Does he like me?

scarymoon1

I work with a guy and have talked to him a small bit. I think he liked me as anytime I passed him etc he would be looking at me. So a few weeks ago I sent him a FB request. He accepted and we chatted a bit on it. He said sweet dreams to me once on it - but Im still not sure if he likes me. We were out at our xmas party and I didnt get to talk to him much so I sent him a message saying sorry I wasnt talking to you much but I would have liked to. I thought this would have given him the idea I fancied him! I sent him a message last night just asking hello or whatever - he was on facebook since but the message went unread. I just deleted all messages so I wouldnt be seeing whether he read it or not. I have a feeling he doesnt like me as he hasnt asked me out????

dozy doctor

Well if you like him why dont you ask him out and forget about facebook... Facebook is a waste of time, su you need to stop beating about the bush and ask him out...
Whats the worst he can say? No....
You have nothing to lose and everything to gain...

scarymoon1

dozy doctor wrote: »

Well if you like him why dont you ask him out and forget about facebook... Facebook is a waste of time, su you need to stop beating about the bush and ask him out...
Whats the worst he can say? No....
You have nothing to lose and everything to gain...

Ask him out?? I might have done before but Ive been told numerous times to let the guy do all the chasing - they dont like the girl being forward. I would have thought this was bull before but now I think its true.

Mansized Wreath

As a guy here I'd advise you not to contact him again and see what happens. You've already sent him a couple of messages, if he's interested he'll contact YOU. Play hard to get,ball in his court and if he likes you he'll make the effort. If not,brush it off and move onto someone else ;-)

dozy doctor

scarymoon1 wrote: »

Ask him out?? I might have done before but Ive been told numerous times to let the guy do all the chasing - they dont like the girl being forward. I would have thought this was bull before but now I think its true.

Have to disagree with you...
some guys are shy as well and dont like asking girls out, for fear of rejection.

I was liked that myself and I know my 20 year old son wont ask a girl out either...
He is far to shy, but I suppose you gotta do what you feel comfortable doing and if you feel more comfortable letting him ask you out, then so be it...

And like the other poster mentioned, if nothing happens move on, but what are you going to do then, wait got someone else you fancy to ask you out?

You could be a long time waiting....

scarymoon1

dozy doctor wrote: »

Have to disagree with you...
some guys are shy as well and dont like asking girls out, for fear of rejection.

I was liked that myself and I know my 20 year old son wont ask a girl out either...
He is far to shy, but I suppose you gotta do what you feel comfortable doing and if you feel more comfortable letting him ask you out, then so be it...

And like the other poster mentioned, if nothing happens move on, but what are you going to do then, wait got someone else you fancy to ask you out?

You could be a long time waiting....

I agree with what your saying - I think he is shy actually and so will probably not ask me out. But I've learned with 99% of men if you ask them out/chase after them they run the other way. So yes I'l just have to wait - and wait but thats what guys want - for them to do the running and be in charge and for us girls to wait. I dont agree with it but that life im afraid. As the other poster already said - dont contact him again - point proved Im afraid

CaraMay

Op, tbh even if a guy is shy, if he is interested enough he will ask the girl out. Don't put your life on hold for him.

scarymoon1

CaraMay wrote: »

Op, tbh even if a guy is shy, if he is interested enough he will ask the girl out. Don't put your life on hold for him.

Yep I suppose your right. No idea why he was always looking at me so - maybe he's just weird!!! I feel like deleting him from FB now

dearg lady

Impossible for us to tell if he's interested or not. as you have messaged him a couple of times with no response, i would not ask him out. You may hear back from him, you may not, try not to focus too much on it, keep yourself busy with other things.

scarymoon1

dearg lady wrote: »

Impossible for us to tell if he's interested or not. as you have messaged him a couple of times with no response, i would not ask him out. You may hear back from him, you may not, try not to focus too much on it, keep yourself busy with other things.

Think i might not have made my op clear - apologies. I only sent one message that got no reply - that was last night.

dearg lady

scarymoon1 wrote: »

Think i might not have made my op clear - apologies. I only sent one message that got no reply - that was last night.

ah, sorry, misunderstood! I still would probably wait a bit and see. Or my next contact would also be a bit general. I don't expect guys to do all the work, but if he's not responding it's probably not a good sign..

scarymoon1

dearg lady wrote: »

ah, sorry, misunderstood! I still would probably wait a bit and see. Or my next contact would also be a bit general. I don't expect guys to do all the work, but if he's not responding it's probably not a good sign..

