Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Know this is Hurting me. Help me Stop

  • 25-03-2013 10:54pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi there,

    Been involved with a guy for the last few months. It was a slow burn but have really grown to like him and we have so much fun together. It did bother me that I generally wouldn't hear from him between dates which could be a number of days. I mentioned to him that I would like more contact and he told that he would prefer to remain casual and that hes basically not good in relationships. It seems like he can be with people but remain very distant and not get too involved. I told him I get attached so this wasn't for me.We agreed to "be friends" as really I didn;t want to let him go if I am being honest and I suspected he didn;t either. We have met up several times since and not slept together but the attraction is still there. I guess I was hoping he would say he wanted to be with me and he missed "us" but I know he would never do this even if he felt it.

    The friends thing is a farce and i know it. from my side anyway. he is probably ok with it. If I completely pull the plug I know that will be it and I will never hear from him again and we spend a lot of time together and get on so well. When I am with him and his phone beeps I am wondering if he seeing someone new. I know I could not handle if he had someone new. He gave me a lift today and was talking about various places he was at the weekend and I played along but felt so upset.

    Should I just end the "friendship" now rather than hoping things will change? Is this a lost cause?


Comments

  • #2
    Brego888
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,321 ✭✭✭Brego888


    helppls wrote: »

    Should I just end the "friendship" now rather than hoping things will change? Is this a lost cause?

    You know the answer to this before you asked.

    Do yourself a favour and let this one go. You can't change people and the way he is is not going to work for you.


  • #3
    beks101
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,802 ✭✭✭beks101


    Yeah any "friendship" you have with this guy is just going to harm you because you'll always want more & he's just not able to give it.

    I know it seems so incredibly tough hun and you can't bear the thought of losing him from your life but you need to cut the chord now. The friendship is just keeping you hoping and he is going to start dating someone new at some point, do you really want to stick around to see that?

    He may well get serious with someone new too, Ive seen that happen with countless "non relationship" guys and you don't need to deal with that. You don't need his friendship & if you cut him out now you'll be cutting out a lot of misery & headfcuk too.


  • #4
    Merkin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,230 ✭✭✭Merkin


    You really need to rip off this plaster.It's not going to go anywhere and hanging out as friends is prolonging the pain and feeding the false hope.Just cut contact.


Advertisement