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Finding it hard to forget about someone

  • 16-02-2013 1:24pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭


    Is there any easy way? Or any way? I mean to forget about someone.

    Some time back, I met someone. Nothing major there between us but I liked him. I didn't believe anything was going to develop between us due to whatever little that was there. To put a very long story short. He fcuked me over royally with an empty promise, which got me to think about him more and more. Me thinking, how sweet and nice of him. But he didn't fulfill his little promise and had many excuses which were drip fed to me when I went looking for an explaination as to what he was about. Each excuse allowed the disappointment all to linger on, with no closure, ever. It caused a false hope, that maybe he was genuine and doubt and confusion - was he real or not. Nothing was rectified on his part and he ran with so much apathy in his bones leaving me with excuses and trying to make sense of it all.

    My head was destroyed and I was an emotional mess trying to figure out why someone would lie like that. I asked him but he didn't tell me, and swore blind he never lied to me. One of my many conclusions is that he was trying to dismiss me, indirectly, through his lack of action at fulfilling his promise. I don't know. 

    He's as crediblible as Lance Armstrong and I know I got a lucky escape from him but it doesn't stop from thinking about him and when I do think of him it just brings me down, down, down. They say time is a great healer and it certainly is and it's fading buy I'm still thinking about him at times. Not that I want to. I just want him to fcuk off away from my mind.   


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    A lobotomy worked for me!




    What was the question again?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,754 ✭✭✭Itwasntme.


    For your own sake OP, please take this to personal issues. Unless of course you're hoping the jokers in AH will cheer you up.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    OP , you've been round these parts 'bout three years , have 3000+ posts.... I hope you're drunk posting here this morning.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    A lot of words in OP's post, even used paragraphs but within those paragraphs is absolutely no information. I don't know how you managed it OP but well done.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,713 ✭✭✭HondaSami


    I get a strong sense of deja vu here.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,659 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    I get a strong sense of deja vu here.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 53,835 ✭✭✭✭tayto lover


    You were too good and caring for him OP.
    You will find someone far nicer in time.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,041 ✭✭✭Seachmall


    I'm sorry I left you feeling like that, OP.

    Truly, I am.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 699 ✭✭✭lounakin


    You will forget with time. Just think ahead, one day you will be over this. You'll twirl this in your mind and torture yourself for a while and then one day you'll poo all that out and it'll be over.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,330 ✭✭✭Gran Hermano


    Pop up to your GP and get a script for alzheimer's.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,764 ✭✭✭cml387


    It's Eamonn Gilmore talking about Enda.
    Well Eamonn, you've made your bed, that's all I can say.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,346 ✭✭✭van_beano


    I get a strong sense of deja vu here.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,232 ✭✭✭ITS_A_BADGER


    watch the voice of ireland and fap furiously over brezzie like the rest of the women do, person forgot!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    Some people are just more sensitive to the ways of dickheads. You just need to work on that.

    Finding it hard to forget about him? From what you say, why would you be giving him the time of day? Think of yourself as better off


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,065 ✭✭✭crazygeryy


    alcohol is the answer it always is.


  • Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,946 Mod ✭✭✭✭dr.bollocko


    Hello OP.

    I know you know where the PI forum is. So I'll go ahead and assume you meant to post this in AH. Please PM me if you want it moved.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 618 ✭✭✭pandaboy


    COOK METH!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,943 ✭✭✭smcgiff


    *After decades of research the answer is simple, all you need to do is... LOOK SQUIRREL!!!
















    *men are dogs


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Only one thing to do. Sleep around!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,127 ✭✭✭kjl


    Yeah, I heard heroin takes the edge off. Kinda makes you forget about all your worries.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 618 ✭✭✭pandaboy


    smash wrote: »
    Only one thing to do. Sleep around!

    she does love sleep!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    Thanks guys. Smash and Pandaboy, you're so funny. I very much love sleep, and sleeping it off is grand but I can't spend every minute of my days asleep and when awake, many times, the sh1t hits me with a bang.
    crazygeryy wrote: »
    alcohol is the answer it always is.

    I don't think alcohol is the answer. I want it to be but it's not. It might help for a while, bouncing around in a happy, drunken frenzy but it's not worth it when the hangover kicks in. And then I can't spend every day madly drunk.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    options include

    1) filling your brain with something else so its far too busy to dwell on him

    2) get him out of your head by counselling, (formal or informal) :)

    good luck OP


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    What was the little promise?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    Seachmall wrote: »
    I'm sorry I left you feeling like that, OP.

