Is 12 too young to use Dublin Bus by himself?

BenEadir

Hi all,

My 12 year old son is confident, outgoing and starting secondary school in September. He plays a lot of sport locally but is a member of one club which is about 20 minutes away by car. I always drop and collect him but I was thinking it might be an ideal opportunity to let him get the bus by himself and let him spread his wings a bit. There is a bus stop near our house which would require him crossing a busy road at traffic lights to catch and the same bus goes all the way to the area the club is in leaving him a 3/4 minute walk to the clubhouse involving another road crossing at traffic lights.

What do experienced parents here think? The trip would basically be from Sandyford to Dun Laoghaire and back. I'd plan to do the first trip with him myself and then, on days when it wasn't raining (???) and/or it was difficult for me to bring him I'd let him off on his own. He has a phone etc and is a confident kid so I know he'd jump at the idea if I suggested it but I don't want to do it if he's still a bit young. My main concern would be other lads seeing him as an easy target for stealing his stuff or just bullying him.

I always tend to err on the side of letting him do stuff. That was how I was brought up and I generally believe in letting kids spread their wings and take responsibility early rather then wrapping them in cotton wool but not too early!!

Appreciate your thoughts.

Ben

January

I was using the bus by myself at that age to go to and from school (Mulhuddart - Finglas) so if you think you can trust him. Warn him to only cross when the lights are in his favour and to make sure any cars approaching are stopped before stepping out onto the road he should be fine.

saltyjack silverblade

I grew up in the country. I used to get the bus home by myself from the time I was in 4th class. Let myself in the house and everything as both parents were working and the brother was in secondary school. Not a problem. Now with phones and everything it isn't too bad at all.
Piece of advice, don't be the mother at the bus stop standing outside waiting for him-that will make him a target.

The Princess Bride

Hi BenThere-
I would think it would depend on the 12 year old.
Some are mature,others aren't.

You say he is confident.
I think it is a good idea to go with him the first time-perhaps let him lead the way,and observe quietly from beside him.

I had a similar dilemma with my son,and wondering whether he should cycle alone to school.
Watching him tear off as if the Tour de France yellow jersey was at stake,
confirmed my fears-he wasn't quite ready yet!

youtube!

I used to get the bus at 10 yrs of age right into Dublin city (about 8 miles) never a problem, what parents tend to overlook these days is that kids of that age have a lot more cop on than we give them credit for.

Ask yourself this, would you have been capable of making the same journey yourself at that age without any particular problems? If your answer is in the affirmative then I think its perfectly logical and clear that your son whom you have said is a confident boy will also have no issues, it will build character and confidence within the boy....Let him at it. No need to be a helicopter parent.

BenEadir

Thanks all, you've confirmed my own gut instinct on the matter.

Btw, I'd never be the parent (father) waiting at the bus stop. I know how bad that would be for him.

Cheers

Ben

RustyNut

Hey OP it sounds like your Young Lad is well up to the task, we let our Girl start using the bus when she was in 5'th class. She is a confident kid and looked at it as a big adventure. We got her a leap card to keep it as easy as possible for her, just don't keep too much on it so it's no big deal if it gets lost.

LittleBook

January wrote: »

Warn him to only cross when the lights are in his favour and to make sure any cars approaching are stopped before stepping out onto the road he should be fine.

Please, PLEASE get this into his head. I live across the road from a football club and my heart is in my mouth watching the kids get off the same bus as me and run almost blindly into the road because they're late for practice or a match!

Also, I would advise him to take a seat downstairs on the bus, always.

BenEadir

Great advice Rusty and LittleBook. I'll do both.

Ben

Peregrinus

The real issue here is not other kids bullying him or stealing his stuff; the big risk is traffic.

What's his road sense like? Can you trust him to cross road, and to negotiate his way safely from the busstop to the sportsground? You'll know this better than we would.

If you're happy about that, then go for it. Any other issues, he will sort out.

And I'd let him go on the bus when it's raining. Why not? He won't melt. Just make sure he has a hat and a serviceable coat.

Peregrinus

The real issue here is not other kids bullying him or stealing his stuff; the big risk is traffic.

What's his road sense like? Can you trust him to cross road, and to negotiate his way safely from the busstop to the sportsground? You'll know this better than we would.

If you're happy about that, then go for it. Any other issues, he will sort out.

And I'd let him go on the bus when it's raining. Why not? He won't melt. Just make sure he has a hat and a serviceable coat.

simon0brien

BenThere wrote: »

Hi all,

My 12 year old son is confident, outgoing and starting secondary school in September. He plays a lot of sport locally but is a member of one club which is about 20 minutes away by car. I always drop and collect him but I was thinking it might be an ideal opportunity to let him get the bus by himself and let him spread his wings a bit. There is a bus stop near our house which would require him crossing a busy road at traffic lights to catch and the same bus goes all the way to the area the club is in leaving him a 3/4 minute walk to the clubhouse involving another road crossing at traffic lights.

What do experienced parents here think? The trip would basically be from Sandyford to Dun Laoghaire and back. I'd plan to do the first trip with him myself and then, on days when it wasn't raining (???) and/or it was difficult for me to bring him I'd let him off on his own. He has a phone etc and is a confident kid so I know he'd jump at the idea if I suggested it but I don't want to do it if he's still a bit young. My main concern would be other lads seeing him as an easy target for stealing his stuff or just bullying him.

I always tend to err on the side of letting him do stuff. That was how I was brought up and I generally believe in letting kids spread their wings and take responsibility early rather then wrapping them in cotton wool but not too early!!

Appreciate your thoughts.

Ben

I used the bus from school at 11. My dad told me to stay downstairs.

moochers

My son is almost 12 and going into 6th class. He has football training twice a week. I'm going to let him take the bus there and back starting in September. Very good advice re: staying downstairs on bus.

hfallada

Not at all. I went to a secondary school in town and children as young 9/10 years made their own way in on it. Even switching buses in town. At 8am in the morning and coming home at 4pm your hildren should experience any problems on the bus

lazygal

I got the bus every Saturday from the age of about 12, and had a 15 minute walk to and from where my classes were. Agree about staying downstairs. I'd make sure he has an extra ticket/change tucked away just in case anything gets lost and panic ensues.

moochers

Bring his phone too

CrazyRabbit

Phone + some kind of pepper spray and he's good to go.

RustyNut

CrazyRabbit wrote: »

Phone + some kind of pepper spray and he's good to go.

Arming kids going to school, sure what could go wrong.

CrazyRabbit

RustyNut wrote: »

Arming kids going to school, sure what could go wrong.

If it was the same school I went to...he'd need it.:D

Seriously though...so long as it's kept secure and out-of-sight it shouldn't be an issue.

lazygal

I don't know if this ^ is a joke but pepper spray is illegal in Ireland.

CrazyRabbit

lazygal wrote: »

I don't know if this ^ is a joke but pepper spray is illegal in Ireland.

Fair enough. If it's illegal, then obviously it's a no no. Perhaps just an generic aerosol of some kind. Basically, if attacked he'd have some way to fend off/confuse the attacker for a few moments so he could run/yell for help.

I'm really not trying to suggest giving him a deadly or dangerous weapon. Just something basic to deter attack.