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Found a great girl but...l

  • 25-11-2012 2:36pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi, any advice any of you can give me would be great.

    Im 31, probably known as a'nice guy' and have little serious relationship experience.

    Have met a great girl. 8 dates, and having great fun. My lack of experience means Im quite shy in showing emotions and so we've only kissed so far and don't really talk aboutbwhat we want. Plenty of handholding, calls, texts etc but its a limbo situation.

    Id like to move to next stage. I think she is outgoing but probably shy about feelings as well. I suspect she really likes me but I am frustrating her. I keep myself in check for fear of not being gentlemanly - basically I probably come across as a coward even after a night of drinking.

    Has anybody had a similar experience, any tips?

    Thanks


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,116 ✭✭✭Lorna123


    Could you go away for a weekend and just let nature take its course without having to make any decisions about what to do next. Lying in bed together would be a good place to have a discussion if things don't work out the way you had planned.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks Lorna - its a big jump to lying in bed together! Hopefully that will happen

    Any other views would be appreciated


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,981 ✭✭✭ElleEm


    You sound very sweet!

    Usually, a natural progression would happen when the kissing goes further, so it all depends where the kissing takes place. If you only ever meet out, then it would be harder to "invite her upstairs". Why don't you have a cosy night in, cook dinner, don't drink too much, and snuggle up on the couch. When kissing gets a bit heated, ask her does she wanna head upstairs!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,230 ✭✭✭Merkin


    Sounds like you've shown yourself to be a perfect gentleman already! When you say next level I'm assuming you mean sexy time?! I think both suggestions above are great, a night away somewhere romantic or a candle lot dinner at home. Kissing is great and it's lovely getting to someone and feel respected. It's also amazing to have a hot man you fancy make it clear that he wants nothing more than to get naked with you. She already likes you as she has gone on eight dates so I really think you need to be a bit more assertive and show her the fun and cheeky side of you as well!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,708 ✭✭✭curlzy


    Hey OP,

    You're in danger of making her think you don't fancy her! It's great that you're being gentlemanly but you can go too far with that and make her confused. So yeah maybe give the 2 examples above a try, I'd go with the dinner personally because a romantic weekend away could feel a bit pressurey, if you get me?

    Best of luck.


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