Whats the point??

LegacyUser

Im struggling to see the point of it all. I don't have any real friends, just acquaintances. No love life to speak of. My life consists of - get up -go to work - come home and watch tv - go to bed and do the same the next day. Weekends are me just waiting for Monday so i will have something to do again. Ive tried working on friendships and making new one but i just keep making things worse. I just dont know what to do anymore........

Taltos

OP - what do you mean working on friendships and making things worse?

Are you coming across as too needy or too aloof or what is it exactly that you think you are doing to make it worse?

One thing you could try - and I know you have but keep reminding yourself - find an activity you want to do and enjoy doing. Get out at the weekend and go with the intention of having fun and if you strike up conversations with others great.

Some groups can take some time to warm to new members, so don't be pushy but be open to any invites that appear.

Just have a look in your area any try something new. Here are some examples
1. Kayaking - sea / river depending on where you live.
2. Mountain biking - many of these groups also meet up during the week. Part of the fun is meeting afterwards to hear of the spills or near injuries
3. Cycling - again many groups meet up mid week for long distance spins. Strike up conversations about the bikes / tours etc.
4. Running clubs - welcome new members, seek advice from the older members and push yourself.

These are just 4 of many examples where there is a wide range of people going out and having fun. Focus on the activity and let friendships develop naturally - slowly, over time. If you plough in and start trying to force a friendship it may not end well for you. The great advantage of all of these is you will get fitter and exercise is a great way to lift your mood, especially after a few months where you can then start to see a difference in how you carry yourself and view challenges in your life.

Right now with all the doom and gloom it is too easy to sink down into the depths of despair - but this is just the right time to shake yourself into trying something you haven't before - plunge into that activity and if a friendship happens - then wonderful. If not - you will still have some great acquaintances to have a chat with on/before/during your cycle/kayak/run..... Which in turn will give you more to talk about in work or to other people.

kflynn

If you're feeling that low there is actually a benefit.....you say you have nothing in your life that makes feel there's a point to it. So you have nothing to LOSE by taking risks.

What would you do if you had no restrictions? Set up your own business? Join a club you were afraid to before? Go up to some random girl in a pub and ask her out? Why not now?

If I was you I'd write a list of stuff you would love to do but feel you can't....just choose one and 100% go for it!

Of course you could have depression in which case it's not so easy to just get up and change things, but can't give medical advice here.

In any case it's like the economy, if there are good times there will be bad times and visa versa!

Hope you feel better soon OP!

paulap

chin up op your not alone try and see what is good in your life....like you!
all the best