This is going to sound really dumb.

Sarz91

I've been with my current girlfriend for about 4 and 1/2 years. I was 17, so was she, and now were both close to going on 22. She's always there for me no matter what. You couldn't ask for someone better. I'd never do anything with anyone else or put myself in that position it's just not who I am and I respect her far too much.

The other day a coupe of mates asked me over to watch Project X. I'd never seen it before and I was doing nothing else so why not? I don't know how far in to the movie it was but this girl flashed across the screen for what must've been no more than 3 seconds. I rewound it back an paused it.

A couple of my mates in the room commented on how much the girl looked like my current girlfriend (I though so too that's why I rewound it.).

Since then though, this is the stupid part, I haven't been able to take my mind off her. I've never felt like this about anyone else while I've been with my girlfriend for the past 4 and 1/2 years.

I'm no fool. I know nothing will ever happen between me and some extra in a film but I just feel so, I dunno what it is. It's like I don't love my girlfriend as much or something. We'd be together and I just literally cannot stop thinking about this girl from the movie.

For anyone interested this is the girl. Yes, to my amazement there is a website about her.

I guess I'm just looking for anyone who's been or who is in the same position as me. Or just any advice at all.

smash

You're obsessing about an extra in a film who is the image of your real life gf? If you have it there on a platter then why obsess about the TV version?

ads20101

I know this sounds a bit crazy, but I think this is all quite normal op.

Fantasising whilst in a relationship is common. However you are attracted to who already looks like your partner.

You have been with your partner for a while now so you (and her) have got to know not just the good stuff but the bad stuff too.

Essentially, you are attracted to a type and because you don't really know this actress you are able to subconsciously project a perfect persona onto your perfect picture of a girlfriend.

Because she is a fantasy she will appear perfect in your minds eye, but if you actually got to date this mystery person she will end up normal, just like the person you're with.

Don't sweat it. It's perfectly ok.

Sarz91

ads20101 wrote: »

I know this sounds a bit crazy, but I think this is all quite normal op.

Fantasising whilst in a relationship is common. However you are attracted to who already looks like your partner.

You have been with your partner for a while now so you (and her) have got to know not just the good stuff but the bad stuff too.

Essentially, you are attracted to a type and because you don't really know this actress you are able to subconsciously project a perfect persona onto your perfect picture of a girlfriend.

Because she is a fantasy she will appear perfect in your minds eye, but if you actually got to date this mystery person she will end up normal, just like the person you're with.

Don't sweat it. It's perfectly ok.

Ye that makes sense. I just don't get why I'm so off with my girlfriend because of it. I dunno.

ads20101

Sarz91 wrote: »

Ye that makes sense. I just don't get why I'm so off with my girlfriend because of it. I dunno.

Because she's real.

She'll never be able to live up to this fantasy. Just like yourself she'll never be completely perfect.

You can let this eat you up and get all pissed that your gf isn't this other girl and let it damage your relationship or you can use it for a +ive and use this fantasy to spice up your existing relationship.

Sarz91

ads20101 wrote: »

Because she's real.

She'll never be able to live up to this fantasy. Just like yourself she'll never be completely perfect.

You can let this eat you up and get all pissed that your gf isn't this other girl and let it damage your relationship or you can use it for a +ive and use this fantasy to spice up your existing relationship.

Could it possibly just be a phase or something caused by stress? I'm in my final year in college studying engineering. I'm going to lie I'm pretty stressed out all the time. I haven't gone out out like to a club or bar in ages. Could that be part of the attraction? As in what the girl is doing rather than how she looks?

Taltos

OP - we have removed the link from your post - that is not necessary and is not appropriate to PI.

Slattsy - please read our charter - if you post in a similar style again you will force us to issue a warning / infraction and/or ban.

Thanks
Taltos

ads20101

Sarz91 wrote: »

Could it possibly just be a phase or something caused by stress? I'm in my final year in college studying engineering. I'm going to lie I'm pretty stressed out all the time. I haven't gone out out like to a club or bar in ages. Could that be part of the attraction? As in what the girl is doing rather than how she looks?

Don't underestimate it!!

Stress can be a swine. It's been a while since I was last an undergrad but I remember the stress damn well. Investing in a relationship kind of takes 2nd place during this intense time but your needs will still be there. It would be so easy to go for a cheap shag but whether or not you go down that road depends on how much you value your gf or how much you will risk getting caught.

Sarz91

ads20101 wrote: »

Don't underestimate it!!

Stress can be a swine. It's been a while since I was last an undergrad but I remember the stress damn well. Investing in a relationship kind of takes 2nd place during this intense time but your needs will still be there. It would be so easy to go for a cheap shag but whether or not you go down that road depends on how much you value your gf or how much you will risk getting caught.

No cheating isn't something I'd ever do to anyone. I've had it happen to me. I respect her far too much. I'll just chalk it down to stress (and the fact that the girl is hot) and just move on. Cheers for your advice on the matter. Finding out that it's normal was a big help. Hope it works out.

AnonoBoy

Setting up a website to try and track the girl down is odd to say the least.

It's one thing to fancy someone you see on TV but quite another to try and track her down online.

What on earth do you think is going to happen if you find out who she is?

Sarz91

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Setting up a website to try and track the girl down is odd to say the least.

It's one thing to fancy someone you see on TV but quite another to try and track her down online.

What on earth do you think is going to happen if you find out who she is?

I didn't set up the website. Me and a few mates were curious as to what her name was. We googled her and up popped that site. That's when I found out she was an extra.

Taltos

Closing this thread as OP has opened another one. Per our charter we ask folk not to start multiple threads in quick succession or they will be closed.