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Irish Flirting Advice

  • 28-01-2013 10:00pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi

    I suppose I should start of by saying that I am a moderately shy 21 year old professional, had suffered tremendously in the past and am coming to terms with things now and my confidence is growing consistently month on month.

    However I have been left without quite a bit of life experience :I

    Basically over the weekend I was in the local pub chatting with a girl for about 4 hours, everything was going well and she was giving me good signs, I can be a charmer when I like someone. Anyway we ended up in a large group and I didn't manage to get her number (nor in truth had I the confidence to ask).

    What I'm wondering is whether exactly it would have been suitable to ask for a number? What would she think of a guy who just let her leave? I 'might' see her around again.

    It is very embarrassing to be asking this :S


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 409 ✭✭skyfall2012


    Yes, I think she would have given her number to you gladly and she would enjoy being asked out on a date, to get to know each other better. Talking for 4 hours is a pretty good sign that she is interested. Take your opportunity the next time. Good luck OP.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭RossFixxxed


    I don't think there's any rule, but after 4 hours chatting and charming sure sounds like an ideal time to ask for a number!

    It's impossible to tell what she might think, but if you see her again just ask for it. There is nothing at all to be embarrassed about, these things take some doing and can make anyone nervous! To be honest you've done pretty much the hardest parts of all this, it's just a little extra plunge to ask for the number. You're making fllying progress and I'm looking forward to seeing your first post about your gorgeous new girlfriend! :)

    You're kicking ass, keep at it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,089 ✭✭✭✭P. Breathnach


    ...
    It's impossible to tell what she might think, but if you see her again just ask for it...
    There is a small chance that she might wonder why you didn't ask for it earlier. My inner scriptwriter suggests that you say "I was enjoying our conversation so much that I was distracted from asking you ...".

    One way to make contact for such a purpose is facebook (although, if you read this forum regularly, you might see that facebook is often associated with difficulties in relationships, so use it with caution).


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭RossFixxxed


    There is a small chance that she might wonder why you didn't ask for it earlier. My inner scriptwriter suggests that you say "I was enjoying our conversation so much that I was distracted from asking you ...".

    One way to make contact for such a purpose is facebook (although, if you read this forum regularly, you might see that facebook is often associated with difficulties in relationships, so use it with caution).

    Yeah I actually wrote similar, something around saying he got shy and was kicking himself for not asking her out there and then. It shows he's confident, but also shy and nervous around her. Not necessarily the route to take, it depends on the situation but definitely can qualify it with saying how much he enjoyed talking to her and was really hoping they'd meet again... phone number!

    Facebook can be handy for making a little contact quickly but is best moved on from soon after and calling / meeting. Your caveat is welll put!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 987 ✭✭✭Kosseegan


    The way to get a phone number is to keep a few jokes in your phone. When you reach the point where she laughs at something tell her you have a funny text about the topic which just came from a friend of yours in Australia yesterday. She will give you her number to get the text.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks for all the insight folks :)

    Unfortunately I didn't really catch her surname, so facebook is a no go really, anyway I prefer doing things in person.

    I'm not sure about the joke thing, it seems a bit timid and cheesy for my liking, it's not that I was particularly nervous I will quite happily ask with a cheeky smile- I just didnt know if it was suitable or acceptable to ask at that point.

    I suppose when I say I'm shy I am more so referring to my past, I dont really get nervous or embarrassed about things anymore. I had an extremely sheltered life so if you could imagine having growing up in a cult and escaping- that to a slightly lesser extent is my current situation.

    Hopefully we'll meet again but whatever happens it is a healthy boost to my confidence that someone nice could like me, due to past situations I had lost all faith and interest in myself for a very long time.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,127 ✭✭✭kjl


    fddddsfdf wrote: »
    Hi

    I suppose I should start of by saying that I am a moderately shy 21 year old professional, had suffered tremendously in the past and am coming to terms with things now and my confidence is growing consistently month on month.

    However I have been left without quite a bit of life experience :I

    Basically over the weekend I was in the local pub chatting with a girl for about 4 hours, everything was going well and she was giving me good signs, I can be a charmer when I like someone. Anyway we ended up in a large group and I didn't manage to get her number (nor in truth had I the confidence to ask).

    What I'm wondering is whether exactly it would have been suitable to ask for a number? What would she think of a guy who just let her leave? I 'might' see her around again.

    It is very embarrassing to be asking this :S

    I think this is pretty much what Facebook was invented for. Find her profile and send her a message.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    theres no rule re time, so just ask when you feel that you'd like it, at the end of a conversation is good.

    eg I enjoyed talking to you, we should do this again it was fun
    wait for positive acknowledgement
    can I have your number?

    the above method re the jokes/texts is clever


    next time you bump into her in town or around, bring it up,

    eg Im such a dope, I meant to ask for your number the other night cos I enjoyed talking to you


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭RossFixxxed


    Whatever particular approach you take OP your attitude is absolutely brillaint and that's the most important thing. Fair play, I could learn from you on that one! :)


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