I also get the feeling he responded because he felt he HAD to as we work together. Embarrassed now

dearg lady

scarymoon1 wrote: »

I also get the feeling he responded because he felt he HAD to as we work together. Embarrassed now

Don't feel embarrassed! A few fb messages is no big deal. It;s no pressure on him, I really wouldn't worry about it. I think you might be going down the route of overthinking it, I've been there, it's not worth it!! Just be casual when you see him.

Sephiroth_dude

scarymoon1 wrote: »

Ask him out?? I might have done before but Ive been told numerous times to let the guy do all the chasing - they dont like the girl being forward. I would have thought this was bull before but now I think its true.

Trust me it is bull,just grab the bull by the horns and ask the guy out if you really like him

scarymoon1

ok so we got chatting last night and it turns out he does like me BUT he has gone on 3 dates with a girl and he doesnt 'double date'. So we have to wait to the new year to do anything. But we were chatting for ages and he had no idea I liked him - he wished I had told him sooner I liked him before he had gone on the date with the other girl.

So Im so glad I told him - he was too

dozy doctor

scarymoon1 wrote: »

ok so we got chatting last night and it turns out he does like me BUT he has gone on 3 dates with a girl and he doesnt 'double date'. So we have to wait to the new year to do anything. But we were chatting for ages and he had no idea I liked him - he wished I had told him sooner I liked him before he had gone on the date with the other girl.

So Im so glad I told him - he was too

I'm glad you took our advice.... If you don't ask, you usually don't get;)

dearg lady

I don't see the issue though, is he saying he needs to finish with this girl first?

scarymoon1

dearg lady wrote: »

I don't see the issue though, is he saying he needs to finish with this girl first?

They have gone on 3 dates but they are not going out. Yes I think he needs to finish with her first before anything can happen between us. So when he said he was 'kinda seeing' someone I said thats ok - if he ever is not dating someone tell me and If im still single then we can do something. He said ok but it was killing him as he really liked me. So I guess he meant he had to let things fizzle out with her. I didnt want to tell him finish with her etc as I barely know him yet and that would be too much

dearg lady

scarymoon1 wrote: »

They have gone on 3 dates but they are not going out. Yes I think he needs to finish with her first before anything can happen between us. So when he said he was 'kinda seeing' someone I said thats ok - if he ever is not dating someone tell me and If im still single then we can do something. He said ok but it was killing him as he really liked me. So I guess he meant he had to let things fizzle out with her. I didnt want to tell him finish with her etc as I barely know him yet and that would be too much

no, you're dead right there, I think you said the right thing.
I suppose if I was in his situation I would just let this other girl know I've met someone else, I hate the idea of letting things 'fizzle out' when he knows full well he's no longer interested, seems like stringing someone along. Mind you after 3 dates, would there be much expectation on her part? Anyways, I'm rambling, fair play to ya for bringing it up, and I hope things work out for you guys

scarymoon1

im probably over thinking things here but he said he likes me and wants a kiss from me in the new year etc etc - but was saying why didn't I tell him sooner i liked him as he's gone on 3 dates. Does that mean he plans to go on another date with her or does he plan to get to know me better?? I've really no idea and don't wish to ask as it would seem demanding!!! I guess all I can do is wait and see what happens.

Meauldsegosha

scarymoon1 wrote: »

im probably over thinking things here but he said he likes me and wants a kiss from me in the new year etc etc - but was saying why didn't I tell him sooner i liked him as he's gone on 3 dates. Does that mean he plans to go on another date with her or does he plan to get to know me better?? I've really no idea and don't wish to ask as it would seem demanding!!! I guess all I can do is wait and see what happens.

Nobody can tell you what he's planning to do. If you want to know you're going to have to ask him.

scarymoon1

Meauldsegosha wrote: »

Nobody can tell you what he's planning to do. If you want to know you're going to have to ask him.

I don't want to ask as I'm not even sure if il like him as I get to know him more. Plus I'm afraid to contact him in case he thinks im a nuisance!! Il just forget about it for now - he knows I like him - he said he likes me so its up to him I suppose

CaraMay

Yep wait and see if he comes to you.

scarymoon1

if you meet a guy and he says he has the january blues, is hating work and the only thing getting him through is the thought of his holiday - it doesnt day much for you does it??? you'd think if a guy liked you things would look brighter!!

RedorDead

You still havent gone on that date i take it scarymoon?

scarymoon1

RedorDead wrote: »

You still havent gone on that date i take it scarymoon?

no - i havnt been in Dublin the last few weeks so havnt seen him yet since. But honostly Ive no idea if he will ask me out even thought he said he likes me and wanted a kiss. so fed up of guys not asking me out on dates well there is another guy that has but im not that into him