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What to do?

  • 19-11-2012 3:49pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I (25) met this girl (22) from the internet five months ago and we've really hit it off; we've the same sort of humour, likes, dislikes, our personalities are quite similar.

    The problem was that she had just graduated from her undergrad was going to go abroad to work in September which made me keep my distance a little, but we still had a lot of fun up until she left. A few weeks before she left I had asked her out because I really liked her and felt she really liked me, but because she had to go abroad and she didn't want to get into a long-distance relationship, nothing happened.

    During the past five months I've grown a love for her, I've never loved someone so much before. Fast forward two months and she's back in Ireland because she couldn't live on her wages. We met again for drinks and what not and I asked her out again and revealed my true feelings about her, although I wasn't completely sure that feeling would be reciprocated.

    She was quite shocked initially, saying that five months felt too short a time for her. She said she was sorry she couldn't reciprocate the feeling but she wasn't sure what she wanted from life and that she didn't want to get into something serious until she knew where she would be and what she would be doing with her life.

    Now I don't really know what to do, I'm kind of heart-broken she didn't reciprocate but I understand people don't get these feelings at the same time. I understand her concerns that she feels her life isn't very stable at the moment and she didn't want to commit to something at the moment. I don't really know what to do at this point.

    Sorry if this post sounds really generic, don't really want to disclose more intimate details.


Comments

  • #2
    ManOfMystery
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,394 ✭✭✭ManOfMystery


    To be honest, there's nothing you can do at this point. You've told her how you feel, she's told you how she feels. The ball isn't in your court any more.

    At the risk of sounding harsh - if she was really into you she would have told you so. It sounds like she doesn't want the pressure of a relationship right now and I doubt very much this is going to change in a matter of a few weeks or months. It sounds like she is enjoying just having a fun friendship with you but doesn't want to take things any deeper.

    It's up to yourself if you want to wait and see how this pans out, and maybe her feelings will change, but if you do that then be prepared to deal with all the things that happen when you're in love with someone who isn't with you - potentially hearing about her with other guys, missing opportunities yourself whilst you're pining after her, etc.


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