Did her friend Influence her???

likeaboson

Just wanted some outside opinion on something that happened to me

I met this girl a while back and we got to talking. I found her really interesting and attractive so decided to ask her out for a drink and she said things were complicated, so not wanting to pressure her I said another time. Fast forward a few months and I asked her again and this time she said yes, we went out and had a great time.

So about 2 weeks later she invited me out with her and a few friends. When I met them it turns out it was all her female friends, not being intimidated I chatted to everyone and was having a good time and got on well with her freinds, however! there was one freind who didnt speak to me all night and kept dragging the girl who invited me away.

When one of her friends said she had to go catch the night link I offered to walk her over, when I got back the girl asked me for a quick chat and when I went outside she was there with the friend that refused to speak to me, who gave me a dirty look and left.

She had told the girl I was interested in that she wanted a girls only night and wanted to leave. So the girl wanted to know if i would mind if they left me to it and that she felt really bad for asking! As akward as it was all I could do was say 'Yeah no problem, sure I have work in the morning anyway I might just call it a night' had an akward goodbye and we left it at that

We have text since but she seems distant an uninterested

So my Question is WTF????

P. Breathnach

Let's see: she invited you out; one of her friends throws a strop when the rest seem fine with your being there; she chooses to give in to the demands of her stroppy friend rather than stand by her invitation to you.

Not good.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

P. Breathnach wrote: »

Let's see: she invited you out; one of her friends throws a strop when the rest seem fine with your being there; she chooses to give in to the demands of her stroppy friend rather than stand by her invitation to you.

Not good.

Sums it up extremely well. Let her go and consider that you had a lucky escape

Lorna123

I think that this woman is extremely rude. There is no excuse for inviting you out with a bunch of women and then leaving you high and dry. I would have no more truck with her at all. I would not reply to any messages I ever get from her and I would never contact her again. Sorry OP, that would be my advice. You deserve better than that.

sffc

In short she cares way more about what her mates think than you and will back them even in the wrong. Not good. Stop texting and talk to each other about this . You need to hear her tone on this subject and future dates. Hope it works out.

Merkin

Epic fail on her part, she behaved appallingly. I wouldn't bother asking her out again, she sounds immature and ill-mannered

movingsucks

Agree with Merkin.
The "friend" might be a big jealous attention seeker but your date's behaviour to you was lousy. Cut contact, she's not worth it.
If it's really bothering you call her and ask her straight out what the story is but to be honest do you really want to be involved with the dramaaaaaa of it all?

ManOfMystery

Incredibly rude, especially considering she invited you - it's not like you turned up unannounced. If this is how she treats you on one of your first nights out when you should be trying to impress on each other, imagine what it would be like down the line. Consider it a lucky escape OP and leave it at that

Meauldsegosha

OP I disagree with the other posters that you should forget about this girl. Her mistake was asking you out on a girls night. There could be any number of reasons why her friend acted the way she did, maybe she is going through a bad time and thought it was just going to be the girls and she could let rip about what's bothering her and with you there she didn't feel comfortable doing that.

It wasn't very nice that she asked you to leave but if the nitelinks were running it wasn't too early in the night either. Ring her and ask her on a date just the two of you. You have waited a while to date don't give up over something trivial.

Chara1001

That sound like a pretty grim night, it was very unfair to be asked out and then asked to leave on the whim of a stroppy friend.
My first impression was leave her to it, but it might be that she wanted to avoid a confrontation between you and this friend- not that i'm saying you would have been looking for a fight OP, but she might have with you- she was being incredibly rude and thought it was acceptable (dirty looks, ignoring you) and things could have reached a head if you had all stayed and were drinking. This might be something she has done before and this your date knows the warning signs.
I don't know, this is only a theory- no other reason would be acceptable to me.

I think you should ask for an explanation, maybe even in a joking way, but if this girl has now become distant and won't answer your questions , work out if you really want to be with someone who thinks its ok to act this way.

good luck

Big Bag of Chips

I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss her. You don't know her that long, and you don't know the dynamics of the friendship with the other girl. Her friend might be stroppy and moody, and maybe they all are just used to going along with her for the sake of a quiet night.

I wouldn't make a big deal out of this instance.. but if similar were to happen again, I'd rethink it.

Next time you meet up, you should ask her what's the deal with her friend, that you got the impression she wasn't too gone on you.

I have a friend who can be a bit jealous. I used to go along with things for the sake of a quiet life with her. It's only in the past few years that I'm suiting myself - and she can lump it or like it. Slowly she's getting the message that we are not 14 (you can add 20 or so years to that number! )

I don't think you should walk away from her, just yet- everyone deserves a chance - and it seems in this instance she just took the path of least resistance. I'm guessing she was more than a bit pissed off with her friend for cutting your night short. I know I used to get very annoyed with my friend (but I'd still go along with her!)

castle

She sounds young and immature and this type of friends thing does come up in alot of cases,friends jealous etc, best thing I would think if you really like this girl and after all she must like you to as she asked you out even if she had her mates out, I would be straight and say I do like you and would like to know more about you and if you feel the same then we should meet just the two of us, nothing ventured nothing gained at least you will know either way

TirEoghain

All the posts here seem to be talking about what happened on the night, and I don't feel that any address the issue of disntance and disinterest towards the OP, which is what I really feel that the OP is more interested in (I could be wrong, but I think if the OP was so put out by her behaviour on the night, there wouldn't have been an OP about it).

Anyway OP, based on the assumption that you're asking about where you stand, sorry, but I think it's looking bad. Not that I think she would have anticipated the friends behaviour, I have yet to see a date with a girl out with her friends lead to anything good. The silence and distance in my eyes confirms this. Sorry OP.

FrogMarch

OP - for the sake of your own self-esteem, move on.

Rented Mule

OP ....ask her out one on one. If she says 'no', then move along.

One bad night isn't always the end.

curlzy

She sounds immature and rude. She also sounds uninterested. Delete and move on OP. Her behaviour isn't that of someone who is interested in you and interested in treating you well. So yeah move on.