Need Advice Please

Ineedadvice1

Hi, ok, where do I start. I came on here a few years ago when this incident occurred. But at the time I was so confussed and I really didnt understand what had happened myself. First i'll tell you what happened. I was at a party in a "friends" house, we were all drinking until the early hours of the morning, and at about 8 o clock in the morning I decided to go to bed. My boyfriend was there at the time. When I went up to bed I fell asleep straight away. I was wrecked as you can imagine. And I really dont remember much but I remember waking up briefly with someone on top of me and him ripping my bra off in the middle. Then all I remember is getting up absolutely shocked and trying to gather my thoughts at the end of the room, in the meantime this guy left the room. I got dressed and went downstairs. At which point I gathered my two friends upstairs, told them what happened and left the house in hysterics. It was two days of me in my bed, not eating, sleeping very little and crying constantly. I still couldnt comprehend what had just happened and couldnt imagine what I was going to tell my boyfriend.

After the second day I tried to call my boyfriend but there was no answer. So I just got into my car and went straight down. At the time I kind of thought that maybe I was involved in this fiasco, and maybe that I WAS capable of doing such a horrible thing. But the more and more I thought about it the more and more I started to think that I couldnt have done this. And the more and more I started to think about it iin this context then the more and more the R word come into my head.

I really just want to know if anyone else has ever had an experience like this and if anyone can tell me how they felt after. Keep in mind this happened four years ago. But to this day it has changed me. I am currently doing councelling, which is long needed. But I am really feeling down as this guy is back in the place I live. (he was living away)

If anyone could reply it would be greatly appreciated! Thanks

Wibbs

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