not sure what to do.

ikickedaboy

Ok I will try to give a brief description of events, my partner took to going out and not coming home till the next day, this happened a few years ago, I very nearly had a nervous breakdown and did something I had never done before and never will again, after that there was a year and a bit of peace, until recently when she started up again this time we seperated mainly because I could not let what happened ever happen again. So its been a few months and we talking and being quite civil, now she goes out quite a lot or basically when she has money, (she ran up quite a debt in my name the last time) there have been incidents in the past where she has not paid debts (even though I had given her the cash to do so) ans has even convinced other people that she had paid them when she hadn't.
So here is my delima there are kids involved which is the main concern, I pay all the old debts and a substantial amount of maintenance, I dropped one of my kids off with her only to find her completely inibriated from the night before, the money I give her is only making her problem worse, what if anything should I do.

Taltos

My suggestion is to immediately get legal advice.
1. to protect yourself from any debts she incurs.
2. to seek full custody of the children - they cannot be with her, and if you don't take action how long before someone reports her to social and you both lose them?

Zulu

sffc wrote: »

"I very nearly had a nervous breakdown and did something I had never done before and never will again, after that there was a year and a bit of peace, "

+1 on Taltos's advice . The above part of your post concerns me greatly OP . If you mean you were violent to her and it is recorded ( by the Gardai for example ) you have made things much worse for all involved . Apart of course from doing something legally and morally wrong . Is that what you meant OP ?

Well you could jump to the conclusion that he was violent, or you could give the guy the benefit of doubt and assume he meant that he took her back after an affair.

Taltos

Guys, per our charter less discussion around facts not in place. The OP is under no obligation to reveal more than they require. This forum's intent is to provide advice and support to posters around Separation and Divorce.

Thanks
Taltos

ikickedaboy

Yeah I'm not very good at writing these things down and you could jump to that conclusion.
Taltos
I have protected myself from any debts from xmas on, it will still take a couple of years to pay off the rest but thats not the improtant part for me. I have an apointment booked with a solicitor next week.

Is there any point in me contacting the social and explaining my concerns to them now, I'm not there so I don't know if she is in or out or whats happening between visits. She is very good at covering her tracks and has lied about everything to everyone, she will of course get got out eventually, but in the interim what should I do ?