Verbal abuse of elderly relative

Courtesy Flush

Not sure of this is the right place to ask this question?

An elderly uncle of mine has been verbally abused by his son in law a number of times now in his own home. The son in law does not live there but will visit frequently with his wife (daughter of this gentleman) Aruguments seem to happen quite often. Seemingly the daughter and her father dont get on but the son on law is quite an intimidating person and gets very abusive and my elderly uncle is in his eighties and its starting to affect his health visibly.

I am loathe to get involved in their family disputes but I do see this is a bullying situation and would hate to see this continue unchecked
Unfortunatlely there are no other family members to approach about this. I only know about this as I recently asked my uncle about his obvious anxiety and he told me what was happening. I cannot say for sure if the abuse is threatening or just profane
Should I advise him to go to the Gardai, or what could they even do in this type of situation ?

Thanks for any advice

Kristopherus

Is it any harm to ask what general area your uncle lives in? Nothing specific, just the province.

Courtesy Flush

Kristopherus wrote: »

Is it any harm to ask what general area your uncle lives in? Nothing specific, just the province.

Yes he lives in Leinster , Dublin area

Procrastastudy

Well technically the gardai can work on the basis of a threat under certain circumstances or if the 'abuse' is causing mental pain...

I do wonder though if it would just be a better approach next time this gentlemen comes over just to not open the front door though.

MagicSean

Can't the HSE apply for a safety order on behalf of a vulnerable person?

EDIT: May not apply here.

http://www.irishstatutebook.ie/1996/en/act/pub/0001/sec0006.html#sec6

Courtesy Flush

Its seems to be such a grey area with mental abuse and bullying, so hard to even prove. Is someone is assaulted they can show cuts or bruises to prove it but how does one show mental scars ?

lovelyjubbly

Dependant on the area of Dublin he resides in there may be a social worker for older people/elder abuse available. Generally they offer mediation and support.

http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/Older_People_Services/Elder_Abuse_Section/Protecting_Older_People_from_Abuse.html

Actually it appears that it is a nationwide service;
http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/Older_People_Services/Elder_Abuse_Section/Protecting_Older_People_from_Abuse.html#contact

Courtesy Flush

lovelyjubbly wrote: »

Dependant on the area of Dublin he resides in there may be a social worker for older people/elder abuse available. Generally they offer mediation and support.

http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/Older_People_Services/Elder_Abuse_Section/Protecting_Older_People_from_Abuse.html

Actually it appears that it is a nationwide service;
http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/Older_People_Services/Elder_Abuse_Section/Protecting_Older_People_from_Abuse.html#contact

Thanks that information looks quite helpful

johnnyskeleton

Have you tried saying it to your cousin or her husband?

Courtesy Flush

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

Have you tried saying it to your cousin or her husband?

No I plan to give all the available information to my uncle to facilitate him, but it would ultimately be his decision to what he wants to do with this.
I am still trying to decide if I should say anything to my cousin about this. I see them very rarely

Kristopherus

Courtesy Flush wrote: »

Yes he lives in Leinster , Dublin area

Apologies, Courtesy Flush, I lost track of the thread. The HSE now have dedicated Social Workers, who deal solely with Elder Abuse. Contact your local Health Centre and they should be able to point you towards the appropriate SW.You should make an appointment with this SW and explain the situation to her/him. They will have heard dozens of stories similar to yours, and they will advise the best course of action. Best of luck with it all.