Job rut, worried about the future and my family

LegacyUser

Hi, I'm trying to preempt getting stuck in a rut regarding employment, providing for the family.

I actually posted before, in a similar situation and suggested forming a self-help group for unemployed people.

My concern is I'm getting very worried that I'll never have reliable employment or earn enough to provide for my wife's and soon-to-arrive child.

On the surface, things seem positive. I have a Masters, I'm intelligent, people say I have talents and have good work experience under my belt including a time working abroad for the government. Seems good.

But I've never managed to have long-term employment. It took me a long time to get my first job, and since then I've worked good jobs followed by major periods of unemployment. Year-on-year since 2008, I've earned less, and less, and less. With a child on the way, there's simply no possibility of saving money, putting money into a decent pension, buying and maintaining a car unless change happens. A galling, difficult decision may be turning my back on ten years of my working life.

I feel like a failure relative to many of my friends. And it really hurts me.

With regard to my earnings, I work in the charity sector where pay is very low and work very insecure.

On top of that, I feel I've been deskilling in my job (while also learning and staying connected with sector colleagues). But I also feel I've been losing confidence. I don't feel I'm good at my job. And I feel I have more to offer but can't see the opportunities. Having invested over ten years getting established in this sector, I feel no further along that road than ever before.

I lack confidence and am not great at managing stress, which in turn makes me scared to apply for certain jobs, which makes the situation worse. On the surface, people might find saying this strange, but it's true.

Another 'problem' is I'm quite good at many things (e.g. creative and analytical, etc.). From a personal view, I find it hard to work out what I'm best at and what sort of career path could be more for me. From a potential employer's point of view, they probably see a Jack of all trades, spoofer, or someone who doesn't fit in. I think I'm constantly falling between stools.

I have three months left on my contract, and I just don't know what a practical next step should be. I'm posting this now before I find myself in an even more distressing position for myself and my wife. The last time, I only coped by going on anti-depressants (also, I'm prone to anxiety and depression). I have thought of seeing a professional careers coach who, preferably, would also be a psychologist. This isn't the first time this anxiety and worry has hit me.

I don't know if anyone would have any advice on this. I hope so.

Degringola

If I were you OP I would definitely see a careers coach as soon as possible.
He/she will hopefully be able to untangle your thoughts/fears/anxieties about your future career path, clear your thinking and hone in on what your best at.
It's sounds like you're a very intelligent person who finds it hard to make choices because you are talented in several areas. A careers coach may be able to pull all that together, or indeed help you to focus on one or two areas and show you light at the end of the tunnel. Please don't put yourself down as a jack-of-all-trades.
Best of luck.