    Truly, I am.

    You little fcuked up pr1ck


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    alternatively, take your aggression out on a third party, that always works :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,080 ✭✭✭✭Big Nasty


    OP, shag another dude, be grand. ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,219 ✭✭✭woodoo


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    Each excuse allowed the disappointment all to linger on, with no closure, ever.   

    That is a very irish way of dealing with people, well more specifically a very irish male way, and even more specifically that that it is the modus operandi of irish tradesmen/builder. It is cowardly and maddening.

    I don't know what this guy was promising you but the promising, not delivering and failing to have the balls or the decency to just say he can't do it doesn't surprise me at all.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,192 ✭✭✭Sound of Silence


    600full-eternal-sunshine-of-the-spotless-mind-screenshot.jpg

    Maybe you need some inspiration, OP.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,166 ✭✭✭Fr_Dougal


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    Is there any easy way? Or any way? I mean to forget about someone.

    Some time back, I met someone. Nothing major there between us but I liked him. I didn't believe anything was going to develop between us due to whatever little that was there. To put a very long story short. He fcuked me over royally with an empty promise, which got me to think about him more and more. Me thinking, how sweet and nice of him. But he didn't fulfill his little promise and had many excuses which were drip fed to me when I went looking for an explaination as to what he was about. Each excuse allowed the disappointment all to linger on, with no closure, ever. It caused a false hope, that maybe he was genuine and doubt and confusion - was he real or not. Nothing was rectified on his part and he ran with so much apathy in his bones leaving me with excuses and trying to make sense of it all.

    My head was destroyed and I was an emotional mess trying to figure out why someone would lie like that. I asked him but he didn't tell me, and swore blind he never lied to me. One of my many conclusions is that he was trying to dismiss me, indirectly, through his lack of action at fulfilling his promise. I don't know. 

    He's as crediblible as Lance Armstrong and I know I got a lucky escape from him but it doesn't stop from thinking about him and when I do think of him it just brings me down, down, down. They say time is a great healer and it certainly is and it's fading buy I'm still thinking about him at times. Not that I want to. I just want him to fcuk off away from my mind.   

    So you're upset about Decan Kidneys lack of progress with the Irish squad?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    BBDBB wrote: »
    options include

    1) filling your brain with something else so its far too busy to dwell on him

    2) get him out of your head by counselling, (formal or informal) :)

    good luck OP

    A - is working but very s-l-o-w-l-y.

    May need to go down the route of B and was thinking about it but money is so tight. My weekly wage is about 200 quid a week. A counselling session (and I'd need a few) is 90 euro. So it doesn't leave much money left over afterwards. Or another way, after paying bills and groceries, I wouldn't have 90 quid.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    You little fcuked up pr1ck
    Try not to overthink things. For example, the comment you threw that abuse at was just a joke, and to be expected in AH.
    You will get over this but you have to make yourself too. How long is it going on? It's really not something worth being tortured by for long.

    I know of counsellors who charge half that. Shop around OP.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 41 BigBraveBear


    woodoo wrote: »
    That is a very irish way of dealing with people, well more specifically a very irish male way, and even more specifically that that it is the modus operandi of irish tradesmen/builder. It is cowardly and maddening.

    I don't know what this guy was promising you but the promising, not delivering and failing to have the balls or the decency to just say he can't do it doesn't surprise me at all.


    This is a very Irish way of dealing with things? I've heard it all now, may god have mercy on us all!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    A - is working but very s-l-o-w-l-y.

    May need to go down the route of B and was thinking about it but money is so tight. My weekly wage is about 200 quid a week. A counselling session (and I'd need a few) is 90 euro. So it doesn't leave much money left over afterwards. Or another way, after paying bills and groceries, I wouldn't have 90 quid.



    informal counselling doesnt cost a bean

    counsellors dont tend to give you answers, they just ask you more questions

    with that in mind you can find other ways to get your thoughts out of your head, try writing it out, letters you never send, some people find solace in a hobby or craft


    also the personal issues forum is that way
    > usually there are plenty of people willing to read your thoughts and offer a view, its not counselling per se but it challenges teh way you think, gets your thoughts ordered and structured as you reply and can be a cathartic release


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,073 ✭✭✭Pottler


    This is about crap Couriers, right?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    woodoo wrote: »
    That is a very irish way of dealing with people, well more specifically a very irish male way, and even more specifically that that it is the modus operandi of irish tradesmen/builder. It is cowardly and maddening.

