How to go through a break up

LegacyUser

My girlfriend and i have been going out almost a year and its been about a year and 4 months since we started shanagains for the first time

she is a really nice girl but it was my first relationship and while it was good fun i think im kinda ready to move on.

I think we did really well. We went through all the stages: Funk Buddies, meeting up, going out, met d friends and family, been through the separated summer, the birthdays and Christmas but now i feel as its reached a lull and I'm beginning to lose interest in the Relationship style of life

its not the only reason!.. its my last year in college and my grades are far from what i aimed for, iv had too many sleepless night, missed lectures, lack of study and assignments and unproductive time spent.
Plus this year things have changed slightly.. she lives on her own and relies really heavily on me for social contact where as I'm the opposite with loads of friends. she is become what you would call clingy and doesn't seem to pushed on branching out

so i wouldn't mind being single for the remaining 5 months in college, but i have no idea how to break up and i know its really going to upset her but i cant let that stand in the way because thats what relationships are really about

can anyone offer advice?

xLexie

Don't drag it out. Explain to her that you want to end the relationship and focus on other aspects of your life. I wouldn't recommend using the words "taking a break" or "we can still be friends". In my experience being friends with an ex comes much later, after the breakup. Good luck

Katgurl

Yeah you need to sit down and be kind but very very clear. If she's not getting it say things like "I'm sorry but it's over... I'm ending it... I don't feel the same anymore... I still care about you but I want to be on my own... I don't want to hurt you but I don't want to pretend to be in this relationship..."
Etc etc

She will be upset but she will get over it OP.

LegacyUser

thanks for the replies and il do my best to leave her down as easily as possible,

she will be upset but do you think its bad form to try and break up before valentines day?

also i don't want to drop it on her like a ton of brick so should i act a bit distant for awhile, or should i sent her a tx before hand saying "We need to talk"

its a situation id do anything to avoid at the min because iv no experience to breaking up

Sauve

HowToBreakUp wrote: »

thanks for the replies and il do my best to leave her down as easily as possible,

she will be upset but do you think its bad form to try and break up before valentines day?

also i don't want to drop it on her like a ton of brick so should i act a bit distant for awhile, or should i sent her a tx before hand saying "We need to talk"

its a situation id do anything to avoid at the min because iv no experience to breaking up

Nah it's not bad form to do it before Valentines' Day OP - if anything it's unfair on her to drag out the inevitable. Do it quickly, for her sake as well as yours and move on. The relationship is over, you want out, end of story

Figure out what you need to say, go see her, and do it. Don't overthink it too much or you'll drive yourself crazy.

Good luck, you'll be grand

dia squish

Don't go distant first - that'll just drag it out for her. If you're gonna do it, get yourself ready and just do it.

RossFixxxed

The decent way is to do it sooner than later. Face to face and be respectful but direct. Just tell her it is over. Don't go dragging this out or make games out of it. Forget valentines day that's irrelevant.

Good luck OP, not the most fun, but do it correctly and you'll be glad you did.

Lorna123

You have to think of yourself first here OP and this doesn't mean that you are not taking your g/f's feeligs into consideration either. You have to do what's best for you and that is that you want to be single. You don't have to make a string of excuses, it is best to just say "I have thought about this a lot and the conclusion I have come to is that I want to be single again". If she asks you why just say that this is how you feel and that you cannot explain it any further. You can always say that you think she is a very nice girl but that a relationship is not what you want right now. Don't promise her anything in the future just say that you have no idea what the future holds. You can say that she did nothing wrong but you just feel that you would like to be single again and that is the bottom line. Best of Luck.