Illicit dumping

schnitzelEater

Have you ever taken a dump somewhere you shouldn't have?

For example in your bosses desk drawer or in your room mates en suite toilet cistern?

Before anyone asks, I haven't. Although I may or may not have been the office phantom shi**er at one point.

Rastadoyle

on a mates porch

frag420

I did and I was inspired by this....

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xvCsELXB7nc

schnitzelEater

I should mention that I once pissed in a box of my own Crunch Nut Cornflakes that my house mate was treating himself to. (Needless to say I didn't eat any more after that).

scudzilla

Maybe 15yrs ago i was in need of a job for 6 months, just need anything (was back in Wales), so ended up working in a laundry, a big commercial thing.

Anyways, the boss was a tyrant, treated people like crap, sacked people on a whim.

His office overlooked the shop floor, he had a little tea area in it where he made his tea, i went up one sunday afternoon, half filled his kettle wit water and dumped a nice fresh log into it.

He walked in Monday morning, flicked his kettle on and sat at his desk, 4 minutes of scud's shite bubbling away and he was out of the room throwing up

not yet

Years ago the knut of a customer in pub I worked in was being a nasty fcuker to the lounge staff so I p1ssed in a pint glass and left it under the counter, A while later this clown walked up and ordered a pint of Bud....you can guess the rest.

amacca

No....I am proud to report i have never shat where I shouldn't have.

(I thought this was a thread about fly tipping/leaving rubbish where one shouldn't)

RealExpert

I drove a Lorry for a readymix concrete company and after "dumping" the load of concrete and returning to the depot I was in a bad way for a crap.I was just outside the town limits and I parked the lorry and got into the drum and had a dump of my own.I often heard of someone pissing in a bottle but having a sh*te in a bottle surely must be a record.............

For those that dont know it a readymix truck is known as a bottle.

keith16

I have never in my life, taken a dump anywhere other than in a toilet or in my pants. Happy now OP? You have made me tell the world that I shit my pants.

amacca

not yet wrote: »

you can guess the rest.

you didn't go through with it?

you handed it to him and he smelled that it was piss and threw it over you?

he greedily gulped down the first swig and promptly dropped dead?

there was another pint of piss under the counter from earlier and you gave him that one instead?

he became suspicious when you didn't fill his pint glass from the tap and called his mates who don't take too kindly to barmen tricking customers into drinking piss and they contacted the vintners association to register their outrage at such a thing happening

he drank it all in one go, smacked his lips and said "piss, worth waiting for"

he gave it to a drunker friend of his saying..here you go john, this stuff tastes like piss

before he could take the first swig a masked vigilante burst into the pub with a loaded crossbow and shattered the glass with an unnervingly accurate shot before ordering himself a coors light and checking the weather on a new iphone app he had downloaded

what man, what, what really happened...i cant stand not knowing!

thunderdog

Kidchameleon

I had a sh*t while driving my car once, I was bursting and a good few minutes from my house, on the M50. Couldn't hold it any longer, so sh*t me pants.

jprboy

Kidchameleon wrote: »

I had a sh*t while driving my car once, I was bursting and a good few minutes from my house, on the M50. Couldn't hold it any longer, so sh*t me pants.

Well, the M50 was constructed to ease congestion....

lost in cork

I got barred from a pub wrongly in my opinion so i came back after closing and had a nice big old dump on the landlords bonnet of his car

af_thefragile

jprboy wrote: »

Well, the M50 was constructed to ease congestion....

I see what you did there... :pac:

blacklilly

You're all disgusting people!