Little lie!

LegacyUser

Hi all, just need advice on a small issue!! I'm a student in college, until I met my boyfriend early on this year I'd had zilch experience with boys, barely knew any and hadn't even kissed one.

Anyway been in a really happy and honest relationship for over six months now, except for one small thing! When I first met him, and had no idea it'd actually go anywhere, he asked about previous boyfriends and, being embarrassed, I told him I'd had one. He's asked a couple of times since and I've just brushed it off as being nothing, barely lasted and it's sort of been established that this made-up guy wasn't even a real boyfriend/wasn't important. However I still feel awful about lying, but I'm terrified of coming clean. Realistically t shouldn't affect us too much because things are so great, but I'm still really worried he'll think much less of me and lose respect for me for lying, especially because we make a distinct effort to be honest... I just don't know when the right time to fess up is, if at all?! Help much appreciated!

Lorna123

Don't bother your a.. confessing to this. It is not worth it. Just think to yourself you had an imaginary boyfriend that meant nothing and leave it at that. That's my best advice. If he ever wants to delve into this just name a guy you were friends with and just say there was nothing in it. I think myself that I would not make a big deal of this small white lie that means nothing but if you confess to it it will make him wonder what other lies you told. Better to leave sleeping dogs lie.

saiint

get on with life
all it is , is a little white lie
been honest its nothing to be embarresed about ( guys actually prefer girls who havnt been with anyone before ) although someone will say something about this
its been proven in studies

its a little lie
nothing to worry about, and it will probably never come up again unless he is insecure which would kind of be abit funny since its a made up person
anyhow dont let it bother ya
just wait until the real relationship stuff starts coming in :L

judgefudge

I agree with the above post. It was an innocent white lie made up to save face. It has no real bearing on your relationship with your boyfriend. If you have played it off to be a short, unimportant thing it's really not that harmful.

I think you're worrying unnecessarily about this. Lots of people tell little white lies like this to make out they are more experienced than they are. It's perfectly normal and you need to just brush it under the carpet. Continue as you have been doing and just gloss over it whenever it is mentioned.

Holsten

Tiny little lie that you don't have to really tell him about.

BUT... if you really do feel like telling him, I don't think he would take it too badly.

kat.mac

100% agree with the above - it's such a small thing. No need to worry!

CaraMay

I think I would tell him but keep it light. It wont be a big deal.

all_smilz

well in contrast to the others I said I had been with one guy before I lost my virginity to the much older and vastly experienced guy i was dating at the time....
Afterwards I felt really vulnerable and shook up as he thought I was more experienced and I felt he was a bit rougher with me than I would have liked.
That was my 2 cents. in hind sight there is no shame in it and I felt really silly for worrying. We are all born virgins like!
If he is such a good guy then he will be fine about this!
good luck!

2rkehij30qtza5

Tell him things on a need to know basis. Does he NEED TO KNOW you told an incy weency lie? Personally I'd just keep schtum...

CheckMyBadSelf

To be honest, I'm surprised to see so many people recommend that you keep quiet.. It's obviously affecting you in some way for you to come here and ask about it.
I had a similar situation happen some years ago with my gf at the time. She told me she had been with one person when we got together (I hadn't asked her about it) and about a year later she told me that I was actually her first and that she was ashamed for lying about it. It didn't make a big difference to me or anything but I think we became just that little bit closer and more honest with each other. Then again I'm all about honesty in a relationship. Heck some guys out there would be delighted to hear that news!
As for when to tell him, keep it light as mentioned earlier, keeping the lines of communications open about sex is a great way to build intimacy. Good luck!

LegacyUser

Hi, thanks everyone for the advice... it did surprise me that people said to not tell... it was only a small thing but it did bother me. The advice to keep it light was good. I came clean anyway, was definitely a bigger deal for me than it was him and things are fine now:) And I feel better! Thanks for all the opinions...:)