, it surely is a conflict of interest to have a son or daughter as executor.

Relations between my eldest sister and myself have completely broken down and am not in a position to contact them to request a copy, my point really is why should I have to request one, ok maybe not legally entitled to get one yet as probate is still going through, but to be given a copy out of common courtesy. However I should know better than to expect any courtesy from them, the whole set up is just an extension really of how they have been grooming my parents emotional dependence for years

If the executor feels he/she cannot carry out their duties, they can appoint someone else to do so. The old fashioned way was for the Husband (of a daughter) to be appointed, rather than the daughter herself, in the absence of a son. I'm sure that if you apply in writing via the solicitor concerned, you will get a copy.

changeling

Deleted User wrote: »

If the executor feels he/she cannot carry out their duties, they can appoint someone else to do so. The old fashioned way was for the Husband (of a daughter) to be appointed, rather than the daughter herself, in the absence of a son. I'm sure that if you apply in writing via the solicitor concerned, you will get a copy.

Thanks but to be perfectly honest I'm not that interested in even seeing it, I am just very upset at the manner in which the whole thing has been handled by all concerned. I have an older brother, my mother tells me he wasn't named as executor as my bro in law is an engineer and as there has to be lots of plans etc to be handed in for transfer of ownership to my mother it was considered best to name him as executor as he would take care of all of that. His wife, my eldest sister, is a doctor, a pillar of the community one would think, but their offhand and shoddy treatment of the rest of us is truly eyeopening.

coylemj

changeling wrote: »

I have an older brother, my mother tells me he wasn't named as executor as my bro in law is an engineer and as there has to be lots of plans etc to be handed in for transfer of ownership to my mother it was considered best to name him as executor as he would take care of all of that.

Self-serving nonsense, you need a solicitor not an engineer to do transfer of ownership. Even if your brother in law is doing personal probate he won't get next or near plans of the land and if he's giving the probate to a solicitor, he'll have to do nothing except sign lots of documents the solicitor will put in front of him.

OP, this is an issue with family relationships, you haven't identified any legal issues. Your father could have named anyone as executor, whether they were a relative or not and regardless of whether they or their spouse are beneficiaries in the will.

The law only recognises a potential 'conflict of interest' when it comes to witnesses so as already stated, a witness and his/her spouse are not allowed to inherit but there is no such restriction when it comes to the executor.

If you can't sort this out within the family then you'll have to speak to a solicitor but I can't see how anyone on this forum can help you. At the end of the day the executor can blank you out while he is applying for probate and you can do nothing about it.

changeling

coylemj wrote: »

Self-serving nonsense, you need a solicitor not an engineer to do transfer of ownership. Even if your brother in law is doing personal probate he won't get next or near plans of the land and if he's giving the probate to a solicitor, he'll have to do nothing except sign lots of documents the solicitor will put in front of him.

OP, this is an issue with family relationships, you haven't identified any legal issues. Your father could have named anyone as executor, whether they were a relative or not and regardless of whether they or their spouse are beneficiaries in the will.

The law only recognises a potential 'conflict of interest' when it comes to witnesses so as already stated, a witness and his/her spouse are not allowed to inherit but there is no such restriction when it comes to the executor.

If you can't sort this out within the family then you'll have to speak to a solicitor but I can't see how anyone on this forum can help you. At the end of the day the executor can blank you out while he is applying for probate and you can do nothing about it.

The legal issue for me was whether or not I was entitled to have a copy of the will given to me by the executor in a straightforward manner, and not as it was handed to my mother to be distributed to us.
This has been answered for me here.

What do you mean by self serving? Do you mean my mother? Thanks.
If so , then you are correct. Which leads me to ask, my brother in law then cannot be drawing up the land measurements for the solicitor as he is an executor? This was the reason he was made executor according to my mother and not my brother because he has the qualifications to do this, and would save the cost of employing somebody to do it for her.

coylemj

The plans for the land already exist, nobody is going to have to go out with a measuring tape and draw up new plans if the land is going to be transferred to your mother. You were quoting your mother when you mentioned the supposed justification for the brother in law being made executor (because he's an engineer), I suspect your sister has convinced your mother that this makes sense when I see no merit in it at all, he will not require any engineering skills to administer the estate.

Your sister and brother in law seem to be hiding behind your mother when it comes to revealing to their other siblings what's in the will. From what you have said, they appear to have dumped copies of the will on your mother and now when asked for a copy of the will, they are referring members of the family to the mother which is a pretty cowardly way of doing it.

But as you appear to now accept, you cannot force them to give you a copy of the will.

source

valleyoftheunos wrote: »

I think you are confusing being an executor with being a witness to a Will, a witness to a Will or their spouse cannot benefit from the Will.

Really? I'll have to look into that further, I was given bad advice it seems.

changeling

coylemj wrote: »

The plans for the land already exist, nobody is going to have to go out with a measuring tape and draw up new plans if the land is going to be transferred to your mother. You were quoting your mother when you mentioned the supposed justification for the brother in law being made executor (because he's an engineer), I suspect your sister has convinced your mother that this makes sense when I see no merit in it at all, he will not require any engineering skills to administer the estate.

Your sister and brother in law seem to be hiding behind your mother when it comes to revealing to their other siblings what's in the will. From what you have said, they appear to have dumped copies of the will on your mother and now when asked for a copy of the will, they are referring members of the family to the mother which is a pretty cowardly way of doing it.

But as you appear to now accept, you cannot force them to give you a copy of the will.

Many thanks for this, You have confirmed my suspicions.

2breal

has the will gone into probate? If so you can have your solicitor obtain a copy. Can you not ask brother in law for another copy? Treat it like a business transaction and don't get emotional, have your solicitor do the work. Its odd i never realized that they are your family until there is a will involved then its seems its every person for themselves. Good luck.

nuac

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Old thread. Closed to avoid duplication