Why do people do this when tragedies happen...

Aciiiiiiiiiiid

I'm seeing this all too often, when people say "Oh I usually walk by there going home from work" or "I live only 5 minutes from where that happened" etc. Who cares? Comments like these are all over the dublin bus decapitation thread last week and now the suicide of that poor young girl in donegal.

These are people who usually don't know the deceased whatsoever, are they looking for added sympathy or something. Why do people feel the need to relate themselves somehow to these tragic occurences? It kinda detracts from the grieving the real family and friends of the deceased have to go through.

the purple tin

Aciiiiiiiiiiid wrote: »

I'm seeing this all too often, when people say "Oh I usually walk by there going home from work" or "I live only 5 minutes from where that happened" etc. Who cares? Comments like these are all over the dublin bus decapitation thread last week and now the suicide of that poor young girl in donegal.

These are people who usually don't know the deceased whatsoever, are they looking for added sympathy or something. Why do people feel the need to relate themselves somehow to these tragic occurences? It kinda detracts from the grieving the real family and friends of the deceased have to go through.

I think it's because it hits close to home for them. It's one thing reading about these things in the paper or seeing them on the news but it's really a shock when it's somebody you know or it happens in your local area.

Madam_X

Just a gut reaction to how surreal it is, trying to make sense of it. I don't see anything wrong with it tbh.

King of Kings

i agree with you OP
It's like they're looking for attention by linking themselves to the tragedy.

Rasheed

I think them people just realise that it could have been them.

That tragedy is not just something you read on a paper or hear on the news, it affects real people and that person could have been them.

P_1

Madam_X wrote: »

Just a gut reaction to how surreal it is, trying to make sense of it. I don't see anything wrong with it tbh.

That's how I'd view it myself, I have to say it has felt a bit surreal walking down Nassau Street the past week given what happened there. I guess it'll wear off after a bit.

Common enough reaction if something particularly unusual happens to happen in an area where you'd normally frequent I'd say.

MadsL

Grief Vampires; overly emotionally empathetic. 80% of tabloids and women's magazines audience demographic.

Red Pepper

Aciiiiiiiiiiid wrote: »

I'm seeing this all too often, when people say "Oh I usually walk by there going home from work" or "I live only 5 minutes from where that happened" etc. Who cares? Comments like these are all over the dublin bus decapitation thread last week and now the suicide of that poor young girl in donegal.

These are people who usually don't know the deceased whatsoever, are they looking for added sympathy or something. Why do people feel the need to relate themselves somehow to these tragic occurences? It kinda detracts from the grieving the real family and friends of the deceased have to go through.

They are often ghouls, Ireland is full of them. They tend to love misery too, other people's misery.

castletownman

I'd take people acting like that towards a tragedy everyday of the week over our esteemed press invading affected family's/parties' privacy in the days following a tragedy

Pompey Magnus

Aciiiiiiiiiiid wrote: »

It kinda detracts from the grieving the real family and friends of the deceased have to go through.

I doubt that those actually grieving for the victims are in any way concerned or affected by other people identifying their tenuous links to the event.

Madam_X

MadsL wrote: »

Grief Vampires; overly emotionally empathetic. 80% of tabloids and women's magazines audience demographic.

I know only too well what you're referring to but I think, to be fair, what the OP means is way more innocuous than that. Think it's a bit much to expect people to police themselves re something so harmless and pretty understandable. Doubt it's always them looking for attention and trying to deflect sadness onto them either - hardly anyone is that ridiculous. It's just a comment - something to bring to the table.

Pilotdude5

Because it reminds you that it could have been you. Last year I did a lot of flying in Florida. The day I got down there a 21 year old Scottish girl was killed in the same type I was flying, we were at the same stage in our training and the same age. I flew over the area where she crashed nearly everyday and I just kept thinking of it.

Rasheed

Pilotdude5 wrote: »

Because it reminds you that it could have been you. Last year I did a lot of flying in Florida. The day I got down there a 21 year old Scottish girl was killed in the same type I was flying, we were at the same stage in our training and the same age. I flew over the area where she crashed nearly everyday and I just kept thinking of it.

Exactly. For example, of you hear of a car accident on the road you travel twice a day, it just brings you down to earth how easily something tragic can happen.

I don't think it's anything more then that.

delta_bravo

If you told that story of the decapitation in New York it would hardly raise an eyebrow as it happened thousands of miles away. You tell it in Dublin and people are interested. People are naturally interested in local events. I find it hard to comprehend you not comprehending this.

iamstop

I post on the same forum as the OP. I may have even posted in one of his threads before. Mad world.

Stercus Accidit

delta_bravo wrote: »

If you told that story of the decapitation in New York it would hardly raise an eyebrow as it happened thousands of miles away. You tell it in Dublin and people are interested. People are naturally interested in local events. I find it hard to comprehend you not comprehending this.

Let them have an aul' moan in peace!

There probably weren't any kids on their lawn to bark at.

mikemac1

People care more about stories they feel a connection to.

A family killed in a car crash in Kerry can affect you more then 100 miners killed in China.



And some papers take it to a whole other level
"Mary was murdered in her £200,000 home"
Daily Mail are always putting house prices in stories.
Shows what kind of person Mary was, a person like the readership. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn't but it's constantly used

Abi

the purple tin wrote: »

I think it's because it hits close to home for them. It's one thing reading about these things in the paper or seeing them on the news but it's really a shock when it's somebody you know or it happens in your local area.

This.


Off the top of my head, I can think of two women that were murdered not to far away from where I live. I only knew one of them to see around, always said hello to her but that was it. She was murdered by her husband that was having an affair. Another woman that lived not too far from where I live was murdered brutally, her husband was having an affair. A man was stabbed brutally in the town, I knew him to see and say hello to, but that was it.

When this kind of thing can happen on your doorstep, it shocks and frightens a community to think something so evil happened so close to them, and it's a scary thing.

I suspect the people that walk by the area the guy hit by the bus are in shock. Day in day out, they pass by this place and again, it just hits close to home.

peterk675

Its a valid point made OP, but people just tend to associate them selves with the tragedies as its so close to home and hard to believe.