    I don't know what this guy was promising you but the promising, not delivering and failing to have the balls or the decency to just say he can't do it doesn't surprise me at all.

    I hate this! When you have a builder or another tradesman booked and they were enthuastic about the job, and you wait for them to arrive on whatever day you have agreed, and they don't show and not even so much as a phonecall or a message from him. You might then arrange for another day because his excuse was plausible, just for the same thing to happen again.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,619 ✭✭✭ilovesleep


    Madam_X wrote: »
    Try not to overthink things. For example, the comment you threw that abuse at was just a joke, and to be expected in AH.
    You will get over this but you have to make yourself too. How long is it going on? It's really not something worth being tortured by for long.

    I know of counsellors who charge half that. Shop around OP.

    I know it was a joke and I found it very funny (cheers man) and my comment was also a joke.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 453 ✭✭CollardGreens


    My head was destroyed and I was an emotional mess trying to figure out why someone would lie like that. I asked him but he didn't tell me, and swore blind he never lied to me. One of my many conclusions is that he was trying to dismiss me, indirectly, through his lack of action at fulfilling his promise. I don't know.

    It was a man, men do that. One word......

    NEXT..... :cool:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    I hate this! When you have a builder or another tradesman booked and they were enthuastic about the job, and you wait for them to arrive on whatever day you have agreed, and they don't show and not even so much as a phonecall or a message from him. You might then arrange for another day because his excuse was plausible, just for the same thing to happen again.

    Tradesman *sniggers*


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 289 ✭✭ashers22


    refreshing change of pace for AH, there's some decent advice there op. It will get better in time, do find other things to do to keep your mind occupied. Remember you are the sum of your experiences so embrace it and take it with you, tomorrow is a new day, new adventures await :)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,397 ✭✭✭✭Birneybau


    I get a strong sense of deja vu here.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    you know what you should do if you get a sense of deja vu?



    same as you did last time :p


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 352 ✭✭Best username ever


    He sounds like an absolute wanker OP. my wife had an awful experience in work recently. I took our kids out and we bought her flowers and chocolates. She slept in until 2 because she was so exhausted. We then surprised her with the chocolates and flowers.

    Well impressed she was, there are better men out there.

    This is just a blip. Cheer up you'll get through it. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,880 ✭✭✭Canis Lupus


    I reckon it's you and not him OP.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,166 ✭✭✭Fr_Dougal


    It was a man, men do that. One word......

    NEXT..... :cool:

    :rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,576 ✭✭✭Paddy Cow


    ilovesleep wrote: »
    Is there any easy way? Or any way? I mean to forget about someone.

    Some time back, I met someone. Nothing major there between us but I liked him. I didn't believe anything was going to develop between us due to whatever little that was there. To put a very long story short. He fcuked me over royally with an empty promise, which got me to think about him more and more. Me thinking, how sweet and nice of him. But he didn't fulfill his little promise and had many excuses which were drip fed to me when I went looking for an explaination as to what he was about. Each excuse allowed the disappointment all to linger on, with no closure, ever. It caused a false hope, that maybe he was genuine and doubt and confusion - was he real or not. Nothing was rectified on his part and he ran with so much apathy in his bones leaving me with excuses and trying to make sense of it all.

    My head was destroyed and I was an emotional mess trying to figure out why someone would lie like that. I asked him but he didn't tell me, and swore blind he never lied to me. One of my many conclusions is that he was trying to dismiss me, indirectly, through his lack of action at fulfilling his promise. I don't know.

    He's as crediblible as Lance Armstrong and I know I got a lucky escape from him but it doesn't stop from thinking about him and when I do think of him it just brings me down, down, down. They say time is a great healer and it certainly is and it's fading buy I'm still thinking about him at times. Not that I want to. I just want him to fcuk off away from my mind.
    I have read this three times and I can't make sense of it. You say from the beginning that it was nothing major and you didn't expect it to develop but then sound like someone who expected it to develop and was disappointed when it didn't?!? Without knowing what the "little promise" was, it sounds like a classic case of him telling you what you wanted to hear so he could get his leg over. Sorry if that sounds crude but you got played.

    The best thing you can do is move on. If he cared that little for you in your relationship, he cares even less now that you are no longer together and while he has messed enough with your head that you are still trying to work out what went wrong while you were together, he hasn't given the situation a moments thought since you broke up. If you are looking for something meaningful, you won't find it with him.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    I think this all boils down to the pimple on your bottom


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