My Relationship

6541

Hi Ladies,

Hopefully this is in the right forum. Am looking for the opinion of the fairer of the species. So my stories goes as follows, five years ago I moved to Australia and met an Irish Girl, at the time she was in a relationship with someone, she ended up leaving him for me.

The following five years loads of life events happened, my folks died so I moved home to take care of things, we decided to split lives between Oz and Ireland. Both of us have professional careers. Sometimes we could be apart for three to four months.

Anyway we decided that we would make a go of it in Ireland and settle down. Kids etc, so all planned, I wired the money, as I am a lot wealthier then her and next thing bang, she ups sticks moves to another country with another bloke, taking my cash !!!

At the same time she turns around and tells me that she also has had an STI that makes it difficult having kids, rattles on about loving me but that I was not committed enough and starts pointing out my failings. By the way I have tested negative for this STI, thank god.

I think I have been played by one of the best!

So what do you think of that story?

rainbow kirby

Moved from tLL to RI.

judgefudge

Well it's appalling. I'm really sorry that that happened for you! Have you consulted any legal advice to see where you stand on the cash front? Any other advice you're lookin for?

Strawberry Fields

Could have been cold feet, some people aren't able to settle down.
Maybe having lived in Oz the prospects of Ireland didn't appeal.
Better off rid if that's what she's like. Clearly dodged a bullet with the sti if that's true.

6541

Ya I think it is appalling as well, tell ya have had to do alot of soul searching after that one. Am used to pretty heavy life events have had my fair share of them. But this girl is amazing at the way she would try and pin all this back on me! A skill in itself.

I have been extremely nice so far and only requested my cashback recently. However my mood has turned darker on this at the moment, I have now threatened to register a personnel debt against her. Basically if she ever comes to Ireland, which she will have to, her credit rating will be shot.
Suppose I am just on here moaning as I have not told many people as I will appear like an absolute idiot !

judgefudge

6541 wrote: »

Suppose I am just on here moaning as I have not told many people as I will appear like an absolute idiot !

Well don't feel like an idiot. Everyone is capable of getting scammed by a manipulative person, which is what she obviously is. You're not an idiot for falling for someone, this is all on her.

Overheal

don't threaten to place the debt, actually do it.

As for the personal bit, this is going to hurt on a deep level, and in my own experience it was a lot tamer than what you have described. Just don't let it shut you off, these kind of people are the exception, not the rule, and there are certifiably better people out there than them, thank god I ran into one eventually to slap that in my face.

Big Bag of Chips

saiint - red card for uncivil posting.

If you can't post according to The Charter, please refrain from posting altogether.

Big Bag of Chips

daisybelle2008

OP you say she said you weren't committed enough and started pointing out all your failings in the relationship. You were together for 5 years, is that the first you heard of her issues with the relationship. Did ye really know each other well?

It seems so strange that someone you spent 5 years with could scam you out of money like that. Has she acknowledged that the money is not hers to keep, what is her position on it.

Were there warning signs that all was not well in the relationship? Don't be afraid to talk to people about it, I mean friends and family will know you as a couple, you can be honest about what happened and what your feeling no-one is going to call you an idiot, if the relationship was fine up to the end and she changed all of a sudden overnight into a manipulative scammer, how were you supposed to foresee that coming right, no one would.